Weird Stories About Pros

[GreggPopovich]

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

He kept one of my friends back, the one who invited us and was told to “Bring Chicks”, and proceeded to give a lap dance. We watched through the curtains until Heath stared at us and closed them so quick. We hung out in the hall way for a while after that.

[close]

Yo did one of your homies give heath a fucking lap dance??

[close]

Heath gave my friend the Lap Dance

[close]

He reminds me of the most power bottom of power bottoms, like he would rip your cock off and own u kind of shit. Straight up the vibes I got, like you know this dude is like a masochistic perfectionist to the nth degree on the gnarliest shit in the world, it just makes too much sense. straight up the vibes I have gotten since this experience, and after. Like that look you just get from another man that's like I want this stud to fuck me in the ass and I'm gonna own that shit like riding fucking el toro.

[close]

How horny were you when you wrote this post

Tell us about your boner

[close]

gnar

[close]

Nah, just a weird story. The whole day was fucking strange in general. I met Dill for the first time that day completely unrelated in a completely different place like 12 hours prior. It was out of nowhere too, like of all the times to run into Dill it was that day on the complete opposite side of Los Angeles.

Either way I had seen Heath in passing before. We never said anything to each other, except the occasional nod of affirmation like one guy in here mentioned he does. He's like this fucking modern western gay cowboy of skating. Like he fucking ghosts out at demos and wear's like straw hats and shit, ghosting like a mid life dad, but instead of the new balances and jorts, he's like a fucking urban cowboy, some Clint Eastwood shit. like if you guys have had any experiences with this character, all of this information on here is making me laugh my fucking ass off.

The funniest thing about this, is the day I'm recalling, which was my last time I saw heath, he was not ghosting out in like his old usual swagger. I'll just mention he had a feminine appeal.

[close]

If Heath is trans I'll be so stoked.

He’s already the coolest skateboarder that has prolly ever existed. It Heath ended up being trans or like a gay cowboy, which is such a plausible thing. He would become like folk lore at that point, like just a mythical hero in the history of skateboarding like animal chin or some shit.

Like when Heath gives u the nod, which one time I was skating for 30 minutes with Heath watching and I didn’t know, and I skate away and see him, my eyes catching his, and he gives me the nod. It’s like u almost like shit yourself. Like I’ve been around basically fucking everyone at some point or another whether they knew it or not, like the fucking Beyonder in Spider-Man, some real Forrest Gump shit. I can tell you this right now after meeting and talking with nearly everyone, that he is by far the most mythical strange figure in the entire industry I’ve ever fucking met and it’s not even close, and if he gives you the nod it’s some shit u will remember for the rest of your fucking life as one of the greatest compliments u ever received.

[RichardBarkley]

i guess i'll tell my Heath story. prob posted it in some thread at some point but its fun to revisit.

back in ~2007 they were doing the wild ride tour and i went to the demo a couple hours away in some really random small town. shitty indoor park, they probably hated it. lucky for heath they had a snowboard jump and he did a back 360 nosegrab. so sick. it was one of those awful indoor parks with ramps that seemed designed for skaters, rollerbladers and bmxer's all at once. you can probably picture it. after the demo we got word that they would be camping at the campground in my city and the invite was open for people to come have a good time.

at the campground, heath was just sitting on the bumper of a rental car with the trunk open and pounding the case of budweiser he had next to him. me and a couple friends are talking to him and cant believe how normal and nice he is. a lot of the other guys are raging and hes just relaxing. i had no choice but to tell him that his Sight Unseen part was the best thing ever, and he talked about how that was the best compliment he could receive since he worked so hard on that.

the following day i decided to drive another couple hours to the next demo by myself. i was 20, had the day off, and an emerica demo was pretty rare. when i got to the shopping center with the park, both heath and reynolds showed up like 30 minutes before the huge bike squad. i was standing outside the little coffee shop and heath comes up and starts talking to me. wow, he remembered me! we talked for a few and he asked me about the park and then said he was going to go inside to check it out. he comes out and says "im not skating this fucking park" or something along those lines - it was another small indoor park. hes eating a reeses cup (2-pack not the king size) and he says "want a reeses cup?". i wasn't going to eat half his snack but i'll always remember the offer lol.

also - when the demo started he DID skate. he rode up the bank, tried a kickflip and landed as hard as he could with one foot in the middle to snap his board and left. 15 seconds tops. very on brand.

Lol

VERY on brand.

Amazing

[DaleSr]

Heath is our gay samurai, going from demo to demo giving out nods, lap dances and focusing boards.

