The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread

[gringo_viejo]

I keep coming here to say stuff and realizing that some people's problems are way worse...
But Damn the Medications. We need them but they come with so many problems attached...
Zoloft made me not give a damn about anything at all. Job, girlfriend, family...
Prozac cratered my sex drive and it hasn't come back (off 3 years)
Wellbutrin just didn't do much at all. And some combination of the above made me want to eat EVERYTHING. Mostly chocolate covered everything.
Except maybe some of this stuff is my pathology and not the meds. Keeps me always second guessing my own brain.
So I hope y'all others who are doing this brain chemistry experiment find the combination that works for you. Or another way. Skateboarding is the only reason I get out of bed, these days.....

[gringo_viejo]

About to either quit or get fired from my fourth job in five years. "We have to go through a process," they say. "But have a wonderful weekend," they say. I'd go hit the bowl, but my back is out. Shit.

[L33Tg33k]

I’ve been feeling especially lonely since I’ve got my 2 bedroom apartment to myself. Most of the decor was my roommate’s so now the place is looking deserted and sparse. I can even hear an echo whenever I close a door or step too loudly. Also feel like I’m taking a huge step backwards because I’m losing the place and will have to move back in with my mom. Feeling like I should’ve taken my psychologist up on the ketamine treatment.

[gringo_viejo]

I’ve been feeling especially lonely since I’ve got my 2 bedroom apartment to myself. Most of the decor was my roommate’s so now the place is looking deserted and sparse. I can even hear an echo whenever I close a door or step too loudly. Also feel like I’m taking a huge step backwards because I’m losing the place and will have to move back in with my mom. Feeling like I should’ve taken my psychologist up on the ketamine treatment.

Having to live your adult life out of mom and dad's basement/office: hard.
Those hometown people who ask, "so what are you up to these days? What being you back to Midlanowhere, SD?" Double hard
Having a family that actually gives a damn: priceless.

[50mm]

I’ve been feeling especially lonely since I’ve got my 2 bedroom apartment to myself. Most of the decor was my roommate’s so now the place is looking deserted and sparse. I can even hear an echo whenever I close a door or step too loudly. Also feel like I’m taking a huge step backwards because I’m losing the place and will have to move back in with my mom. Feeling like I should’ve taken my psychologist up on the ketamine treatment.

Yo. I was pretty much in your postion, am somewhat back into it, including the ketamine treatment. A few things I want to share with you:

1. Ketamine treatment is a lot of work, and you have to continually get treated with it because it wears off. I believe you also have to spend an hour at the Dr.s' office after for monitoring and have someone to drive you. I had a Dr trying to hint to me to do it but he was a Dr. Feelgood that wore wooden fucking clogs and would have my scripts for what I take prewritten and would hand them to me when I walked in for the appointment. I knew this guy was just giving me drugs so I switched Dr.s' to one that is a true professional in 2019 and even though I changed insurance, I pay out of pocket for someone who actually takes the time to make sure I'm doing good.

2. At the beginning of 2020 I moved home from my apartment, felt like a huge step back, everything closed a month later. Not having the financial burden of an apartment that sucked was a huge stress relief and the year at home allowed me to plan my next moves which encouraged me to find a new job, and I got my dream job.

3. I just moved home again. Housing was included with my job, but I transferred because I was living on a protected area of land with no neighbors around, you had to do offroading to get to and from the house, and it was far so I was isolated for 3 years. I moved back, and its only hard because I'm not used to being around cars, hearing sirens, seeing businesses, and being in one room. But it's getting better and has already helped me plan more moves. I have stress off me now that I have a healthier home and life balance and it's helping me be more ambitious at work and in my personal life.

I wasn't getting on slap hardly ever because I couldn't skate living out there, so I forgot some of the issues you were dealing with but I remember talking to you a few times.

Living out there was really hard. I had constant car problems from bumping up and down the dirt road, constantly patching and replacing tires, having mechanical issues and not being able to get to a shop because I couldn't drive to the road I was so far back. I couldn't stand the only other person I worked with, I was overworked, and stressed the fuck out not having any social interaction. It was fun sometimes, and it hasn't been the easiest knowing I no longer get to walk out to a beautiful area at the end of the day, or just to see out my window and get me inspired, but there's a lot of things here that are making me see that its bigger.

tldr: moving home is not bad, it can help you reset/plan your next moves. I was really bummed at first moving back each time, but it always works out. Not only that but try to stay in a positive mindset even if it doesn't feel like you. I am incredibly hard on myself about everything. Even now I feel like almost everything I do at work or for myself is half assed even when I go to the extreme to do quality work. Hang in there fella!

