Awkward Situations at the Skatepark

[DISTANT RUMOURS]

Rolled up to skatepark yesterday, and a bunch of young dudes/skaters were smoking weed.
I could smell that from 50 meters away.

I'm decked out in white janoskis, grey chino's, nike sweater and roll up in a legit zet-up.
I thought I was looking fresh.

One of a sudden I hear one of the kids say: "put it away, put it away! He's a narc!"

The fuck man ...

*shaking my head*

[Hinna]

why urinate on a car because they didnt want to be in some random obviously kooky interview by a dude who doesnt skate. thats fkn weird even for camaraderies sake

[ibuproficient]

Telling the cerebral palsy kid’s Mom that he really can’t drive his RC car around the park for 30 mins.

[norcalnobody]

I was skating at this park 30 min north of my house where the rich suburban stoner kids can be a bit vibey. The park has a decent tranny flow to it but not really that much street. I guess i was being too much of a try hard trying to front side grind and air the shit out of the 5ft quarter pipe that I kinda kooked myself. A couple days later I notice someone keyed a fat cock on the hood of the car I was driving. I'm pretty sure it was those punk ass bitches from that park and I still haven't figured out a way to get my revenge. The cock they drew was pretty big and i just try to view it as a self portrait of my own wang and that they were just hinting to the fact that I am the most ballsy skater with again the largest wang.

[beandemon]

Politely let some young kids and their grandma cut across the road a block from the park. By the time I got out of the car, the kids are using the mini- best feature of the park - as a slide. Couldn’t go Jekyll and Hyde so I hit the adjacent curb for a while instead. Turned out fine as I heard later the mini had been really dusty and slick, but it was freshly wiped down by the little scamps’ sliding when I hit it after they left.

[nickpaolucci]

My friend texts me to come to the skatepark dude never skated but I’m like fuck it let’s teach him in the hockey rink behind the park. I pull up the mfer has a dslr and a tripod just starts filming randoms and tells me it’s for a school project lmfao when he asked some dude for a interview and he said “really? Really? No.” Highly awkward but i did piss on his Hyundai afterwards and call him stinky so we’re even ig.
edit: pissed on the dudes who declined the interviews car. I’m not cockbag lol

no, no. you are indeed cockbag.

[pamier]

Expand Quote

My friend texts me to come to the skatepark dude never skated but I’m like fuck it let’s teach him in the hockey rink behind the park. I pull up the mfer has a dslr and a tripod just starts filming randoms and tells me it’s for a school project lmfao when he asked some dude for a interview and he said “really? Really? No.” Highly awkward but i did piss on his Hyundai afterwards and call him stinky so we’re even ig.
edit: pissed on the dudes who declined the interviews car. I’m not cockbag lol

[close]

no, no. you are indeed cockbag.

I apologize for peeing on your car

[lampshade]

Expand Quote

My friend texts me to come to the skatepark dude never skated but I’m like fuck it let’s teach him in the hockey rink behind the park. I pull up the mfer has a dslr and a tripod just starts filming randoms and tells me it’s for a school project lmfao when he asked some dude for a interview and he said “really? Really? No.” Highly awkward but i did piss on his Hyundai afterwards and call him stinky so we’re even ig.
edit: pissed on the dudes who declined the interviews car. I’m not cockbag lol

[close]

no, no. you are indeed cockbag.

Is, "Cockbag" an insult or a compliment?

[Blueabyssofthisss]

When some random you’ve never even seen before asks to skate your board and you just flatly say no. It’s like they never expect you to say no, so it becomes a watch someone die inside moment.

[lampshade]

When some random you’ve never even seen before asks to skate your board and you just flatly say no. It’s like they never expect you to say no, so it becomes a watch someone die inside moment.

That's the worst.  It's always someone with filthy, muddy shoes and then they tell you how they used to be able to kickflip.

[GGK42069]

When some random you’ve never even seen before asks to skate your board and you just flatly say no. It’s like they never expect you to say no, so it becomes a watch someone die inside moment.

Wasn't at the park but some dude did this to me at the bar the other day. Didn't have the heart to say no, but watching him flail pathetically while getting dirty looks from the entire place felt just as bad. 100% felt like a kook by accessory when he finally gave up and passed me back my board

[ChuckRamone]

I always get awkward and shy after the cool ripper talks to me.

