Things You Pondered Today

[Mad Lauder]

How do mer-people reproduce?  Are mermen swimming around with hidden units inside their bodies, like whales do, ready to harpoon some mer-poon when its hot and ready, or do the mermaids simply lay a bunch of eggs in a shell and then the mermen swim up nut all over them like fishes do?

this was on a futurama episode that ive seen atleast 3 times but cant remember what the mermaid said.

[Joust Ostrich]

When was the last time I saw a Black Label board?  I really can't recall.  It has been since before they went to Blitz.  How are they still in Bizzo?  I'd ride one, possibly, but I sure haven't seen one.

[bakingsoda]

I wonder if mass mounts of ear wax - like a pound of it - would be a versitile material. Maybe we could make pottery or sculptures out of it, would it dry and harden? Or what about actually making a candle with it, would it smell?

Would harvesting ear wax from one person to the next produce different pliability which maybe more desired depending on its use and then would a rating system to meassure this be issued when it's being packaged for purchase.

[Joust Ostrich]

Where the fuck is my wallet?

I remember asking myself, "do you think I'm going to remember that I put this here"?

But this morning, I sure didn't.

[ttching!]

How is Supra not out in front on producing these?

[MuchasGracias]

Is there a drug that contains all drugs inside it, kinda like the drug on Scanner Darkly?

[ttching!]

Given Spain's current fiscal and employment woes, would they consider selling and relocating some of their sick bank spots?

[BRIX SKWIKZ]

MAN I THINK THEY DONT WORK BECAUSE THEY DONT WANT DUDE
ITS JUST FUCKIN SIESTA TIME ALL THE TIME
AND THEY WANT THE SPOTS ALL TO THEMSELVES
NO HAOLES WEARIN THEM OUT

[happenstance]

MAN I THINK THEY DONT WORK BECAUSE THEY DONT WANT DUDE
ITS JUST FUCKIN SIESTA TIME ALL THE TIME
AND THEY WANT THE SPOTS ALL TO THEMSELVES
NO HAOLES WEARIN THEM OUT

1. You have no idea what you are talking about.
2. LOL at haoles.

[brycickle]

Expand Quote

MAN I THINK THEY DONT WORK BECAUSE THEY DONT WANT DUDE
ITS JUST FUCKIN SIESTA TIME ALL THE TIME
AND THEY WANT THE SPOTS ALL TO THEMSELVES
NO HAOLES WEARIN THEM OUT

[close]

1. You have no idea what you are talking about.
2. LOL at haoles.

Although older Spaniards do call the younger ones the "Nini generation" Ni estudio, ni trabajo.

[midwestmiddleman]

slappals are like flies on a turd.

[Mad Lauder]

Since Nyjahs in this commercial why didnt they ask him to do a trick?
Whyd the get some random looking girls to do a boo boo tre?
Is it supposed to be some woman empowerment shit?

[ttching!]

slappals are like flies on a turd.

[Bronson]

Are there contact lenses for animals? I might google it.

[_UniversalTruth_]

Should I wash my hands everytime before I eat something? Cus everyting can be dirtyier than expected. Look:

[The Human Condom]

How would a girl respond if you told her that you had a dream about her in which you asked her if she wanted to go make out and in the dream she just started laughing at you?  Would she just start laughing at you in reality as well?

[sleepypancakes]

How would a girl respond if you told her that you had a dream about her in which you asked her if she wanted to go make out and in the dream she just started laughing at you?  Would she just start laughing at you in reality as well?

That or be entirely creeped out. Don't do that

[KOOL MIKE]

why does everyone else or most people take so long to do shits, i can snap a shit out, wipe my ass and wash my hands in like a minute. do they not realise you can push a poo out?

[Money Black]

i was told the other day if you got shot and went into a hospital in america and you didn't have private health insurance, they would just leave you to die,  is that true?

[ice nine]

Nah prolly some lil black kid will be fukkin around and put his finger on the bullet and push to make u die faster

I m wondering how olivia munn, kirsten dunst and kristen stewart all showed their tits in movies recently and I didn't kno till now.

