I thought I already hit a low point in life but I just hit an even lower point. I've recently given up drugs, except for caffeine. Alcohol is literally one of the worst drugs. Countless times, I've seen it ruin other people's lives but I never learned from their mistakes. Now that it's affected the lives of people that I care about, I see how my decisions have negative consequences on others, as well as myself. I've done my best to make amends and there's no benefit in dwelling on the past...I've learned from my mistakes and am doing my best to better myself as a person. I have to create long-term goals, aside from short-term goals, with set dates. Also, I need to work on my: speech, self-esteem, time management, communication, diet, exercise, and impulse. When I'm feeling bummed, I'm going to just go skate, instead of getting caught back in the cycle. If I'm injured or some shit, I'm going to read or learn any topic that I'm interested in. I've already cut off TV and movies to spend my time more wisely. There's a decent chance that's I can die from a car crash, get stabbed by a bum or even get hit by a bus. Life is shorter than people realize, and I want to utilize my time as efficiently as possible. I'm the back of my head, I've always thought that I wouldn't be getting fucked up if I was truly happy. I don't want a therapist or any help. It's something that's I want to deal with by me self. Hopefully, when I sort everything out, I'll be a stronger, more mature and self-reliant person. I already know what I want to make me happy isn't much, and is very reasonable, as well as attainable. /rant