[JM]

Hi, I didn’t know any better place to post this, but it’s from a year ago. Comic for Why so Sad, read by Rattray.

It references without naming it EMDR, which is really great for processing past things. Cool shoutout to “What Happened to You” book that he’s reading at the end in a panel.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U1FaU9fB,9c

[DERBY]

my ocd gets bad around this time of the year and i end up spiraling. i sorta wanna puke rn. coming down and touching the shame phase. the intake manifold on my car went bad and i spent the last 5 days fixing the thing along with the entire cooling system. i know absolutely nothing about cars but spent the last few weeks studying youtube videos. defs a learning experience but wtf just happened

[HeadInLionsMouth]

I feel kind of silly posting this. I'm realizing that I don't really know anyone here. Much like the rest of my life, I'm "around" but not connected with very many people. Or at least I don't feel connected.

I've struggled with really heavy depression since I was a kid. Through a lot of ups and downs, I've now found myself more down than I've ever been. Years of therapy hasn't helped, years of medication hasn't helped. I'm financially fucked because I spent the entirety of last year not working while I went through an intensive therapy program at a hospital here in NY. I burned through what little savings I had, and then found out after completing it that my insurance didn't cover most of the cost, despite what I was initially told by the insurance company. That program, of course, didn't really help. For a long time it seems like the only reason suicide wasn't an option was because I didn't want to make my loved ones sad. But now I don't know, I guess I don't have it in me to keep going. Important windows of opportunity have closed, I've failed too many times, and it's clear there's no place for me anymore. I'm kind of scared because for the first time I feel numb about it all. It's like the sadness has pushed into a realm of acceptance. I can't afford to live and I can't find purpose. What I create is just a drop in the ocean, and it's not enough to make a difference when the whole world is on fire. So I guess that's it.

I'm not sure what I'm looking for here. It's 2am and I don't have anyone to talk to, so I guess I just wanted to spill that.

[artless]

To those who lurk or post here and whatnot, much love from me. I hear youses and your brave selves. That's it.

[Dental Dan]

I feel kind of silly posting this. I'm realizing that I don't really know anyone here. Much like the rest of my life, I'm "around" but not connected with very many people. Or at least I don't feel connected.

I've struggled with really heavy depression since I was a kid. Through a lot of ups and downs, I've now found myself more down than I've ever been. Years of therapy hasn't helped, years of medication hasn't helped. I'm financially fucked because I spent the entirety of last year not working while I went through an intensive therapy program at a hospital here in NY. I burned through what little savings I had, and then found out after completing it that my insurance didn't cover most of the cost, despite what I was initially told by the insurance company. That program, of course, didn't really help. For a long time it seems like the only reason suicide wasn't an option was because I didn't want to make my loved ones sad. But now I don't know, I guess I don't have it in me to keep going. Important windows of opportunity have closed, I've failed too many times, and it's clear there's no place for me anymore. I'm kind of scared because for the first time I feel numb about it all. It's like the sadness has pushed into a realm of acceptance. I can't afford to live and I can't find purpose. What I create is just a drop in the ocean, and it's not enough to make a difference when the whole world is on fire. So I guess that's it.

I'm not sure what I'm looking for here. It's 2am and I don't have anyone to talk to, so I guess I just wanted to spill that.

Hope you're still here. I saw suicide as my destiny for a long time, so I understand a part of what you're saying. I don't know anyone on Slap either, but I don't think that matters much. Just as much as a spot or a park is anyone's game. Feel free to PM if you are looking for someone to talk to, I'll try to monitor my inbox on the off chance you do.

[Sila]

I feel kind of silly posting this. I'm realizing that I don't really know anyone here. Much like the rest of my life, I'm "around" but not connected with very many people. Or at least I don't feel connected.