[pro club blanks]

It bums me out that people assume I smoke cigarettes and ask me for one when I dont

[lazlo_panaflex]

My old local had this shitty metal fun box we'd all huck over. I went down one afternoon and there's a few skaters and one dude tooling around on his old, crappy BMX. He had a friend who was sitting on top of a quarter pipe who just heckled everyone. Dudes would slam and he'd yell "you suck hahahaha" and sip his beer. Then he started in on his mate. Telling him to go higher and do big airs and to jump over the fun box. His mate wasn't that skilled and kept palming him off so the drunk dude climbed down, grabbed the bike and said "I'll fucken show you how it's done" He just started fanging towards the funbox which was only about 4ft high. Like, absolutely belting towards this thing. He launched so high I thought I was watching a reenactment of that scene in ET when all the kids take off into the sky on their bikes. He was literally, I dunno, 15ft in the air. I've never seen anyone get so high. Of course, at that speed he completely overshot the other side of the box and plummeted to the flat ground upon which his bike exploded. It didn't break. Shit went everywhere. Wheels in opposite directions, the frame crumpled and the handlbars collapsed. It was like watching a cartoon. Guy broke his leg and impaled himself on the gooseneck. An ambulance was called and the whole time we just rolled around this broken dude. Guy who owned the bike spent the 20 minutes waiting for the ambulance just ragging on him for breaking his precious BMX. Fun times. 

[Jewel Runner]

My old local had this shitty metal fun box we'd all huck over. I went down one afternoon and there's a few skaters and one dude tooling around on his old, crappy BMX. He had a friend who was sitting on top of a quarter pipe who just heckled everyone. Dudes would slam and he'd yell "you suck hahahaha" and sip his beer. Then he started in on his mate. Telling him to go higher and do big airs and to jump over the fun box. His mate wasn't that skilled and kept palming him off so the drunk dude climbed down, grabbed the bike and said "I'll fucken show you how it's done" He just started fanging towards the funbox which was only about 4ft high. Like, absolutely belting towards this thing. He launched so high I thought I was watching a reenactment of that scene in ET when all the kids take off into the sky on their bikes. He was literally, I dunno, 15ft in the air. I've never seen anyone get so high. Of course, at that speed he completely overshot the other side of the box and plummeted to the flat ground upon which his bike exploded. It didn't break. Shit went everywhere. Wheels in opposite directions, the frame crumpled and the handlbars collapsed. It was like watching a cartoon. Guy broke his leg and impaled himself on the gooseneck. An ambulance was called and the whole time we just rolled around this broken dude. Guy who owned the bike spent the 20 minutes waiting for the ambulance just ragging on him for breaking his precious BMX. Fun times.

Dude that's amazing! I love it when entitled pricks get their dosage of karma

[Blueabyssofthisss]

This kid who’s notorious for cool guying showed up one day and he’s skating by the benches where everyone sits, dapping everyone up and saying hi. “Hey x, hey blueabyss, hey y” then he gets to my friend who he doesn’t know. My friend says hi, extends the fist bump, and starts to introduce himself but this kid rudely cuts him off and says “I don’t know you” as he skates off. Immediately he lost his balance and face planted in to muddiest puddle you could imagine. Board and all completely soaked and caked with mud.

That same skatepark has a lot of sewage entrances. Sometimes it gets all backed up from the rain so shit streams and lakes start to form around the park. Whole park smells like Greely x 10 when that happens. Anyway, it’s sad because inevitably some little kid always thinks they can ride through the puddle and they end up slamming hard as fuck in to the shit water.

[Youoverthere]

This kid who’s notorious for cool guying showed up one day and he’s skating by the benches where everyone sits, dapping everyone up and saying hi. “Hey x, hey blueabyss, hey y” then he gets to my friend who he doesn’t know. My friend says hi, extends the fist bump, and starts to introduce himself but this kid rudely cuts him off and says “I don’t know you” as he skates off. Immediately he lost his balance and face planted in to muddiest puddle you could imagine. Board and all completely soaked and caked with mud.

That same skatepark has a lot of sewage entrances. Sometimes it gets all backed up from the rain so shit streams and lakes start to form around the park. Whole park smells like Greely x 10 when that happens. Anyway, it’s sad because inevitably some little kid always thinks they can ride through the puddle and they end up slamming hard as fuck in to the shit water.

are you from Colorado?

