Awkward Sexual Experiences

[Wall of Nausea]

one time. my hand told me I couldn't have sex with it.... AWKWARD

[IanBZHD]

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girl ive been talking to for like 2 months wont make out with me, only closed mouth kiss. Thus, leading to nothing more then a few awkward kisses and no action.

has anyone had this happen? its like she has no desire what-so-ever to do anything.

and i've been around my fair share of loose women, but this is just weird.

[close]

Is she religious?
Is she a virgin?
Has she been fucked over in the past?
Is she twelve?

Serious note: Maybe she really likes you and wants to take things slow. I know that I have progressed slowly with physical emotions before if I am really happy about somebody and don't want to get things confused. Just play it cool though if you're psyched on her. Don't let it ALL rely on physical actions but don't let her just screw you over and play with you.

No
No
No
Not 12.

Im 21 btw, i guess at this age i just expect most ladies to be down for the cause or say fuck off. Not somewhere in between.

[Merked]

When i was 23, so 8 years ago, My buddies and i went out in a small city about an hour from where we are from. Get to the Bar/Club kinda deal and I'm already fucked out of my tree from drinking most of the day and the drive to the city. Get inside and the first girl i see is small and has short dark hair (my type) she grabs me and yep i got my night set. After more shots and beer we end up back at her place, she keeps telling me to be quiet and blah blah blah. Get to her room downstairs and go at it, she looks awesome naked so stoked at this point. Wake up to sober me and I'm pretty pumped on how cute this girl is but what the hell is all this noise up stairs. Ask her if that's her roommates, she tells me its her parents, at this point I'm bummed cause I hate dealing with parents of adults living at home. So I ask her if she's in university or just working, Nope she tells me she still in High School and got into the bar with a fake ID. At this point I'm fucking bummed at the situation and asking if there is another way out of this basement to avoid up stairs, plus how far away I am from anywhere I know and any other info I need. So long story short...have to go up stairs, sit at the kitchen table, eat breakfast with the Family, make up a lame excuse about how my buddies left me and your daughter found me and was nice enough to let me crash at this house. The Dad is eying me the whole time knowing I banged his 17 year old daughter, then the mom drives me to a spot in the city where my buddies could meet up with me as the house was located outside of the city and I had no clue where to go or how the fuck we even got to the house the night before.

Also with the girl I have been with for over 3 years now, we were banging after a drunk night out and I slipped up on a pump and entered her ass with out warning. She got up went to the bathroom and nearly passed the fuck out and was so white when she came out. She looked it up online and her body went into a state of shock, happens to some girls I guess.

You are a God amongst men.

[Carrolls Chesthairs]

Long time reader and  first time poster for this thread (I think)

In high school/college I was in a relationship with this girl I went to high school with. One night I get home wasted and she comes over drunk as well. We start hooking up on the side of my house and she starts giving me an old fashioned. Bored, drunk, and starting to get a hurt penis from incorrect handling, I calmly said, "It's easier if you put your mouth on it." With little hesitation she starts going down on me. This being her first time, I was kind of blown away at how willing she was. Time passes and she is blowing me on my back patio in the middle of the night. I start getting bored AGAIN because she is awful at this as well. In result, I rub one out and she rubs my back. Looking back now it is really weird that it resulted in this but oh well.

Fast forward a few years and I have still not gotten a successful BJ. After seeing several other girls through out the years, many have claimed they're, "..really good at giving head." All of which were failures.. till recently. I started seeing this girl I met through a friend. We hook up twice and I got freaked out when she went down on me. Close to explosion and nervous about ruining her sheets/reputation with me, I went to the bathroom. After explaining my history with BJs she understands and expresses sympathy for me being lets say.. genetically different. Progressively we start boning and mid-way through she says she has to stop because I'm hurting her.

[skate_bored]

Long time reader and  first time poster for this thread (I think)

In high school/college I was in a relationship with this girl I went to high school with. One night I get home wasted and she comes over drunk as well. We start hooking up on the side of my house and she starts giving me an old fashioned. Bored, drunk, and starting to get a hurt penis from incorrect handling, I calmly said, "It's easier if you put your mouth on it." With little hesitation she starts going down on me. This being her first time, I was kind of blown away at how willing she was. Time passes and she is blowing me on my back patio in the middle of the night. I start getting bored AGAIN because she is awful at this as well. In result, I rub one out and she rubs my back. Looking back now it is really weird that it resulted in this but oh well.

