As many of you know I've got a lot of baggage with living 42 years and one of the things I have been doing is seeing a psychiatrist, therapist, neurologist, and hypnotist.
I take some of these meds as they make me not feel anything. Happiness, Sadness, Sexual Attraction nope completely puts me in a waking vegetative state of just being there.
I know I know it sounds lame to see a hypnotist but after a head injury around 2002 my head has lost a lot of memories and I've had reoccurring thoughts and dreams that I'm another person.
I'll give you a run down of what happened as told to me by me exgf.well before I smacked my head real hard, was riding a hotshot train from Minneapolis to Seattle.
Somewhere along the way I was riding a flat car you know those train car with the semi trailers on them? well I guess I went to take a piss and during the time the train swayed back and forth and while I pissed I tumbled off going 60+ mph.
Woke up bleeding out of my skull managed to drag my ass to a house and some nice couple took me in. Went to the hospital and had no recollection of who I was where I was, I wasn't completely clueless as I figured something with trains hence where I woke up, but my head was swollen like a grapefruit one side had a fracture and I broke my jaw on the left side.
So when the Dr's checked me out I was in there for 2 weeks got my head examined jaw straightened out, I go to get released the nice couple took me in for about 3 or 4 months.
One day I was piddling on a skateboard with couples son and landed a nollie flip and I shouted HOLY SHIT Brett needs to hear this I picked up the phone dialed a homies number and before I could figure out who this dude was or who I was I was like "ummmm I don't know you but this is the first time I've called so fill me in"
He was like Rob stop fucking with me wtf stop playing?!
I explained my situation in full and where I was is Whitefish, Montana well he fills in the details of where I was going and who I was rolling with and whom I was dating.
I don't know if you guys have ever had amnesia and I wouldn't want you to have it as it sucked for me. The feeling of knowing who you are and that you have purpose gives you an exhilarating feeling.
So fast forward to a few weeks ago I was seeing my hypnotist I am explaining my hatred for holidays and stuff.
We go into a session and apparently it stems from almost being abducted as a kid I was a small kid when I went black friday shopping I was holding my brothers hand and we were walking through a mall during the time and it wasn't my brothers hand it was a random woman's pulling me hard out the exit my brother came in like a bat out of hell and yelled at the lady and he carried me on his back.
TL/DR I smacked my head lost my memory and have delusions of crazy shit.