[Blueabyssofthisss]

Expand Quote

This kid who’s notorious for cool guying showed up one day and he’s skating by the benches where everyone sits, dapping everyone up and saying hi. “Hey x, hey blueabyss, hey y” then he gets to my friend who he doesn’t know. My friend says hi, extends the fist bump, and starts to introduce himself but this kid rudely cuts him off and says “I don’t know you” as he skates off. Immediately he lost his balance and face planted in to muddiest puddle you could imagine. Board and all completely soaked and caked with mud.

That same skatepark has a lot of sewage entrances. Sometimes it gets all backed up from the rain so shit streams and lakes start to form around the park. Whole park smells like Greely x 10 when that happens. Anyway, it’s sad because inevitably some little kid always thinks they can ride through the puddle and they end up slamming hard as fuck in to the shit water.

[close]

are you from Colorado?

CA, but I’ve spent most of my time in AZ and CO

[Jewel Runner]

This kid who’s notorious for cool guying showed up one day and he’s skating by the benches where everyone sits, dapping everyone up and saying hi. “Hey x, hey blueabyss, hey y” then he gets to my friend who he doesn’t know. My friend says hi, extends the fist bump, and starts to introduce himself but this kid rudely cuts him off and says “I don’t know you” as he skates off. Immediately he lost his balance and face planted in to muddiest puddle you could imagine. Board and all completely soaked and caked with mud.

That same skatepark has a lot of sewage entrances. Sometimes it gets all backed up from the rain so shit streams and lakes start to form around the park. Whole park smells like Greely x 10 when that happens. Anyway, it’s sad because inevitably some little kid always thinks they can ride through the puddle and they end up slamming hard as fuck in to the shit water.

Sweet! More instant karma! He deserved it tho

That shit fuels me lol

[pamier]

This kid who’s notorious for cool guying showed up one day and he’s skating by the benches where everyone sits, dapping everyone up and saying hi. “Hey x, hey blueabyss, hey y” then he gets to my friend who he doesn’t know. My friend says hi, extends the fist bump, and starts to introduce himself but this kid rudely cuts him off and says “I don’t know you” as he skates off. Immediately he lost his balance and face planted in to muddiest puddle you could imagine. Board and all completely soaked and caked with mud.

That same skatepark has a lot of sewage entrances. Sometimes it gets all backed up from the rain so shit streams and lakes start to form around the park. Whole park smells like Greely x 10 when that happens. Anyway, it’s sad because inevitably some little kid always thinks they can ride through the puddle and they end up slamming hard as fuck in to the shit water.

I always read ppl talking abt ppl getting cool guyed at locals but never see it happening irl. I think it happens at more popular spots or the opposite of small town upper middle class type places because people aren’t as welcoming at these types of places. If someone pulled that shit at our diy we’d pee on their car.

[american.worm]

damn ass green 2012 kia optima. wanna save it and piss on it?

[ok boomer]

that's me at 0:48

 

[Jewel Runner]

that's me at 0:48

 

Now THAT is an awkward situation at the park

The whole thing

[throwaway187]

A group of kids on bikes (maybe 11 to 14 years old) proclaimed it was their park now and they will ride whenever and however they like. I can share but then you roll in on me, I'm going to explain I like to use the deep and shallow in the same run and you have to wait. Needless to say, they told me to fuck off and continued deliberately cutting everyone off.  So I let the air out of one of their bike tires. They called me a 'tweaker' and threatened to get their dad. I welcomed the threat. Anyway, I felt a little awkward being a middle aged man letting air out of kids' bike tries... but you can't punch kids these days...

  I've had a young kid at the park try to physically fight me and I knew I couldn't punch him so I spit in his face. Still assault bit I thought it was the lesser evil of the 2.

[dofrenzy]

that's me at 0:48

LOL….nice!  It was fun waiting for 0:48 and wondering if you would be a skater or a twerker.  Well done!

[PuffinMuffin]

Roll into the park, immediately a 12-year-old on a BMX bike yells "DO A KICKFLIP!" followed by "JUMP OVER MY BIKE!". I don't, he proceeds to ride his bike right behind me, he runs his front tire into my ankle. I'm bleeding profusely. 

I inform him I had a rough day at work and just want to be left alone. He follows that up with something along the lines of "you work? how old are you", "33". He then starts yelling to his scooter friends across the park that the "GIRL IS 33!". Then he tells me he never saw a girl sweat as much as I do.

I sit down at the bench and pretend to be on my phone while waiting for him to leave. He comes over, grabs a gallon of water, and pours it all over his body. He proceeds to slowly take off his shirt while maintaining eye contact. He asks if he looked sexy. I literally can't anymore and dip.