[skate_bored]

Heath is our gay samurai, going from demo to demo giving out nods, lap dances and focusing boards.

and reeses cups

[jgonzalez]

This is now the “when Heath hit on me” thread

[GreggPopovich]

Expand Quote

Heath is our gay samurai, going from demo to demo giving out nods, lap dances and focusing boards.

[close]

and reeses cups

Someone with photoshop skills make heaths face from something on a Rurouni Kenshin body, and make it like super gay like the South Park tweak and Craig episode. Shit would be epically cool, and I know one of you fuckers can do it.

[Croquet temper]

I hope Heath Kirchart sees this thread and is disappointed in all of you.

[GreggPopovich]

I hope Heath Kirchart sees this thread and is disappointed in all of you.

1. I don’t think Heath is homophobic even
If not gay, so I don’t think he would give a fuck.
2. He created himself into a mythical figure
regardless of the outcome, so I think he would be stoked people are hyped on him, even queer people.
3. I hope his girlfriend sees the thread and prints out some gay Heath art if it can happen, and posts it to their fridge for the wholesome ending slap deserves.

[pugmaster]

Shinda shima would be a pretty awesome soundtrack to a hardcore gay/trans porn scene now that I think about it.

Close up on initial penetration/make out in slow motion when the song goes BLEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR at :16.

[Mr Cheese Resurrection]

Jack Mehoff is a weirdo, he tells weird stories about other pros. And there’s a lot of crazy stories about him. But I’ve never heard any of the stories about Jack Mehoff. Only like 2 people know about them. I don’t know who those people are. Matter of fact I don’t think anybody does. I’m going to do some research to figure out the crazy stories. But it’s really hard to find. So the research might take some time. I have a lot of time on my hands though, so I might as well get to work. The score of the Suns vs Lakers game is 44-45 Suns with 3:17 left in the Second quarter.

[conqueso]

nice work cheetah you ruined another great thread

[Eric Dolphy]

Expand Quote

Heath is our gay samurai, going from demo to demo giving out nods, lap dances and focusing boards.

[close]

and reeses cups

Now I'm not necessarily endorsing the Gay Heath theory BUT i could totally imagine how offering someone your reeses cup could be taken as a signal that you're cruising

[Christmas Complete]

nice work cheetah you ruined another great thread

Let's try to get back on track.

On the sidewalk in Ybor City after Tampa pro in 1999, I saw Mic-E Reyes had Josh Kalis scooted on his butt back in a doorway yelling at him and kicking him. I drunkenly said "Hey, why don't you pick on someone your own size." (don't know why I said that, I was super faded and definitely didn't mean me). I don't think he heard me, thank god, but Josh said, "Ayo, mind your own! Mind your own!" so I did. Mic-E is a meanie.

[ok boomer]

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

Heath is our gay samurai, going from demo to demo giving out nods, lap dances and focusing boards.

[close]

and reeses cups

[close]

Now I'm not necessarily endorsing the Gay Heath theory BUT i could totally imagine how offering someone your reeses cup could be taken as a signal that you're cruising

I tend to stock a bit of Reese in my office at work and offer them (which is a pump fake, I don't want to share them really, people know I have them so I bluff the offer to be nice!) to everyone. Thus far, it has not come across as cruising. Will let you know if it changes!

[Bigpantssmallwheelz]

hmmm well im from minneapolis . ( rip henry) and at the time i was living in san jose ca around 2013 -2014ish. I use to go to this punk rock skate bar called cinebar. The enjoi mansion was right down the street . so id see alot of enjoi guys in there . One time i saw someone wearing a familia beanie ( skate shop here in mpls owned by steve nesser ) i was like , "yo whered you get that beanie" , dude looked startled and was like i skate , i got it in minneapolis. Talked for a couple minutes then parted ways. Only did i realize later that it was ben raemers. About 2 weeks later after bars closed around 3 in the morning i was stumbling to jack in the box right next to La vics taqueria ( if ya know then ya know ) but there was ben, shitfaced . Alone and by himself , I tried saying hey , but he was too far gone , faded wise . I moved back to minnesota a couple years later , and then he died . its not that weird of a story, but pretty sad . Here i am a midwestern kid living in cali , skating , smoking living the dream, and to see him like that . I think about it alot . And then henry happened ;(

I LOVE YOU ALL.

[jgonzalez]

If I had a dollar for every time a dude from Minnesota said “cali”

[Bigpantssmallwheelz]

Hey sometimes I get lazy . Plus I had to type that response rather quickly lol. Only time I heard someone in california call it cali were cholos lol

[Bigpantssmallwheelz]

Unless you are nyjah or another huge star, most do sell their sponsered products. How do you think most skaters in the 80s and 90s were getting by? Hardly any money in it at that time.

