I've been the cold, stone-faced asshole in the military and really, the only success I've had with people are the few I opened up to in the ways outlined in that book before I even read it. I had success gaining rank, but the ride is lonely when nobody seems to really have your back except because of it.
It's not about being a pushover.
I read it as reaching out to people and being sincere in the face of all that coldness that exists in the business space. If you're the one guy who honestly wants to know about and appreciate the people that work for you, then your people will champion you for being unlike other managers and bosses.
It's very much how I treat people in my personal life that I allow into my circle, but I kept it very separate from how I acted in the military.
Seems like I've been mostly doing wrong following the wrong examples when I could have been doing right all along if I just did what I usually do.
I'll just leave the shitting on other people to this messageboard.