[cky enthusiast]

Expand Quote

A group of kids on bikes (maybe 11 to 14 years old) proclaimed it was their park now and they will ride whenever and however they like. I can share but then you roll in on me, I'm going to explain I like to use the deep and shallow in the same run and you have to wait. Needless to say, they told me to fuck off and continued deliberately cutting everyone off.  So I let the air out of one of their bike tires. They called me a 'tweaker' and threatened to get their dad. I welcomed the threat. Anyway, I felt a little awkward being a middle aged man letting air out of kids' bike tries... but you can't punch kids these days...

[close]

  I've had a young kid at the park try to physically fight me and I knew I couldn't punch him so I spit in his face. Still assault bit I thought it was the lesser evil of the 2.

grown men threatening children is definitely awkward

[throwaway187]

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

A group of kids on bikes (maybe 11 to 14 years old) proclaimed it was their park now and they will ride whenever and however they like. I can share but then you roll in on me, I'm going to explain I like to use the deep and shallow in the same run and you have to wait. Needless to say, they told me to fuck off and continued deliberately cutting everyone off.  So I let the air out of one of their bike tires. They called me a 'tweaker' and threatened to get their dad. I welcomed the threat. Anyway, I felt a little awkward being a middle aged man letting air out of kids' bike tries... but you can't punch kids these days...

[close]

  I've had a young kid at the park try to physically fight me and I knew I couldn't punch him so I spit in his face. Still assault bit I thought it was the lesser evil of the 2.

[close]

grown men threatening children is definitely awkward

  (If this was directed towards me.) Thing is I came into the park these 2 brothers were known for being big troublemakers and were kicked out of a lot of the skate related programs in the city. Anyways I was hurt so I was out for a bit came into the park and they started antagonizing me heavily. I didn't do anything but stand there and just let them verbally berate me as much as possible and trust me these kids were evil. I guess something inside me snapped obviously but I knew I couldn't punch the kid in the face so I resorted to spitting. End of story. I never provoked them but this is slap and everyone assumes whatever negative outcome there is to any situation is the best so I'm not surprised you thought I was antagonizing them.

[DaleSr]

Roll into the park, immediately a 12-year-old on a BMX bike yells "DO A KICKFLIP!" followed by "JUMP OVER MY BIKE!". I don't, he proceeds to ride his bike right behind me, he runs his front tire into my ankle. I'm bleeding profusely. 

I inform him I had a rough day at work and just want to be left alone. He follows that up with something along the lines of "you work? how old are you", "33". He then starts yelling to his scooter friends across the park that the "GIRL IS 33!". Then he tells me he never saw a girl sweat as much as I do.

I sit down at the bench and pretend to be on my phone while waiting for him to leave. He comes over, grabs a gallon of water, and pours it all over his body. He proceeds to slowly take off his shirt while maintaining eye contact. He asks if he looked sexy. I literally can't anymore and dip.

When children try to be "sexy" to impress a girl, hilarity always ensures.

"Uhhhhh shit what do girls like... I've seen a polo Cologne commercial... All the dudes in those are wet or getting out of a pool.... I'VE GOT IT! I'LL JUST DUMP A BUNCH OF WATER ON MY HEAD!"

Expand Quote

A group of kids on bikes (maybe 11 to 14 years old) proclaimed it was their park now and they will ride whenever and however they like. I can share but then you roll in on me, I'm going to explain I like to use the deep and shallow in the same run and you have to wait. Needless to say, they told me to fuck off and continued deliberately cutting everyone off.  So I let the air out of one of their bike tires. They called me a 'tweaker' and threatened to get their dad. I welcomed the threat. Anyway, I felt a little awkward being a middle aged man letting air out of kids' bike tries... but you can't punch kids these days...

[close]

  I've had a young kid at the park try to physically fight me and I knew I couldn't punch him so I spit in his face. Still assault bit I thought it was the lesser evil of the 2.

Also the kids in your area seem intense. All the kids around here will be annoying but you just gotta dad voice them and they'll cut that shit out.

I remember a year ago when the fires were starting up again around here in California, some kids had lit a pizza box on fire in the park and me and my homies had to go dad mode on them and stomp out their fire and yell at them about how fucking stupid it is to start a fire at the skatepark, ESPECIALLY when the rest of the state is on fire or about to catch on fire.

[JANUS]

Then he tells me he never saw a girl sweat as much as I do.

Best pickup line ever.