I've struggled with really heavy depression since I was a kid. Through a lot of ups and downs, I've now found myself more down than I've ever been. Years of therapy hasn't helped, years of medication hasn't helped. I'm financially fucked because I spent the entirety of last year not working while I went through an intensive therapy program at a hospital here in NY. I burned through what little savings I had, and then found out after completing it that my insurance didn't cover most of the cost, despite what I was initially told by the insurance company. That program, of course, didn't really help. For a long time it seems like the only reason suicide wasn't an option was because I didn't want to make my loved ones sad. But now I don't know, I guess I don't have it in me to keep going. Important windows of opportunity have closed, I've failed too many times, and it's clear there's no place for me anymore. I'm kind of scared because for the first time I feel numb about it all. It's like the sadness has pushed into a realm of acceptance. I can't afford to live and I can't find purpose. What I create is just a drop in the ocean, and it's not enough to make a difference when the whole world is on fire. So I guess that's it.

I'm not sure what I'm looking for here. It's 2am and I don't have anyone to talk to, so I guess I just wanted to spill that.

Honestly I feel like I could've written this myself. If you see this and wanna chat, hit up my dm's.

[Jim and Dan]

I feel like I'm driving head first into a brick wall, the crash is immanent and I know it. Like drowning with your head just below the water, you can see the top but strive not to reach it. I don't know how much fight I have left in me, but what am I even fighting for at this point?   

[EXTRA SPICY]

I feel like I'm driving head first into a brick wall, the crash is immanent and I know it. Like drowning with your head just below the water, you can see the top but strive not to reach it. I don't know how much fight I have left in me, but what am I even fighting for at this point?

Where’s the anchor? Work? Relationships? Substances?

I too am a white-knuckler at times due to habit, and do my best to reach out when I see it occurring around me.

[Jim and Dan]

Expand Quote

I feel like I'm driving head first into a brick wall, the crash is immanent and I know it. Like drowning with your head just below the water, you can see the top but strive not to reach it. I don't know how much fight I have left in me, but what am I even fighting for at this point?

[close]

Where’s the anchor? Work? Relationships? Substances?

I too am a white-knuckler at times due to habit, and do my best to reach out when I see it occurring around me.

Definitely been white-knuckling this shit for the last couple of years but the anchors are work and relationships, but mostly the latter. I feel like I'm finally on the verge on ending it but it's been a long, bumpy ride full of abuse and manipulation that is difficult at times to untangle. I have good days, I have bad days and have always been a rather depressive person, it's just in my nature, so I certainly struggle with that. Work, I could honestly care less about at this point, these guys don't give a shit if I'm here or not and certainly won't fulfill the need for some form of positive reinforcement. But I've just completely checked out from it all, substance abuse is really out of the question at this point, I've been off drugs for the past 6 years and don't drink, so the only other option is change. I just want to get out there and fucking skate, but I'm the type of person that needs a crew or at the very least someone else to skate with and feed off of, skating by myself at this age is not the most fulfilling thing. I just have to bite the fucking bullet and do it, hoping that I get to keep at least one of my dogs and some of my belongings.

[mrselfdestruct]

18 and scared for the future, soon I'll be forced to move out and have my own apartment. I start work at Aldi on June 10th. I have no money to my name. help?

[JM]

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

I feel like I'm driving head first into a brick wall, the crash is immanent and I know it. Like drowning with your head just below the water, you can see the top but strive not to reach it. I don't know how much fight I have left in me, but what am I even fighting for at this point?

[close]

Where’s the anchor? Work? Relationships? Substances?

I too am a white-knuckler at times due to habit, and do my best to reach out when I see it occurring around me.

[close]

Definitely been white-knuckling this shit for the last couple of years but the anchors are work and relationships, but mostly the latter. I feel like I'm finally on the verge on ending it but it's been a long, bumpy ride full of abuse and manipulation that is difficult at times to untangle. I have good days, I have bad days and have always been a rather depressive person, it's just in my nature, so I certainly struggle with that. Work, I could honestly care less about at this point, these guys don't give a shit if I'm here or not and certainly won't fulfill the need for some form of positive reinforcement. But I've just completely checked out from it all, substance abuse is really out of the question at this point, I've been off drugs for the past 6 years and don't drink, so the only other option is change. I just want to get out there and fucking skate, but I'm the type of person that needs a crew or at the very least someone else to skate with and feed off of, skating by myself at this age is not the most fulfilling thing. I just have to bite the fucking bullet and do it, hoping that I get to keep at least one of my dogs and some of my belongings.

Don’t know how you feel about parks, but it’s a really good place to socialize with other skaters. It’s fun to give back and teach others giving tips, and sharing stoke. Get excited for other people you don’t even know. Not sure if that’s your personality but just being there around other skaters is the best thing in the world. Maybe it will work for you, but I fucking love sharing tips with skaters that I’ve talked to and opened dialogue and say things like “fuck I was I could still do that trick. Try doing ‘this’ and see how it goes.”

