Author Topic: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread  (Read 28554 times)

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Deputy Wendell

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #90 on: April 03, 2021, 11:34:10 AM »
i've been coming into this thread and reading what everyone has been sharing, and i really do appreciate y'all and i am inspired by y'all...your honesty and sincerity, your caring and patience, your strength and resilience, your trust and compassion...SLAP has a lot of highs and lows, and this thread is truly one of its high bright places.

you know, i'm pretty far along in life--i'll be 50 this month--and in a fairly solid place in life...emotionally, spiritually, and--for what it is worth--economically...the latter of which does not matter a lot, really, and it seems silly mentioning it, but life experience has taught me that it makes a difference...in retrospect, a lot of what i have dealt with when i was younger was compounded by poverty, so i don't want to be dismissive about material circumstances, and how they can make bad situations worse.

we did lose my mom to Covid this past October, and i caught it when i was taking care of her (before we had to get her into the hospital) and had a minor to moderate bout with it...i never thought i was going to need to go to the hospital myself, but it was the sickest i've ever been. i was teaching 3 different classes at 2 different universities through all of this, while getting sicker and having to make this call to the hospital every day, knowing that there would not be good news--she was 77 and had diabetes, so it really was brutal to her...at one point her lungs collapsed, at another point her kidneys failed. truly the hardest two weeks of my life, and i know i am still dealing with some kind of--dare i say--PTSD from it.

i did ultimately have to have 2 of my classes assigned to another instructor unfortunately, but the English department at that university really had my back, i'm grateful to say. as a literature and writing professor (adjunct), teaching through Zoom has not been as bad as i thought it was going to be when the pandemic really started changing things--and i deal with students' tears at least once a semester in a "normal" semester--but since the pandemic changed our lives, i have had a number of students break down weeping during conferences and office hours, and i've done my best to make sure they know that they are not alone, and i've done everything i can to be as flexible as possible with work and due dates and all, but it has been an emotionally trying time just trying to maintain my own emotional well being when i feel so powerless to help some of my students in these moments....thank god for a little Maker's Mark at the ends of those days.

still, things could be worse and i'm grateful and i'm especially concerned with counting my blessings on the daily, and never taking anyone or anything for granted. one of the biggest challenges since my mom passed, is i have a younger sister (in her late 40s) who is developmentally disabled (and i believe autistic, although they didn't really look for that when she was younger), she has lived with my mom her entire life, in mom's house her entire life, and has not worked in almost 20 years, and she is now my responsibility...i love her, she is quite innocent, but i also feel quite overwhelmed too at times.

ok, thank-you for taking the time to listen/read if you did...i just figured since i have been coming in here and reading what people have been sharing, i'd share myself, and i'm sure i'm leaving plenty out.

y'all are inspiring and i hope and pray for the best for ya'll...

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #91 on: April 04, 2021, 07:40:57 AM »
I’m sorry if I’ve been shitty to any of you or if my jokes about my experiences with mental illness have caused anybody pain. Despite my best efforts, I am accustomed to a surly and irreverent disposition, and it is because of how badly I’ve been hurt. Don’t let me discourage you. I’m right there with you. I don’t cheer, but I’ll make us coffee.
If you can't handle me at my Marc Johnson, you don't deserve me at my Bobby Puleo.

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #92 on: April 04, 2021, 09:12:57 AM »
I’m sorry if I’ve been shitty to any of you or if my jokes about my experiences with mental illness have caused anybody pain. Despite my best efforts, I am accustomed to a surly and irreverent disposition, and it is because of how badly I’ve been hurt. Don’t let me discourage you. I’m right there with you. I don’t cheer, but I’ll make us coffee.
Make mine a triple espresso and we’re good.
Dueces Bitch's

Ms. Tamzarian

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #93 on: April 04, 2021, 07:01:51 PM »
Deputy & Janus, welcome aboard my friends! It's Always the right time to join in, and all are welcome!

Deputy W I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your mother this year, that is fucking awful. I can only imagine the grief that comes with losing a parent during the pandemic ..... we are here for you No matter what, and here to hear you out whether it's hard times with the workload of teaching or the stressors with caretaking for your beautiful sibling. One way or another, you will see it through no matter what and we will be here to cheer you on!

Janus, please don't worry about it! In here we are a big misfit family of goofs. But now that you mention it, I'll skip the coffee and take a bear claw! ;D

JANUS

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #94 on: April 05, 2021, 07:15:54 AM »
Espressos and bear claws coming up!
If you can't handle me at my Marc Johnson, you don't deserve me at my Bobby Puleo.

Deputy Wendell

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #95 on: April 05, 2021, 08:24:47 AM »
Espressos and bear claws coming up!

cheers friend! i'll take a nip of Baileys in mine...

