How Relationships Work

[_aminal]

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Why does somebody who sleeps around get angry when you go on lunch with a girl or go to a party ?

[close]

because they finally realize that if they can get away with it, so can you

[close]

doesnt make sense still , I mean if I was cheating on some girl I was dating or loved , why would I get mad if they did the same ?

its shitty to cheat or be cheated on

the only way not to feel guilt or anger would be honesty.

if you guys arent open about fuckin around with a little side piece

then you are gonna be pissed when you see yr significant others potential cheat.

cause you know youve got one that yr hiding!!

[augustmoon]

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Why does somebody who sleeps around get angry when you go on lunch with a girl or go to a party ?

[close]

because they finally realize that if they can get away with it, so can you

[close]

doesnt make sense still , I mean if I was cheating on some girl I was dating or loved , why would I get mad if they did the same ?

some girls just want to have their cake and eat it too.  also, they're motivated by protecting their own ass.  like someone said earlier, they've got backups waiting in the wings they're stringing along.   people do really fucked up things to preserve their own ego. 

not that guys aren't pieces of shit too, just usually in different ways. 

[blackalbino]

they dont

[Ollie Ringwald]

they dont

Monogamous ones sure don't. Monogamy has always been a myth, now with the internet and what not it's pointless even trying.

[LESBIAN]

mahogany is no myth, why do i feel lonely on cold winter nights?

[twitchflip]

This one is very recent, February to be exact. I started dating this girl in 2008, fell in love with her. She was honestly the only thing that made me happy, we had so much in common, it was insane how much I loved this girl. My ex is a tattoo artist, so she would always be tattooing me and my homies. My BEST friend, who I grew up with and considered a brother, went up to her shop with her back in August of last year, he had the brilliant idea of telling her I had been cheating on her with my ex ( which was completely false) needless to say she believed him. After that we tried to work things out, but it just got worse, she said she couldn't trust me. Not to mention, a week before my "friend" stabbed me in the back, I bought her an engagement ring. Anyway, in February of this year, she said she couldn't do it anymore. Not 2 weeks later she already had a new boyfriend who she met in some bar. After that, I went into a deep, deep depression. I started drinking every day, doing heroin, and have tried to commit suicide three times this year, most recent being a month ago when I drove my car head on into a tree when I was wasted, didn't die, just totaled my car. It was getting so bad, that I got kicked out of the band I was singing in, and literally almost all my friends have turned their backs, because they can't handle my depression. As of now I have nothing, lost my girlfriend of 5 years, my car, got layed off from my job in January, and have little to no contact with any of my close friends. I literally am on my own now, never felt like this in 25 years of living, now I have nothing but a potential heroin addiction, and a constant thought of suicide. I'm just now starting to feel normal, but I know I have a ways to go. The stories I've read  in this topic give me inspiration though, it makes me realize I'm not the only one who has felt this pain, and that life will get better if I want it to, thanks to everyone for sharing.

that's heavy. wishing you the best of luck on your recovery. try getting outdoors and into the fresh air more. keep it positive and stay off the junk - that shit will ruin you. you got this!

[castillo's curls]

I had the hottest girlfriend when I was 16. She was a 10. I broke up with her after she told me she kissed another dude. She told me she was in love with me and I just said "thanks". After we broke up she went on a crazy fucking spree. She fucked at least 10 dudes that I know about in that year. It's like when you see some hot girl in porn and think "she used to have a boyfriend who loved her and now she has 2 dicks in her mouth, what the fuck happened to this girl". It really fucked my head up. The crazy thing is that I loved her, but I was afraid to say it and to proud to forgive her for kissing some dude. I broke her heart and then she ruined herself by becoming the biggest slut the school had ever seen. 20 years ago, still makes me sad.

holy shit! I read this post and missed the "she was a 10". I thought she was actually 10 yo.   