Fast forward a few years and I have still not gotten a successful BJ. After seeing several other girls through out the years, many have claimed they're, "..really good at giving head." All of which were failures.. till recently. I started seeing this girl I met through a friend. We hook up twice and I got freaked out when she went down on me. Close to explosion and nervous about ruining her sheets/reputation with me, I went to the bathroom. After explaining my history with BJs she understands and expresses sympathy for me being lets say.. genetically different. Progressively we start boning and mid-way through she says she has to stop because I'm hurting her.

so the problem im gathering is you have trouble getting off from a blow job? its tough man, especially as a chronic masturbator. I think that you have to dedicate some time to training one girl to do exactly what you want.

[69]

Long time reader and?  first time poster for this thread (I think)

In high school/college I was in a relationship with this girl I went to high school with. One night I get home wasted and she comes over drunk as well. We start hooking up on the side of my house and she starts giving me an old fashioned. Bored, drunk, and starting to get a hurt penis from incorrect handling, I calmly said, "It's easier if you put your mouth on it." With little hesitation she starts going down on me. This being her first time, I was kind of blown away at how willing she was. Time passes and she is blowing me on my back patio in the middle of the night. I start getting bored AGAIN because she is awful at this as well. In result, I rub one out and she rubs my back. Looking back now it is really weird that it resulted in this but oh well.

Fast forward a few years and I have still not gotten a successful BJ. After seeing several other girls through out the years, many have claimed they're, "..really good at giving head." All of which were failures.. till recently. I started seeing this girl I met through a friend. We hook up twice and I got freaked out when she went down on me. Close to explosion and nervous about ruining her sheets/reputation with me, I went to the bathroom. After explaining my history with BJs she understands and expresses sympathy for me being lets say.. genetically different. Progressively we start boning and mid-way through she says she has to stop because I'm hurting her.

bad story

[sexualhelon]

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Long time reader and� first time poster for this thread (I think)

In high school/college I was in a relationship with this girl I went to high school with. One night I get home wasted and she comes over drunk as well. We start hooking up on the side of my house and she starts giving me an old fashioned. Bored, drunk, and starting to get a hurt penis from incorrect handling, I calmly said, "It's easier if you put your mouth on it." With little hesitation she starts going down on me. This being her first time, I was kind of blown away at how willing she was. Time passes and she is blowing me on my back patio in the middle of the night. I start getting bored AGAIN because she is awful at this as well. In result, I rub one out and she rubs my back. Looking back now it is really weird that it resulted in this but oh well.

Fast forward a few years and I have still not gotten a successful BJ. After seeing several other girls through out the years, many have claimed they're, "..really good at giving head." All of which were failures.. till recently. I started seeing this girl I met through a friend. We hook up twice and I got freaked out when she went down on me. Close to explosion and nervous about ruining her sheets/reputation with me, I went to the bathroom. After explaining my history with BJs she understands and expresses sympathy for me being lets say.. genetically different. Progressively we start boning and mid-way through she says she has to stop because I'm hurting her.

[close]

so the problem im gathering is you have trouble getting off from a blow job? its tough man, especially as a chronic masturbator. I think that you have to dedicate some time to training one girl to do exactly what you want.

I know what you mean, man. I think the thing is that no one knows how to treat themself better than themself right? But obviously you can't suck your own dick. Trust me, there are girls who get that shit right and then some where you just have to lay there psyching yourself out with the fact that your dick is in some girls mouth. I'm older, been there done that with most sexual encounters, and the odds of pushing the boundaries on a one night stand are slim. It helps out tons for me if I didn't jerk off the night before - we're talking the difference in being the energizer bunny and cumming fairly easily but still lasting a bit. What sucks is when you stop yourself to keep going then it fucks you up.

[GarglesCmen]

I was going in to penetrate this one girl and I full on shoved my dick into the mattress pretty hard and passed out on my bed. One of the worst nights of my life.