It’s a really good feeling to give back to others. Especially kids that are better than you and you introduced or helped them land something they couldn’t figure out.

Maybe just me, but I like being encouraging… definitely helps me feel better. (I get depressed too, and took medication last year and counseling. EMDR for some mom trauma shit).

Doing stuff for a local park, too, is gratifying.

Hope some of that helps.

Good job on staying off drugs and alcohol. That shit is ALL a lie and doesn’t help the depression at all. Maybe temporarily, but not long term.

[JM]

18 and scared for the future, soon I'll be forced to move out and have my own apartment. I start work at Aldi on June 10th. I have no money to my name. help?

Everyone goes through that. You’re in good company. You got a job set up? You’ll find a sick apartment. Live life. All good shit.

It’s scary, but promise you’re off to a good start. Aldi pays pretty well from the one I saw advertising jobs 3-4 years ago.

This is a good thing, try to tell yourself that.

[IusedToSkateMore]

18 and scared for the future, soon I'll be forced to move out and have my own apartment. I start work at Aldi on June 10th. I have no money to my name. help?

Why do you need to lock yourself into an apartment and aldi?

 I get you need to move out, not questioning that, but there’s way better shit going on with some questions asked and eyes opened. Do some AmeriCorp. or a city year. If you’re in CA, peep the California Conservation Corp. Job Corp. get an under 30 work visa and work a beach in Australia.

There are mad options that are there to be made into anything you want. No need to struggle in your hometown, homie. All of those things listed above mostly require the nerve to get it going. Wish i had known of these things 20 years ago

[JM]

Expand Quote

18 and scared for the future, soon I'll be forced to move out and have my own apartment. I start work at Aldi on June 10th. I have no money to my name. help?

[close]

Why do you need to lock yourself into an apartment and aldi?

 I get you need to move out, not questioning that, but there’s way better shit going on with some questions asked and eyes opened. Do some AmeriCorp. or a city year. If you’re in CA, peep the California Conservation Corp. Job Corp. get an under 30 work visa and work a beach in Australia.

There are mad options that are there to be made into anything you want. No need to struggle in your hometown, homie. All of those things listed above mostly require the nerve to get it going. Wish i had known of these things 20 years ago

Yes Americorp! Forgot about them.

That’s also a really good way to start your long term career… it looks really good on a resume, and even better if you’re able to go somewhere awesome. (Though, maybe anywhere new would be awesome).

[Jim and Dan]

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

I feel like I'm driving head first into a brick wall, the crash is immanent and I know it. Like drowning with your head just below the water, you can see the top but strive not to reach it. I don't know how much fight I have left in me, but what am I even fighting for at this point?

[close]

Where’s the anchor? Work? Relationships? Substances?

I too am a white-knuckler at times due to habit, and do my best to reach out when I see it occurring around me.

[close]

Definitely been white-knuckling this shit for the last couple of years but the anchors are work and relationships, but mostly the latter. I feel like I'm finally on the verge on ending it but it's been a long, bumpy ride full of abuse and manipulation that is difficult at times to untangle. I have good days, I have bad days and have always been a rather depressive person, it's just in my nature, so I certainly struggle with that. Work, I could honestly care less about at this point, these guys don't give a shit if I'm here or not and certainly won't fulfill the need for some form of positive reinforcement. But I've just completely checked out from it all, substance abuse is really out of the question at this point, I've been off drugs for the past 6 years and don't drink, so the only other option is change. I just want to get out there and fucking skate, but I'm the type of person that needs a crew or at the very least someone else to skate with and feed off of, skating by myself at this age is not the most fulfilling thing. I just have to bite the fucking bullet and do it, hoping that I get to keep at least one of my dogs and some of my belongings.

[close]

Don’t know how you feel about parks, but it’s a really good place to socialize with other skaters. It’s fun to give back and teach others giving tips, and sharing stoke. Get excited for other people you don’t even know. Not sure if that’s your personality but just being there around other skaters is the best thing in the world. Maybe it will work for you, but I fucking love sharing tips with skaters that I’ve talked to and opened dialogue and say things like “fuck I was I could still do that trick. Try doing ‘this’ and see how it goes.”

It’s a really good feeling to give back to others. Especially kids that are better than you and you introduced or helped them land something they couldn’t figure out.