[KOOL MIKE]

I had the hottest girlfriend when I was 16. She was a 10. I broke up with her after she told me she kissed another dude. She told me she was in love with me and I just said "thanks". After we broke up she went on a crazy fucking spree. She fucked at least 10 dudes that I know about in that year. It's like when you see some hot girl in porn and think "she used to have a boyfriend who loved her and now she has 2 dicks in her mouth, what the fuck happened to this girl". It really fucked my head up. The crazy thing is that I loved her, but I was afraid to say it and to proud to forgive her for kissing some dude. I broke her heart and then she ruined herself by becoming the biggest slut the school had ever seen. 20 years ago, still makes me sad.

20 years ago, shit, she must of had a pretty hairy vag

[formeitscrazylike]

Never had a bad one, but one time I walked into a party and I saw this girl I had been kinda dating there who was playing beer pong in sweat pants and a sweatshirt, had some of the female snus dip tobacco in her lip, and drinks a red cup and goes "WWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!"

and I broke up with her over that. Just couldn't deal with the overwhelming amount of trailer trash that she encompassed at that one moment in time. After I later told her "I dunno why the fuck I'm fuckin with YOU" and she cried.

So, I'm kinda on the opposite side of most of these stories, but that bitch sucked too, 'cept I got the fun at the end.

BTW, if you ever have a chance to date a chick from Alaska, don't.

[Beeda Weeda]

life is complicated, finding that perfect balance can be difficult, patience and the ability to be honest with yourself are important aspects of developing a good relationship.
you cant rely on a girl to make you happy, you must both be happy, and be happy together.
trust your gut, follow your heart.


BRO

[Rumpleforeskin]

life is complicated, finding that perfect balance can be difficult, patience and the ability to be honest with yourself are important aspects of developing a good relationship.
you cant rely on a girl to make you happy, you must both be happy, and be happy together.
trust your gut, follow your heart.


BRO

Well said, brotha man. Shout out to all the fellow slap boys that got their heart ripped out by some dark-haired beauty. I see y'all and ya boy is here for all my dawgs.

[woodsman]

The first time I was with a chick with a shaved pussy was '95,  my friends all told me that meant she had crabs. Trimming the bush was rare back then.

[pencil]

I had the hottest girlfriend when I was 16. She was a 10. I broke up with her after she told me she kissed another dude. She told me she was in love with me and I just said "thanks". After we broke up she went on a crazy fucking spree. She fucked at least 10 dudes that I know about in that year. It's like when you see some hot girl in porn and think "she used to have a boyfriend who loved her and now she has 2 dicks in her mouth, what the fuck happened to this girl". It really fucked my head up. The crazy thing is that I loved her, but I was afraid to say it and to proud to forgive her for kissing some dude. I broke her heart and then she ruined herself by becoming the biggest slut the school had ever seen. 20 years ago, still makes me sad.

i thought you said she was 10 hahahahahh

[Jack Klompis]

Never had a bad one, but one time I walked into a party and I saw this girl I had been kinda dating there who was playing beer pong in sweat pants and a sweatshirt, had some of the female snus dip tobacco in her lip, and drinks a red cup and goes "WWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!"

and I broke up with her over that. Just couldn't deal with the overwhelming amount of trailer trash that she encompassed at that one moment in time. After I later told her "I dunno why the fuck I'm fuckin with YOU" and she cried.

So, I'm kinda on the opposite side of most of these stories, but that bitch sucked too, 'cept I got the fun at the end.

BTW, if you ever have a chance to date a chick from Alaska, don't.

[brownjenkin]

life is complicated, finding that perfect balance can be difficult, patience and the ability to be honest with yourself are important aspects of developing a good relationship.
you cant rely on a girl to make you happy, you must both be happy, and be happy together.
trust your gut, follow your heart.


BRO

This. People lie to themselves constantly because they want so desperately for things to work. And there's nothing that screams trouble more than a person who says they 'need' somebody else.