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #96 on: April 05, 2021, 10:10:02 AM »
i've been coming into this thread and reading what everyone has been sharing, and i really do appreciate y'all and i am inspired by y'all...your honesty and sincerity, your caring and patience, your strength and resilience, your trust and compassion...SLAP has a lot of highs and lows, and this thread is truly one of its high bright places.

you know, i'm pretty far along in life--i'll be 50 this month--and in a fairly solid place in life...emotionally, spiritually, and--for what it is worth--economically...the latter of which does not matter a lot, really, and it seems silly mentioning it, but life experience has taught me that it makes a difference...in retrospect, a lot of what i have dealt with when i was younger was compounded by poverty, so i don't want to be dismissive about material circumstances, and how they can make bad situations worse.

we did lose my mom to Covid this past October, and i caught it when i was taking care of her (before we had to get her into the hospital) and had a minor to moderate bout with it...i never thought i was going to need to go to the hospital myself, but it was the sickest i've ever been. i was teaching 3 different classes at 2 different universities through all of this, while getting sicker and having to make this call to the hospital every day, knowing that there would not be good news--she was 77 and had diabetes, so it really was brutal to her...at one point her lungs collapsed, at another point her kidneys failed. truly the hardest two weeks of my life, and i know i am still dealing with some kind of--dare i say--PTSD from it.

i did ultimately have to have 2 of my classes assigned to another instructor unfortunately, but the English department at that university really had my back, i'm grateful to say. as a literature and writing professor (adjunct), teaching through Zoom has not been as bad as i thought it was going to be when the pandemic really started changing things--and i deal with students' tears at least once a semester in a "normal" semester--but since the pandemic changed our lives, i have had a number of students break down weeping during conferences and office hours, and i've done my best to make sure they know that they are not alone, and i've done everything i can to be as flexible as possible with work and due dates and all, but it has been an emotionally trying time just trying to maintain my own emotional well being when i feel so powerless to help some of my students in these moments....thank god for a little Maker's Mark at the ends of those days.

still, things could be worse and i'm grateful and i'm especially concerned with counting my blessings on the daily, and never taking anyone or anything for granted. one of the biggest challenges since my mom passed, is i have a younger sister (in her late 40s) who is developmentally disabled (and i believe autistic, although they didn't really look for that when she was younger), she has lived with my mom her entire life, in mom's house her entire life, and has not worked in almost 20 years, and she is now my responsibility...i love her, she is quite innocent, but i also feel quite overwhelmed too at times.

ok, thank-you for taking the time to listen/read if you did...i just figured since i have been coming in here and reading what people have been sharing, i'd share myself, and i'm sure i'm leaving plenty out.

y'all are inspiring and i hope and pray for the best for ya'll...
Dang Deputy Wendell.
Dude I’m so sorry for your loss with your mum, I lost my dad around Veterans Day 2015 and what’s worse is my son (doggo) had to be put down October 31st 2011 stomach cancer.

I have and had to prioritize my mental well-being alongside my sobriety on to top it off grieve without self harm or suicide adulation.

I know I especially can give a few people on here a hard time for whatever reasons but it’s never for malice or hurting anyone in particular feelings.

So in short but caring detail I do care for you guy’s and the circle of Pals on here for their opinions regardless of how I either agree or disagree with them I love you all.
Dueces Bitch's

Deputy Wendell

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #97 on: April 05, 2021, 11:56:47 AM »
Armin and El Fap...your kind and encouraging words are appreciated--and i'm sorry for your losses as well El Fap...

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #98 on: April 05, 2021, 10:13:24 PM »
@Deputy Wendell

yo my gun toting lefty, shreddin breddren, I hope you're getting a chance to send some rounds down range. I haven't been out in a few months, but look forward to it in the near future. I'm driving across in June (fully vaxxed) and if I end up swinging thru Detroit way to see my cousin, I'll send ya a PM for a SLAP skate and shoot  :o seriously, man, hope you're able to take good care.
If you plant ice, you’re gonna harvest wind

Deputy Wendell

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #99 on: April 06, 2021, 05:56:17 AM »
@Deputy Wendell

yo my gun toting lefty, shreddin breddren, I hope you're getting a chance to send some rounds down range. I haven't been out in a few months, but look forward to it in the near future. I'm driving across in June (fully vaxxed) and if I end up swinging thru Detroit way to see my cousin, I'll send ya a PM for a SLAP skate and shoot  :o seriously, man, hope you're able to take good care.

copy that SkateMore...i'm here brother...