Maybe just me, but I like being encouraging… definitely helps me feel better. (I get depressed too, and took medication last year and counseling. EMDR for some mom trauma shit).

Doing stuff for a local park, too, is gratifying.

Hope some of that helps.

Good job on staying off drugs and alcohol. That shit is ALL a lie and doesn’t help the depression at all. Maybe temporarily, but not long term.

Drugs are a dead end street kids, it's not for the faint at heart and a huge waste of time, as at the end you're left with all of the problems that led you down that road in the first place.

I do go to the local sometimes, sometimes it's dead and other times it's popping, but I always get stoked on whoever is skating there, no matter what the ability level. I'll talk to the other people there frequently and gain respect quickly, I just never really follow-up with people after that. I'll travel further out to some other parks here and there, it's just tough with my schedule. I'm trying to get out of this state and back to the one I'm from, there is a strong scene with a lot of the people I grew up skating with that are still skating, it's just been a process but I feel like I'm finally coming to the end of the road here, as I have little to no patience anymore for the constant barrage of bullshit I encounter on a daily basis.

I appreciate the banter @JM, it does help since I don't like talking about most things with friends or family, as I feel like most people are sick of hearing the same shit they've been hearing for years and feel like a burden most of the time. 

[IusedToSkateMore]

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

18 and scared for the future, soon I'll be forced to move out and have my own apartment. I start work at Aldi on June 10th. I have no money to my name. help?

[close]

Why do you need to lock yourself into an apartment and aldi?

 I get you need to move out, not questioning that, but there’s way better shit going on with some questions asked and eyes opened. Do some AmeriCorp. or a city year. If you’re in CA, peep the California Conservation Corp. Job Corp. get an under 30 work visa and work a beach in Australia.

There are mad options that are there to be made into anything you want. No need to struggle in your hometown, homie. All of those things listed above mostly require the nerve to get it going. Wish i had known of these things 20 years ago

[close]

Yes Americorp! Forgot about them.

That’s also a really good way to start your long term career… it looks really good on a resume, and even better if you’re able to go somewhere awesome. (Though, maybe anywhere new would be awesome).

Even juat to get out ans find a new place and/or way tp exist. I had some homies that served the max amount of time in Americorp, building trails in PNW. They never came back! Id gotten accepted to a City Year down in Baton Rouge in 07 and was planning on driving down from where i was living in my car in NC, but i decided to party and skate instead. Ive taken more chances and attempted life paths than many and fallen on my ass a good number of times, which at this juncture, 39 and clean, has made for a good, interesting life, taught me adaptability, how to make it my own, but i think guided shit is what most young adults need. Doesnt have to be a job or college, but some sort of calling or desire to grow

[JM]

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

I feel like I'm driving head first into a brick wall, the crash is immanent and I know it. Like drowning with your head just below the water, you can see the top but strive not to reach it. I don't know how much fight I have left in me, but what am I even fighting for at this point?

[close]

Where’s the anchor? Work? Relationships? Substances?

I too am a white-knuckler at times due to habit, and do my best to reach out when I see it occurring around me.

[close]

Definitely been white-knuckling this shit for the last couple of years but the anchors are work and relationships, but mostly the latter. I feel like I'm finally on the verge on ending it but it's been a long, bumpy ride full of abuse and manipulation that is difficult at times to untangle. I have good days, I have bad days and have always been a rather depressive person, it's just in my nature, so I certainly struggle with that. Work, I could honestly care less about at this point, these guys don't give a shit if I'm here or not and certainly won't fulfill the need for some form of positive reinforcement. But I've just completely checked out from it all, substance abuse is really out of the question at this point, I've been off drugs for the past 6 years and don't drink, so the only other option is change. I just want to get out there and fucking skate, but I'm the type of person that needs a crew or at the very least someone else to skate with and feed off of, skating by myself at this age is not the most fulfilling thing. I just have to bite the fucking bullet and do it, hoping that I get to keep at least one of my dogs and some of my belongings.

[close]

Don’t know how you feel about parks, but it’s a really good place to socialize with other skaters. It’s fun to give back and teach others giving tips, and sharing stoke. Get excited for other people you don’t even know. Not sure if that’s your personality but just being there around other skaters is the best thing in the world. Maybe it will work for you, but I fucking love sharing tips with skaters that I’ve talked to and opened dialogue and say things like “fuck I was I could still do that trick. Try doing ‘this’ and see how it goes.”