[pugmaster]

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This one is very recent, February to be exact. I started dating this girl in 2008, fell in love with her. She was honestly the only thing that made me happy, we had so much in common, it was insane how much I loved this girl. My ex is a tattoo artist, so she would always be tattooing me and my homies. My BEST friend, who I grew up with and considered a brother, went up to her shop with her back in August of last year, he had the brilliant idea of telling her I had been cheating on her with my ex ( which was completely false) needless to say she believed him. After that we tried to work things out, but it just got worse, she said she couldn't trust me. Not to mention, a week before my "friend" stabbed me in the back, I bought her an engagement ring. Anyway, in February of this year, she said she couldn't do it anymore. Not 2 weeks later she already had a new boyfriend who she met in some bar. After that, I went into a deep, deep depression. I started drinking every day, doing heroin, and have tried to commit suicide three times this year, most recent being a month ago when I drove my car head on into a tree when I was wasted, didn't die, just totaled my car. It was getting so bad, that I got kicked out of the band I was singing in, and literally almost all my friends have turned their backs, because they can't handle my depression. As of now I have nothing, lost my girlfriend of 5 years, my car, got layed off from my job in January, and have little to no contact with any of my close friends. I literally am on my own now, never felt like this in 25 years of living, now I have nothing but a potential heroin addiction, and a constant thought of suicide. I'm just now starting to feel normal, but I know I have a ways to go. The stories I've read  in this topic give me inspiration though, it makes me realize I'm not the only one who has felt this pain, and that life will get better if I want it to, thanks to everyone for sharing.

[close]

that's heavy. wishing you the best of luck on your recovery. try getting outdoors and into the fresh air more. keep it positive and stay off the junk - that shit will ruin you. you got this!

That sucks your friend did that.  Better to weed those type of people out of your life early on though!  There are way way WAY more fish in the sea so don't trip.  The best thing you can do is be productive.  The best revenge is success.  Find what makes you happy and run with it.  Life is too short to waste on a girl who doesn't trust you or some jackass who would pull some shit like that over some ass.  I bet you anything, after five years of running a tight ship and having your shit together, you won't look at him or her in the same light.  They will be an afterthought, a mere catalyst for you moving onto the next phase of your life.

[Tufty]

 A girl making you happy sounds too heavy for me. Never felt like that even with my high school crush that i shared the story. I had some girls in the past and never felt that. I was always interested in getting to know them but after that i was bored. I dont know if i am a dick or all the girls i ve met are dull.

 I even have the best girl now. She is always supportive and almost never bitches about things. She is pretty and amazing at bed. She is looking after me and cooks everything. Even though she has all these she is kinda boring.  When we are having talks she never says something clever or funny. She has always an optimistic and naive view on things that sometimes gets into my nerves. She is not stupid but she lacks wit and humour and i value these most.

 She confessed that she is in love with me few months ago and this made me feel awkward. I care about her and i dont wanna make her sad, but sometimes i am better without her. Indeed most times i am without her because i got a busy schedule with school and i try to skate a lot. Fuck, she even understands that and never bitches about that.

 On the other hand sometimes i do miss her and i wanna be with her. I told her that i am not in love with her and she didnt believe me. This makes things more complicated.

 Anyway why girls have always bad humour?

[the whompler]

im going through an extremely rough patch right now... i hope i can salvage my relationship, took me 29yrs to find her.. love her to bits...
japanese cultural and language barriers are one of the major setbacks to our relationship... and she is stressing about the future of us to the point where she sees its not going to workout (being japanese she bottles up everything (我慢してる）until it overwhelms her and then explodes)。 i've been an emotional wreck all week... and its going to have to come to a conclusion this week

since nobody but cotg knows who i really am i'll anonymously throw my hat into the mix.
im in a kind of similar boat as you drew. she won't talk to me and the whole thing is kind of teetering in limbo. i've been with this girl for 5yrs and after she finds a career as a loan officer (which pays really good money) she suddenly decides that we want different things out of life. i've gladly paid for everything for the last five years including a 3 week trip to hawaii and several other vacations. i've worked hard to be good to her during our time together. so much so that her mom actually called me in tears at 1am a few nights ago, trying to convince me to try and win her back.  this makes things more difficult for me because my x is the one who called it off. of course im still in love but im already miserably trying to pick up the pieces and move on with my life. this shit is fucking with my head tremendously. im already emotionally pussy footin on shaky ground as my best friend died a couple months ago and i was the only person there when it happened. i've become a complete mental and emotional mess. i can't eat, sleep, skate or work. fuck

[Made In China]

[Chinaskis underpants]

shout out to my homies, the forever-alones

[Merked]

A girl making you happy sounds too heavy for me. Never felt like that even with my high school crush that i shared the story. I had some girls in the past and never felt that. I was always interested in getting to know them but after that i was bored. I dont know if i am a dick or all the girls i ve met are dull.