[Tracer]

Next thing im boner up screaming HEELP amongst 40-50 people searching for her best friend

[steve]

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Long time reader and  first time poster for this thread (I think)

In high school/college I was in a relationship with this girl I went to high school with. One night I get home wasted and she comes over drunk as well. We start hooking up on the side of my house and she starts giving me an old fashioned. Bored, drunk, and starting to get a hurt penis from incorrect handling, I calmly said, "It's easier if you put your mouth on it." With little hesitation she starts going down on me. This being her first time, I was kind of blown away at how willing she was. Time passes and she is blowing me on my back patio in the middle of the night. I start getting bored AGAIN because she is awful at this as well. In result, I rub one out and she rubs my back. Looking back now it is really weird that it resulted in this but oh well.

Fast forward a few years and I have still not gotten a successful BJ. After seeing several other girls through out the years, many have claimed they're, "..really good at giving head." All of which were failures.. till recently. I started seeing this girl I met through a friend. We hook up twice and I got freaked out when she went down on me. Close to explosion and nervous about ruining her sheets/reputation with me, I went to the bathroom. After explaining my history with BJs she understands and expresses sympathy for me being lets say.. genetically different. Progressively we start boning and mid-way through she says she has to stop because I'm hurting her.

[close]

so the problem im gathering is you have trouble getting off from a blow job? its tough man, especially as a chronic masturbator. I think that you have to dedicate some time to training one girl to do exactly what you want.

i've only had a few good ones, in a relative sense. i'd rather j.o. onto some boobs most of the time. unless, that is, if i'm driving.

[Dole]

Yeah I got couple of awkward moments of those kind. In high school I was at bar and hooked up with this chick from my school. She was like a straight A- student but had also a nice body and all. I got pretty hammered and at some point she asked if i would come to her place. It was a fucking long walk (at least it felt like it) but the idea of getting laid kept me going. Finally at her's and i'm having the greatest urge to take shit. It was this little ass apartment with one room and paper-thin walls and my ass is exploding. I didn't want to ruin the sure to come fucking so i tried to put the water running and all but it was terrible (she didn't even have a stereo or some). I couldn't take a proper shit because she was already lying on the bed basically behind the paperish bathroom wall. I just decided to hold it in and got to bed. So the fucking part was soon on and it started nice. I thought I had my other primary urges under control while doin missionary and she's moaning and all but then she  wildly grabs my cheeks and starts groping them with as i thrust and i was thinking "fuck no!" but too late. I passed the gas with a great hot rod sound and felt like the whole building woke up because it was so quiet. We stopped for a second and the chick stares me straight into the eyes and somehow i started laughing and continued plowing and she was game. Finished the deed and took a nice dump after. Never talked to her again after that night but sex was ok.

[sultsult]

Yeah I got couple of awkward moments of those kind. In high school I was at bar and hooked up with this chick from my school. She was like a straight A- student but had also a nice body and all. I got pretty hammered and at some point she asked if i would come to her place. It was a fucking long walk (at least it felt like it) but the idea of getting laid kept me going. Finally at her's and i'm having the greatest urge to take shit. It was this little ass apartment with one room and paper-thin walls and my ass is exploding. I didn't want to ruin the sure to come fucking so i tried to put the water running and all but it was terrible (she didn't even have a stereo or some). I couldn't take a proper shit because she was already lying on the bed basically behind the paperish bathroom wall. I just decided to hold it in and got to bed. So the fucking part was soon on and it started nice. I thought I had my other primary urges under control while doin missionary and she's moaning and all but then she  wildly grabs my cheeks and starts groping them with as i thrust and i was thinking "fuck no!" but too late. I passed the gas with a great hot rod sound and felt like the whole building woke up because it was so quiet. We stopped for a second and the chick stares me straight into the eyes and somehow i started laughing and continued plowing and she was game. Finished the deed and took a nice dump after. Never talked to her again after that night but sex was ok.

haha nice first post dude.. i hate having to take a shit when i am at a chicks place.. luckily i am on a med that constipates me so i can usually squeeze out a quick hard one in the time it takes to piss usually, so she isnt the wiser (i hope).. this is also helpful at parties.

[Strike A Pose]

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girl ive been talking to for like 2 months wont make out with me, only closed mouth kiss. Thus, leading to nothing more then a few awkward kisses and no action.

has anyone had this happen? its like she has no desire what-so-ever to do anything.

and i've been around my fair share of loose women, but this is just weird.

[close]

Is she religious?
Is she a virgin?
Has she been fucked over in the past?
Is she twelve?