It’s a really good feeling to give back to others. Especially kids that are better than you and you introduced or helped them land something they couldn’t figure out.

Maybe just me, but I like being encouraging… definitely helps me feel better. (I get depressed too, and took medication last year and counseling. EMDR for some mom trauma shit).

Doing stuff for a local park, too, is gratifying.

Hope some of that helps.

Good job on staying off drugs and alcohol. That shit is ALL a lie and doesn’t help the depression at all. Maybe temporarily, but not long term.

[close]

Drugs are a dead end street kids, it's not for the faint at heart and a huge waste of time, as at the end you're left with all of the problems that led you down that road in the first place.

I do go to the local sometimes, sometimes it's dead and other times it's popping, but I always get stoked on whoever is skating there, no matter what the ability level. I'll talk to the other people there frequently and gain respect quickly, I just never really follow-up with people after that. I'll travel further out to some other parks here and there, it's just tough with my schedule. I'm trying to get out of this state and back to the one I'm from, there is a strong scene with a lot of the people I grew up skating with that are still skating, it's just been a process but I feel like I'm finally coming to the end of the road here, as I have little to no patience anymore for the constant barrage of bullshit I encounter on a daily basis.

I appreciate the banter @JM, it does help since I don't like talking about most things with friends or family, as I feel like most people are sick of hearing the same shit they've been hearing for years and feel like a burden most of the time.

No problem! Good to chat.

I’d say if you don’t have any attachments where you’re at go have a little adventure back to your state. Enjoy the ride. Meet new people. Hook up with your old homies.

[Conman9000]

shout out to everyone else who doesn't off themselves because there's still hope you could land a switch front shove over that gap one of these days.. after that it'll be something else.. thank fuck for skateboarding

[Gnar_Gnar]

Wanted to throw out this free chatbot that utilizes Internal Family Systems therapy techniques.  Heed and read the disclaimer, talk with your therapist and see if IFS is right, but it's been helpful for me.

https://www.ifsbuddy.chat

[Ms. Tamzarian]

everyone in this thread, I am so grateful you are here! wow it's been three & one half years since this thread began : ) and you know what, we're still fuckin out here, dude! we are still around. Things might not be great, but that is still really fucking cool.

tomorrow feels like a really symbolic day, it is the first day I'll be travelling to see friends since my life got turned upside down : ')

as of June, I celebrated one & one-half years since escaping from what I hope will be the most violent person I ever met

It's taken me a long time to even be ready to think about it, let alone open up about it, let alone be ready to live again, you know? ugh. I am so grateful for therapy oof

but fuck that, I am turning the corner!

I may have lost everything I had in my life before the bad times started, before I met the bad person... but I have new things now, and I have done my best to create an even better life than I had before : ')

and this, he cannot take from me

[Dental Dan]

Wanted to throw out this free chatbot that utilizes Internal Family Systems therapy techniques.  Heed and read the disclaimer, talk with your therapist and see if IFS is right, but it's been helpful for me.

https://www.ifsbuddy.chat

I know you've since focused but thanks for posting this 

I've found that the IFS framework has been helping me feel feelings, and the compassionate angle is crucial for someone like me who needs help being kind to themself. Probably noteworthy that I've felt some improvement in my emotional state just from using this AI tool (in conjunction with listening to a couple of podcasts and learning the basics of IFS).

[mfweeno]

shout out to everyone else who doesn't off themselves because there's still hope you could land a switch front shove over that gap one of these days.. after that it'll be something else.. thank fuck for skateboarding

Been swimming in a lot of negativity between the ears today - just wanted to let you know this post helped me out a little bit.

[lemonchicken91]

Just stopping by to vent

Got a new job in march after being laid off in november,
was too complacent at last job and mis my coworkers

new job is much more pay and ive been letting it stress me out (larger company more corporate)
I'm doing well and upgrded my apt and money situation but I am losing sleep from stress.

ITs not even that stressful I am just putting too much pressure on myself.
I think the shadow of being a degenerate skate graff bro hovers over me sometimes as I mask as a corporate overachiever

this has only goten worse, went on prozac this summer and it made me stoney and forgetful so i stopped and still feel like im shaking the muddd off.

I am just forgetting basic shit and my BP is insane.

I have not been skating, jamming tunes, or working out at all.
Need to escape the pit but the coping is too gnarly

[h00man]

going through a tough time mentally recently. Skating definitely helps. I hope you you PALS out there are doing well!

[lazer69]

Society seems really fake to me