 I even have the best girl now. She is always supportive and almost never bitches about things. She is pretty and amazing at bed. She is looking after me and cooks everything. Even though she has all these she is kinda boring.  When we are having talks she never says something clever or funny. She has always an optimistic and naive view on things that sometimes gets into my nerves. She is not stupid but she lacks wit and humour and i value these most.

 She confessed that she is in love with me few months ago and this made me feel awkward. I care about her and i dont wanna make her sad, but sometimes i am better without her. Indeed most times i am without her because i got a busy schedule with school and i try to skate a lot. Fuck, she even understands that and never bitches about that.

 On the other hand sometimes i do miss her and i wanna be with her. I told her that i am not in love with her and she didnt believe me. This makes things more complicated.

 Anyway why girls have always bad humour?

I was in the same exact boat.  My ex did all this shit for me, but I just kinda felt like she didn't stimulate me on an intellectual level and that I had to drive the conversations and add all of the comedic value to make it interesting.  I was always the one to crack jokes and make her laugh.  Felt like I was the entertainment in the relationship.  I have noticed that most girls are fucking boring and I feel like it stems from their lack of hobbies.  Most girls I meet have no real fucking hobbies or interests, and if they do it is only a slight few. 

Yet, Tufty, I would bring it up to her and see if she can be become more stimulating to you.  I know telling her she is boring is a super dick move, but if you could figure out a way to do this nicely, maybe she would become more interesting.  Feel like it is worth a shot because she seems to be a keeper aside from the boring aspect.

[pencil]

shout out to my homies, the forever-alonies

[Merked]

^^ Good point.

[Tufty]

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 Anyway why girls have always bad humour?

[close]

Not sure why so many dudes have this outlook. Yes I've met many bland chicks, but I've met way more bland dudes who don't seem to have a real personality. Fuck man, have you met some of the kids skateboarding these days? Less personality than a bag of rocks.

If you're meeting people you think aren't funny, you're in the wrong scene.

  We are skateboarders dude, we should be Gay.

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[close]

I was in the same exact boat.  My ex did all this shit for me, but I just kinda felt like she didn't stimulate me on an intellectual level and that I had to drive the conversations and add all of the comedic value to make it interesting.  I was always the one to crack jokes and make her laugh.  Felt like I was the entertainment in the relationship.  I have noticed that most girls are fucking boring and I feel like it stems from their lack of hobbies.  Most girls I meet have no real fucking hobbies or interests, and if they do it is only a slight few. 

Yet, Tufty, I would bring it up to her and see if she can be become more stimulating to you.  I know telling her she is boring is a super dick move, but if you could figure out a way to do this nicely, maybe she would become more interesting.  Feel like it is worth a shot because she seems to be a keeper aside from the boring aspect.

Yeah man my thoughts exactly.

I ve done the second one but she thinks i am joking mostly. Sometimes she gets pissed, whatever i am moving to another city in a few months anyway

[Liam Baker]

For some reason no girl has ever wanted to be in a relationship with me lol

[L33Tg33k]

shout out to my homies, the forever-alones

As to the guys saying girls will do nothing for your happiness. I think I would be a much happier person if I had regular sex....Or sex at all.

[MuchasGracias]

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life is complicated, finding that perfect balance can be difficult, patience and the ability to be honest with yourself are important aspects of developing a good relationship.
you cant rely on a girl to make you happy, you must both be happy, and be happy together.
trust your gut, follow your heart.


BRO

[close]

Well said, brotha man. Shout out to all the fellow slap boys that got their heart ripped out by some dark-haired beauty. I see y'all and ya boy is here for all my dawgs.

word up homie.

[neko]

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A girl making you happy sounds too heavy for me. Never felt like that even with my high school crush that i shared the story. I had some girls in the past and never felt that. I was always interested in getting to know them but after that i was bored. I dont know if i am a dick or all the girls i ve met are dull.