Serious note: Maybe she really likes you and wants to take things slow. I know that I have progressed slowly with physical emotions before if I am really happy about somebody and don't want to get things confused. Just play it cool though if you're psyched on her. Don't let it ALL rely on physical actions but don't let her just screw you over and play with you.

Serious bullshit.

If a girl doesn't want to get down that means she doesn't "really" like you.

Simple as that!

[vulc]

smoked some H and tubgirl'd myself. shit was cash

[smokecrack]

Long time reader and  first time poster for this thread (I think)

In high school/college I was in a relationship with this girl I went to high school with. One night I get home wasted and she comes over drunk as well. We start hooking up on the side of my house and she starts giving me an old fashioned. Bored, drunk, and starting to get a hurt penis from incorrect handling, I calmly said, "It's easier if you put your mouth on it." With little hesitation she starts going down on me. This being her first time, I was kind of blown away at how willing she was. Time passes and she is blowing me on my back patio in the middle of the night. I start getting bored AGAIN because she is awful at this as well. In result, I rub one out and she rubs my back. Looking back now it is really weird that it resulted in this but oh well.

Fast forward a few years and I have still not gotten a successful BJ. After seeing several other girls through out the years, many have claimed they're, "..really good at giving head." All of which were failures.. till recently. I started seeing this girl I met through a friend. We hook up twice and I got freaked out when she went down on me. Close to explosion and nervous about ruining her sheets/reputation with me, I went to the bathroom. After explaining my history with BJs she understands and expresses sympathy for me being lets say.. genetically different. Progressively we start boning and mid-way through she says she has to stop because I'm hurting her.

hold on bro's, i think i figured this one out:

are you modestly implying that most girls have failed at giving you toe-curling, splooge-tastic bj's because you have a huge dangus?

if you've ever had to buy a black n gold box of condoms, then i feel ya, man.

try to be patient and go at their speed. you don't want to forcibly insert too much meat for these young thangs to handle, ya know?

(or maybe try to find a skeezer who specializes in gargantuan dong. i dunno.)

[Carrolls Chesthairs]

Expand Quote

Long time reader and  first time poster for this thread (I think)

In high school/college I was in a relationship with this girl I went to high school with. One night I get home wasted and she comes over drunk as well. We start hooking up on the side of my house and she starts giving me an old fashioned. Bored, drunk, and starting to get a hurt penis from incorrect handling, I calmly said, "It's easier if you put your mouth on it." With little hesitation she starts going down on me. This being her first time, I was kind of blown away at how willing she was. Time passes and she is blowing me on my back patio in the middle of the night. I start getting bored AGAIN because she is awful at this as well. In result, I rub one out and she rubs my back. Looking back now it is really weird that it resulted in this but oh well.

Fast forward a few years and I have still not gotten a successful BJ. After seeing several other girls through out the years, many have claimed they're, "..really good at giving head." All of which were failures.. till recently. I started seeing this girl I met through a friend. We hook up twice and I got freaked out when she went down on me. Close to explosion and nervous about ruining her sheets/reputation with me, I went to the bathroom. After explaining my history with BJs she understands and expresses sympathy for me being lets say.. genetically different. Progressively we start boning and mid-way through she says she has to stop because I'm hurting her.

[close]

hold on bro's, i think i figured this one out:

are you modestly implying that most girls have failed at giving you toe-curling, splooge-tastic bj's because you have a huge dangus?

if you've ever had to buy a black n gold box of condoms, then i feel ya, man.

try to be patient and go at their speed. you don't want to forcibly insert too much meat for these young thangs to handle, ya know?

(or maybe try to find a skeezer who specializes in gargantuan dong. i dunno.)

Ha I wish that was the case but I'd say I'm just average.. but then again I've only analyzed my own dick

[Dr Steve Brule]

Spend more time in locker rooms

[1978]

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Long time reader and  first time poster for this thread (I think)

In high school/college I was in a relationship with this girl I went to high school with. One night I get home wasted and she comes over drunk as well. We start hooking up on the side of my house and she starts giving me an old fashioned. Bored, drunk, and starting to get a hurt penis from incorrect handling, I calmly said, "It's easier if you put your mouth on it." With little hesitation she starts going down on me. This being her first time, I was kind of blown away at how willing she was. Time passes and she is blowing me on my back patio in the middle of the night. I start getting bored AGAIN because she is awful at this as well. In result, I rub one out and she rubs my back. Looking back now it is really weird that it resulted in this but oh well.