Expand Quote

I was drunk in an NYC bar at like 2 in the morning one time and Clark Hassler randomly walked up to me and tried to sell me a board for 10 bucks. It was a Zero board.

[close]

I bought a lightly used Toy Machine deck off Billy Marks back in the day, I think I paid $20. He had a bit of a reputation for selling his sponsors product

[Miller92]

this was 2018

at a premiere with the Volcom team.  Provost, Daan, Omar Hassan, Ant, Alec Majerus, blah blah

Provost wouldn't quit bothering me to find him coke

the man is literally insufferable when he's drunk

Daan kept walking up to my face and yelling "highway toooo the twilight zone!" (which i think he meant "danger zone" but whatever)

then puked all over the place

These dudes partied HARD...then woke up the next morning and skated all day incredibly well.

not sure how that's possible at 27 but they do it somehow

[RichardBarkley]

this was 2018

at a premiere with the Volcom team.  Provost, Daan, Omar Hassan, Ant, Alec Majerus, blah blah

Provost wouldn't quit bothering me to find him coke

the man is literally insufferable when he's drunk

Daan kept walking up to my face and yelling "highway toooo the twilight zone!" (which i think he meant "danger zone" but whatever)

then puked all over the place

These dudes partied HARD...then woke up the next morning and skated all day incredibly well.

not sure how that's possible at 27 but they do it somehow

Lol

[swishfrontblunt]

Growing up in Oregon my pro encounters were limited.. One time living in NW Portland I decided to cross the river and check out Burnside and some spots on the waterfront. I'm a few blocks out from the Burnside bridge on an empty industrial street when I notice another dude by himself skating towards me. I can tell from a distance the guy is extra juicy, bringing his leg up super high when he pushes, even stalling his push sometimes, hands doing interesting things, big ass black hoody on over some swagged out denim with that wierd ex-con looking rubber band trick that turns baggy pants into joggers, all tucked into some hightop dunks. It's not until he's about 10 feet away that I realize he's my then favorite skater, Brent Atchley. I give him my best Heath nod and maybe a timid wave as he passed, but I swear the dude just shook his head at me in disgust and kept high pushing. Maybe let out a "phhh" kinda noise. This is prime long hair Brent Atchley, when he was still on Element but Nike SB wasn't even a thing really.. hard to see a dude you look up to in the wild and they just diss you because they're so full of themselves / whatever.. I think I took a break from skating for a year or two after that, not necessarily because of this encounter but sub-conciously realizing your hero is a scrub could have had something to do with it.. Meanwhile Brent faded into a Penny-esque obscurity, and by the time I started skating again the dude had re-emerged full Urban Outfitters, with the poofy Cody Mac haircut and still somehow saggin skin tight white jeans, neon Element Footwear slip ons and push broom mustache w/ short shorts. His high push and pigeon toe stance looks forced as fuck now. Poor dude comes off more confused and insecure now then I was right after he dissed me, karma a bitch sometimes..

[RichardBarkley]

Growing up in Oregon my pro encounters were limited.. One time living in NW Portland I decided to cross the river and check out Burnside and some spots on the waterfront. I'm a few blocks out from the Burnside bridge on an empty industrial street when I notice another dude by himself skating towards me. I can tell from a distance the guy is extra juicy, bringing his leg up super high when he pushes, even stalling his push sometimes, hands doing interesting things, big ass black hoody on over some swagged out denim with that wierd ex-con looking rubber band trick that turns baggy pants into joggers, all tucked into some hightop dunks. It's not until he's about 10 feet away that I realize he's my then favorite skater, Brent Atchley. I give him my best Heath nod and maybe a timid wave as he passed, but I swear the dude just shook his head at me in disgust and kept high pushing. Maybe let out a "phhh" kinda noise. This is prime long hair Brent Atchley, when he was still on Element but Nike SB wasn't even a thing really.. hard to see a dude you look up to in the wild and they just diss you because they're so full of themselves / whatever.. I think I took a break from skating for a year or two after that, not necessarily because of this encounter but sub-conciously realizing your hero is a scrub could have had something to do with it.. Meanwhile Brent faded into a Penny-esque obscurity, and by the time I started skating again the dude had re-emerged full Urban Outfitters, with the poofy Cody Mac haircut and still somehow saggin skin tight white jeans, neon Element Footwear slip ons and push broom mustache w/ short shorts. His high push and pigeon toe stance looks forced as fuck now. Poor dude comes off more confused and insecure now then I was right after he dissed me, karma a bitch sometimes..

That's a shitty encounter sorry man.

