hell yeah, it's one of the few things keeping me sane and hopeful. i knew who i was from early on but i've had a strange and difficult life so it's really great to get a clear idea of who i am. all i did was chase relationships and stray away from what i should have been doing. i hope so too. i pray to what ever is out there all the time that i will be allowed to continue. thank you for the kind words man, i really appreciate it
EDIT: overuse of the word "man"
I think we kind of all have this basic sense of identity as in who we are and what we essentially want to do in our lives to begin with, but it's a struggle to remain in touch with the self enough to actually realize those directions that we're naturally inclined to take, in a world brimming with all kinds of distractions; at least relationships are constructive experiences, one needs to go through them in order to learn about their own self first and foremost and better understand the limits of what they're really ready to give and take and do and not do in life, they help you find your current boundaries and thus definition (so that you can better perceive how to get closer to personal happiness on your own and improve your focus as opposed to tumbling around in the dark, which is important).
The only relationships that suck are the ones you get out of having learned (and/or taught) nothing, thankfully those are rare (or maybe I have an attraction to women who are likely to put me out of my comfort zone to quite extreme levels so that the both of us always end up learning new things, but that's something else). Anyway you shouldn't feel too bad for 'straying' away from yourself, it was also yourself who gave all those other things a try because at the time you needed to or for some reason had to, and the process was successful as now you are doing good and more aware of what you really want to do. What I think happened is you went through a certain phase of your life out of which you came having built upon your original person for the best is all, so you barely recognize your old self anymore looking back but it was just part of your evolution, existence seems to be all about those cycles. And yeah, my pleasure!