Fast forward a few years and I have still not gotten a successful BJ. After seeing several other girls through out the years, many have claimed they're, "..really good at giving head." All of which were failures.. till recently. I started seeing this girl I met through a friend. We hook up twice and I got freaked out when she went down on me. Close to explosion and nervous about ruining her sheets/reputation with me, I went to the bathroom. After explaining my history with BJs she understands and expresses sympathy for me being lets say.. genetically different. Progressively we start boning and mid-way through she says she has to stop because I'm hurting her.

[close]

so the problem im gathering is you have trouble getting off from a blow job? its tough man, especially as a chronic masturbator. I think that you have to dedicate some time to training one girl to do exactly what you want.

I have had this problem too.  But after going to Thailand i was amazed. They jack you off better than you could ever do yourself.

Or just get the girl to lick your ass while you jack yourself off.

[oyolar]

Spend more time in locker rooms on Slap.

[micky682]

Please don't ever let this thread down, all I do every study hall is read them stories. Keep 'em cumming. (See what I did there)

[skate_bored]

I have had this problem too.  But after going to Thailand i was amazed. They jack you off better than you could ever do yourself.

Or just get the girl to lick your ass while you jack yourself off.

post of the day. we need a post of the day thread. im gonna go jack off now.

[No mongz]

a chick I had a one off with wanted me to eat her out, but she was a whore so I made her suck my dick instead. the condom broke earlier however she still wanted sex. i refused to go raw dog and made her suck my johnson until sunrise. she then told me it was her first time giving head but i told her not to worry. the way I see it at least she got plenty of practice that night.

Laaame

[Strike A Pose]

FUCK CONDOMS!

RAW ONLY!

[sexualhelon]

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I have had this problem too.  But after going to Thailand i was amazed. They jack you off better than you could ever do yourself.

Or just get the girl to lick your ass while you jack yourself off.

[close]

post of the day. we need a post of the day thread. im gonna go jack off now.

This is true. About the butthole, I guess most guys have to get comfortable with a girl before they ask that favor.


Story from the other night though: 

Thursday night I go down to one of the local spots with some friends and end up running into this girl I had actually met there on a Thursday night maybe a month or two ago. The first night I met her was a wild night as I ended up getting a bit wasted and made out with maybe four girls but actually got 6 numbers so I couldn't figure out who was who the next day. However, I remembered here because I saved her in my phone as cha cha woman or something easily memorable. Well, long story short, I texted her a bit but for some reason we never made it happen. Jump forward to this past Wednesday night and there we are again - talking and making out in the same bar. It wasn't going to work out that night seeing as how we had both caught rides there with our friends so we say let's do tomorrow. Tomorrow comes and she's telling me that my friends and I should come to her b-day shindig at this shitty bar which we tried to but since there was a line we were over it. I shoot her a text saying what's up and then my friends and I head to some girl's party in Tarzana who's "instagram famous" basically for posting all these ass shaking photos. That party actually ended up being pretty bogus but we made some funny Vine videos and there was indeed some ass shaking. Anyway, I drunk text this girl once we're heading back around 2 or 3 am and she say she's down to come over so I drop the homies off and head back to the crib. She get's there basically at the same time as me and everything's pretty normal including the sex. Here's the weird thing though - after we have sex she doesn't stick around which is a good thing I'd say. We bid ado and I let her out then I go back into my room to grab the condom off the dresser and throw it away but it's gone. There was just a big puddle of jizz there like she had dumped it out or something. I was thinking maybe she was courteous and threw it away or something but I couldn't find it in the trash and she didn't go to the bathroom/flush the toilet before she left. This girl fucking took the used condom with her. Fuckin' weird man.

[ontheswarm]

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I have had this problem too.  But after going to Thailand i was amazed. They jack you off better than you could ever do yourself.

Or just get the girl to lick your ass while you jack yourself off.

[close]

post of the day. we need a post of the day thread. im gonna go jack off now.

[close]

This is true. About the butthole, I guess most guys have to get comfortable with a girl before they ask that favor.