On the plus side he has kooked himself royally

[friendly dave]

One time I saw Brent get the absolute shit beat out of him by one of the bovver boys, and this native american gang banger for calling my friends girlfriend a bitch.

[Pete]

Native American gangbanger.
Damn.



Free max b

[fs1/2cab]

Expand Quote

Growing up in Oregon my pro encounters were limited.. One time living in NW Portland I decided to cross the river and check out Burnside and some spots on the waterfront. I'm a few blocks out from the Burnside bridge on an empty industrial street when I notice another dude by himself skating towards me. I can tell from a distance the guy is extra juicy, bringing his leg up super high when he pushes, even stalling his push sometimes, hands doing interesting things, big ass black hoody on over some swagged out denim with that wierd ex-con looking rubber band trick that turns baggy pants into joggers, all tucked into some hightop dunks. It's not until he's about 10 feet away that I realize he's my then favorite skater, Brent Atchley. I give him my best Heath nod and maybe a timid wave as he passed, but I swear the dude just shook his head at me in disgust and kept high pushing. Maybe let out a "phhh" kinda noise. This is prime long hair Brent Atchley, when he was still on Element but Nike SB wasn't even a thing really.. hard to see a dude you look up to in the wild and they just diss you because they're so full of themselves / whatever.. I think I took a break from skating for a year or two after that, not necessarily because of this encounter but sub-conciously realizing your hero is a scrub could have had something to do with it.. Meanwhile Brent faded into a Penny-esque obscurity, and by the time I started skating again the dude had re-emerged full Urban Outfitters, with the poofy Cody Mac haircut and still somehow saggin skin tight white jeans, neon Element Footwear slip ons and push broom mustache w/ short shorts. His high push and pigeon toe stance looks forced as fuck now. Poor dude comes off more confused and insecure now then I was right after he dissed me, karma a bitch sometimes..

[close]

That's a shitty encounter sorry man.

On the plus side he has kooked himself royally

Care to elaborate?

[swishfrontblunt]

Clearly something went down, and I guess that's ultimately the only "weird" part of the story is that at the time he was a very influential skater and probably inspired everyone from dick rizzo to GT and oski, then went dark for a couple years only to resurface without sponsors, a pompadour and pastel poplin short shorts.. barely able to imitate his former self.

[Croquet temper]

The Brent Atchley parody made me spit coffee

[Miller92]

skating a blacktop parking lot with BA one time.

He stops after a couple tre flips and picks his board up and looks at me.

"we cant skate this blacktop!..."

I asked him why and he responded with, "Elissa always says if you skate blacktop it gives your wheels the black plague and you know what the black plague turns into? ....yellow fever! I hate yellow wheels!!"

and skated away.

he broke 3 custom gonz shaped boards that day doing flatground tre flips

I think about this story every time Im skating black top which we can all agree sucks ass

[swishfrontblunt]

The Brent Atchley parody made me spit coffee

A parody of his former self, the words I was looking for exactly, thank you

[RichardBarkley]

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

Growing up in Oregon my pro encounters were limited.. One time living in NW Portland I decided to cross the river and check out Burnside and some spots on the waterfront. I'm a few blocks out from the Burnside bridge on an empty industrial street when I notice another dude by himself skating towards me. I can tell from a distance the guy is extra juicy, bringing his leg up super high when he pushes, even stalling his push sometimes, hands doing interesting things, big ass black hoody on over some swagged out denim with that wierd ex-con looking rubber band trick that turns baggy pants into joggers, all tucked into some hightop dunks. It's not until he's about 10 feet away that I realize he's my then favorite skater, Brent Atchley. I give him my best Heath nod and maybe a timid wave as he passed, but I swear the dude just shook his head at me in disgust and kept high pushing. Maybe let out a "phhh" kinda noise. This is prime long hair Brent Atchley, when he was still on Element but Nike SB wasn't even a thing really.. hard to see a dude you look up to in the wild and they just diss you because they're so full of themselves / whatever.. I think I took a break from skating for a year or two after that, not necessarily because of this encounter but sub-conciously realizing your hero is a scrub could have had something to do with it.. Meanwhile Brent faded into a Penny-esque obscurity, and by the time I started skating again the dude had re-emerged full Urban Outfitters, with the poofy Cody Mac haircut and still somehow saggin skin tight white jeans, neon Element Footwear slip ons and push broom mustache w/ short shorts. His high push and pigeon toe stance looks forced as fuck now. Poor dude comes off more confused and insecure now then I was right after he dissed me, karma a bitch sometimes..

[close]

That's a shitty encounter sorry man.

On the plus side he has kooked himself royally

[close]

Care to elaborate?

His weird pompadour period