Oh fuck yes, I was looking for this thread for a minute the other night. Could not find it for some reason. Here it is!
There's never any shame with having a hard time verbalizing mental illness and / or mental health problems. It's really fucking difficult. The nature of it is that it tries to contain itself, while simultaneously begging to be heard. It really is a crushing intersection of feelings.
But I believe in you all! Today is not so bad for me, but I have what's called Schizotypal Personality-Disorder. Every day is a lottery of whether my symptoms will be terrible or... bearable. But I like to say it's all about getting through one Okay at a time. All it takes is one Okay, and then it's on to the next!
I failed more times than I'd like to admit, trying to get the help I needed. I had at least 5 therapists, all of whom I abandoned one by one. I just wasn't ready for
years.
This year was my breaking point. I decided to get a psychological evaluation. I knew I was ready. Financial strain aside, it saved my life (that plus falling in love shortly thereafter, which by no means was mere coincidence
).
I have no idea what I'm getting at - but I just want to say, do what you can to stay safe. Everything else will work out in time. Your heart will alert you when it's ready. May we all have luck on our side, and the right people around to listen. At least here, the shalomies have your backs!
Mental illness fucking sucks. Nothing but shaloms to you all
It takes such beautiful courage to open up about pain. May the same beauty reflect right back at you!