Story from the other night though: 

Thursday night I go down to one of the local spots with some friends and end up running into this girl I had actually met there on a Thursday night maybe a month or two ago. The first night I met her was a wild night as I ended up getting a bit wasted and made out with maybe four girls but actually got 6 numbers so I couldn't figure out who was who the next day. However, I remembered here because I saved her in my phone as cha cha woman or something easily memorable. Well, long story short, I texted her a bit but for some reason we never made it happen. Jump forward to this past Wednesday night and there we are again - talking and making out in the same bar. It wasn't going to work out that night seeing as how we had both caught rides there with our friends so we say let's do tomorrow. Tomorrow comes and she's telling me that my friends and I should come to her b-day shindig at this shitty bar which we tried to but since there was a line we were over it. I shoot her a text saying what's up and then my friends and I head to some girl's party in Tarzana who's "instagram famous" basically for posting all these ass shaking photos. That party actually ended up being pretty bogus but we made some funny Vine videos and there was indeed some ass shaking. Anyway, I drunk text this girl once we're heading back around 2 or 3 am and she say she's down to come over so I drop the homies off and head back to the crib. She get's there basically at the same time as me and everything's pretty normal including the sex. Here's the weird thing though - after we have sex she doesn't stick around which is a good thing I'd say. We bid ado and I let her out then I go back into my room to grab the condom off the dresser and throw it away but it's gone. There was just a big puddle of jizz there like she had dumped it out or something. I was thinking maybe she was courteous and threw it away or something but I couldn't find it in the trash and she didn't go to the bathroom/flush the toilet before she left. This girl fucking took the used condom with her. Fuckin' weird man.

That is fucking weird man hahah. I used to live pretty close to Tarzana. I miss the valley.

[jimi420]

does it count as cheating if you just piss in a girl's mouth?

[sexualhelon]

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I have had this problem too.  But after going to Thailand i was amazed. They jack you off better than you could ever do yourself.

Or just get the girl to lick your ass while you jack yourself off.

[close]

post of the day. we need a post of the day thread. im gonna go jack off now.

[close]

You used to live in the valley and you miss it? Why? And where do you live now?

This is true. About the butthole, I guess most guys have to get comfortable with a girl before they ask that favor.


Story from the other night though: 

Thursday night I go down to one of the local spots with some friends and end up running into this girl I had actually met there on a Thursday night maybe a month or two ago. The first night I met her was a wild night as I ended up getting a bit wasted and made out with maybe four girls but actually got 6 numbers so I couldn't figure out who was who the next day. However, I remembered here because I saved her in my phone as cha cha woman or something easily memorable. Well, long story short, I texted her a bit but for some reason we never made it happen. Jump forward to this past Wednesday night and there we are again - talking and making out in the same bar. It wasn't going to work out that night seeing as how we had both caught rides there with our friends so we say let's do tomorrow. Tomorrow comes and she's telling me that my friends and I should come to her b-day shindig at this shitty bar which we tried to but since there was a line we were over it. I shoot her a text saying what's up and then my friends and I head to some girl's party in Tarzana who's "instagram famous" basically for posting all these ass shaking photos. That party actually ended up being pretty bogus but we made some funny Vine videos and there was indeed some ass shaking. Anyway, I drunk text this girl once we're heading back around 2 or 3 am and she say she's down to come over so I drop the homies off and head back to the crib. She get's there basically at the same time as me and everything's pretty normal including the sex. Here's the weird thing though - after we have sex she doesn't stick around which is a good thing I'd say. We bid ado and I let her out then I go back into my room to grab the condom off the dresser and throw it away but it's gone. There was just a big puddle of jizz there like she had dumped it out or something. I was thinking maybe she was courteous and threw it away or something but I couldn't find it in the trash and she didn't go to the bathroom/flush the toilet before she left. This girl fucking took the used condom with her. Fuckin' weird man.

[close]

That is fucking weird man hahah. I used to live pretty close to Tarzana. I miss the valley.

[EnjoiSanJose]

that bitch probably took that condom so she could get pregnant and your baby.

[Made In China]

that bitch probably took that condom so she could get pregnant and your baby.

But he said she dumped the jizz out?

[Mat]

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that bitch probably took that condom so she could get pregnant and your baby.

[close]

But he said she dumped the jizz out?

she probably does that with all the dudes she hooks up with, and will have them hanging on her wall in her apt. just walls covered with hundreds of empty used rubbers