 I even have the best girl now. She is always supportive and almost never bitches about things. She is pretty and amazing at bed. She is looking after me and cooks everything. Even though she has all these she is kinda boring.  When we are having talks she never says something clever or funny. She has always an optimistic and naive view on things that sometimes gets into my nerves. She is not stupid but she lacks wit and humour and i value these most.

 She confessed that she is in love with me few months ago and this made me feel awkward. I care about her and i dont wanna make her sad, but sometimes i am better without her. Indeed most times i am without her because i got a busy schedule with school and i try to skate a lot. Fuck, she even understands that and never bitches about that.

 On the other hand sometimes i do miss her and i wanna be with her. I told her that i am not in love with her and she didnt believe me. This makes things more complicated.

 Anyway why girls have always bad humour?

[close]

I was in the same exact boat.  My ex did all this shit for me, but I just kinda felt like she didn't stimulate me on an intellectual level and that I had to drive the conversations and add all of the comedic value to make it interesting.  I was always the one to crack jokes and make her laugh.  Felt like I was the entertainment in the relationship.  I have noticed that most girls are fucking boring and I feel like it stems from their lack of hobbies.  Most girls I meet have no real fucking hobbies or interests, and if they do it is only a slight few. 

Yet, Tufty, I would bring it up to her and see if she can be become more stimulating to you.  I know telling her she is boring is a super dick move, but if you could figure out a way to do this nicely, maybe she would become more interesting.  Feel like it is worth a shot because she seems to be a keeper aside from the boring aspect.

Likely won't work. I've noticed this with a number of girls over the years, and have brought it up in a variety of different ways. None were effective. People aren't boring because no one's told them not to be, they're boring because they're boring.

My girl now isn't boring, has her own interests and obsessions, and it's so rad. Like night and day from previous relationships. We hang a lot, but I never feel guilty about pursuing my myriad obsessive little hobbies. Such a breath of fresh air.

[sexualhelon]

I haven't really been in a serious relationship but will add my 2 cents since it seems relevant. About the girls being boring thing, I don't think that it's just that girls are boring but most people are boring - sort of just how I feel that I don't like 95% of people in general. When you meet the right one I think things will just click just the way it has with all of my best friends. With all of my really good friends we never had to "warm up" to each other it was pretty instant from the time we first met.  Relationships tend to form the same way just in different senses with the two most important ones being friendships and romantic relationships.

My problem is just that with touring, traveling, and in general wanting to live life unrestrained while being able to lose myself then find myself again I've never managed to have a serious girlfriend. Some people will say it's because I move around a lot but I beg to differ because I don't think staying one place to find a girl really matters - you could meet anywhere and it would be instantaneous. In general I give it the rule of 3 - 3 dates, then 3 times having sex but I'm not saying I wait until the 3rd date to have sex because we're adults and whenever it happens it happens. 1st date you get to know each other, 2nd date you see where you're at, and 3rd date you're either still interested or not. Same thing with sex really - 1st time you're getting to know each other, 2nd time you're finding the groove, then 3rd time it's either good or it's not. I'm almost 25 so one night stands along with being promiscuous are still fun and all but not in the same way as when I was 18. Knowing what I know now, if I come across a girl who's super rad in all ways I'd definitely try to hang on to her. 

[DISTANT RUMOURS]

Worst one:

Dated this girl for like 11 months to a year. Things went pretty smooth. At least i thought so.
She always said she had stuff to do during the week and she only made time for me in the weekends. I was head over heels in love so little did i know she was texting and messaging with other dudes constantly... I learned that afterwards.

I bought her tons of stuff, took her places, had fun...  But It was never good enough. She was always looking for attention with older dudes.
And eventually she dumped me for being 'too sweet'.

I was in my final year in college and I was in my last exams.

I was a wreck... Two weeks lafter she dumped me she called me again. she wanted to meet me. I gave in. Met her, and started talking. we had a fun afternoon and eventually it led to some make up sex. i went home, kissed her goodbey and was superhappy she was my girl again.


Later that day, The evening right before my hardest exam i got a phonecall from her. I heard laughter and moaning... it was her and a dude.

It was her while she was having sex with my 'best' friend.

How fucked up is that?