[Patey]

why does everyone else or most people take so long to do shits, i can snap a shit out, wipe my ass and wash my hands in like a minute. do they not realise you can push a poo out?

some people like to chill, man. sit back, relax, contemplate life.

learn to enjoy the finer things in life, bro

[pica]

why does everyone else or most people take so long to do shits, i can snap a shit out, wipe my ass and wash my hands in like a minute. do they not realise you can push a poo out?

if i have to i can snap it out in under a minute as well, but i'd rather take my 20 minutes while reading thrashers from 1997.

[ciaran]

why does everyone else or most people take so long to do shits, i can snap a shit out, wipe my ass and wash my hands in like a minute. do they not realise you can push a poo out?

It's often useful to try save your shits for when you're at work, that way you get paid for it and you also save on buying loo roll, bleach, etc.  Double cashback...

[The Human Condom]

Expand Quote

How would a girl respond if you told her that you had a dream about her in which you asked her if she wanted to go make out and in the dream she just started laughing at you?  Would she just start laughing at you in reality as well?

[close]

That or be entirely creeped out. Don't do that

The trippy thing is thinking about that.  If I were to do that and then it played out like it did in the dream, it would be deja vu or just like a prediction that came true.  The only way that would not create some sort of infinite loop is if we made out or if I just didn't ever mention that or think about that again.  Maybe if I explained it out like that it would work.

[brycickle]

why does everyone else or most people take so long to do shits, i can snap a shit out, wipe my ass and wash my hands in like a minute. do they not realise you can push a poo out?

If you knew how to read you would understand.

[RCB3]

Track with me on this one:

I wear contacts and see a blurry cluster of shit if I don't have them in. If someone was filming something and put my contact lens in front of the camera lens and then imported the footage, would it look clear to me and blurry to other people? I always take for granted that a movie looks the same to everyone, but if it is filmed with a glass sheet in front of it with a prescription for vision, would that changes things? I'm sure there's an elementary answer to this, but for some reason I've pondered it a lot.

[KOOL MIKE]

Expand Quote

why does everyone else or most people take so long to do shits, i can snap a shit out, wipe my ass and wash my hands in like a minute. do they not realise you can push a poo out?

[close]

some people like to chill, man. sit back, relax, contemplate life.

learn to enjoy the finer things in life, bro

i can't relax when a penis shaped object is sliding through my butthole

[KOOL MIKE]

Expand Quote

why does everyone else or most people take so long to do shits, i can snap a shit out, wipe my ass and wash my hands in like a minute. do they not realise you can push a poo out?

[close]

It's often useful to try save your shits for when you're at work, that way you get paid for it and you also save on buying loo roll, bleach, etc.  Double cashback...

this one i can understand i use to do this myself when i was working, although i'd still snap the motherfucker quick, than just chill in the toilet.


but i dunno i guess i'm just not a guy that enjoys shits, now pissing thats a whole different ball game, sometimes better than cummin.

[buttpirate]

Track with me on this one:

I wear contacts and see a blurry cluster of shit if I don't have them in. If someone was filming something and put my contact lens in front of the camera lens and then imported the footage, would it look clear to me and blurry to other people? I always take for granted that a movie looks the same to everyone, but if it is filmed with a glass sheet in front of it with a prescription for vision, would that changes things? I'm sure there's an elementary answer to this, but for some reason I've pondered it a lot.

no, it would just look blurrier. 

glasses/contacts work by bending rays of light passing through them, and effectively modifying the light's focal length so it falls onto the retina inside your eye.  Think of the retina as a screen in a movie theatre - if the projector isn't focused right, it will look blurry. 

Short-sightedness is caused because the eye's focal length is in front of the retina (i.e. the focusing point ends up short), and is corrected by having light bent outward to correct it through a concave lens (see diagram below):



Long-sightedness is the opposite - where the focal length falls beyond the retina, and is corrected via a convex lens which bends the light in even further



if you filmed with an hypothetical contact lens over a video camera, all you would get is an out of focus image.  Which if you're watching it without any further optical aids, will be even blurrier.

[Jack Klompis]

i can't relax when a penis shaped object is sliding through my butthole

are you worried that if you enjoy pooping you might be gay?? at least your diet is seemingly healthy