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #100 on: April 06, 2021, 06:08:40 AM »
Also, Wendell, I’m sure your students appreciate you trying to be there for them. I’m back in school now and I’ve noticed the profs are extending themselves, even though it’s a rough time for them, too. Even the little things mean a lot.
If you can't handle me at my Marc Johnson, you don't deserve me at my Bobby Puleo.

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #101 on: April 06, 2021, 10:14:55 AM »
i've been coming into this thread and reading what everyone has been sharing, and i really do appreciate y'all and i am inspired by y'all...

ok, thank-you for taking the time to listen/read if you did...i just figured since i have been coming in here and reading what people have been sharing, i'd share myself, and i'm sure i'm leaving plenty out.

y'all are inspiring and i hope and pray for the best for ya'll...

Wendell, thanks for coming in here. As a current student I know I'm speaking for all students when I say thank you, this shit is just tough. I'm sorry for your loss.

These post reminds me of driving on the highway late at night and having the realization that all of the traffic on the street has love, artistic output, significant others, back pain, but instead of traffic its slap posts with silly profile names and skate gifs/simpsons memes
I have bad taste and I smell like fetta cheese


Deputy Wendell

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #102 on: April 07, 2021, 01:34:17 PM »
i'm much obliged for all of the positivity Spunkchild and Janus, regarding this crazy "remote" era of teaching and learning we're all engaged in for now...full steam ahead!

Grind King Rims

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #103 on: April 10, 2021, 02:30:02 PM »
Things have continued to be tough. Still looking for local CBT. Trying not to resort to drugs/alcohol/sex as coping. Finding it very hard to feed myself or fill my time lately.

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #104 on: April 10, 2021, 02:56:29 PM »
What an uplifting thread, really nice read. Thanks Armin.

https://timetothrivetherapy.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/The-Cognitive-Behavioral-Workbook-for-Anxiety.pdf

Here's a link to an anxiety workbook I've been doing that has helped me a lot for any pals with anxiety. You can kind of skim through the chapters and read parts that make the most sense for your situation. It's helped me a lot these last few months. Hope it helps someone else.

JANUS

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #105 on: April 12, 2021, 06:22:20 AM »
I really hoped to contribute constructively to this thread, but I’ve been struggling lately, too. I can’t tell if this me trying to be helpful, or me trying to vent, but:
I’ve been dealing with a mood disorder for years now, and I’m still surprised at times by the magnitude and frequency of my mood swings. I’ve learned some strategies to help me cope, but it can still cause me significant problems. I guess I’m trying to say coping with mental illness is a fucking process, it can/does get easier to deal with, but there are still times where I fall apart. Please don’t get discouraged.
If you can't handle me at my Marc Johnson, you don't deserve me at my Bobby Puleo.

JANUS

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #106 on: April 13, 2021, 09:44:05 AM »
And like that, I swing back upward.

Things have continued to be tough. Still looking for local CBT. Trying not to resort to drugs/alcohol/sex as coping. Finding it very hard to feed myself or fill my time lately.

I'm not sure if you eat eggs, but 3 egg omelettes have saved me during depressive episodes more times than I'd like to admit. I can't find the Good Eats Reloaded episode that I learned to make omelettes from, but it's basically the same as this episode (sorry for the youtube quality):

https://youtu.be/nX7g5A50IuE?t=309

Warming the eggs is not necessary IMO. Omelettes are fast, easy, and if you have salsa and any sort of carb handy, it can be pretty filling. Also, if you fuck it up, you get scrambled eggs, which is also good.
If you can't handle me at my Marc Johnson, you don't deserve me at my Bobby Puleo.

lamfordie

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #107 on: April 13, 2021, 12:52:01 PM »
So Im a librarian and I found out I may lose my position to someone because their school is closing down and they have seniority. Now Im feeling disconnected from even doing my work. Plus to make matters worse my school is bringing back all the students onto campus starting next week so Im already anxious from that.

Grind King Rims

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #108 on: April 13, 2021, 01:11:07 PM »
Thanks Janus. I have 4 eggs and toast every morning. After that is a real gamble, ha


The days are getting longer and the weather is slowly getting better. Makes a big difference. There's that to look forward to, everyone.

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #109 on: April 14, 2021, 03:26:34 AM »
Yo @Grind King Rims soft boil eggs and butter your toast then cut the toast into strips aka soldiers and cut the top of the eggs and dig in
listen to cosmic psychos

Grind King Rims

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #110 on: April 15, 2021, 11:11:05 AM »
Hahahaha, thanks @matty_c , I might give that a go at the weekend when I want to take a trip 20 years back in time to my Nana's house. <3

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #111 on: April 15, 2021, 05:05:14 PM »
Hahaha my mum used to make it for me
Breakfast equivalent of a Zoloft imo
listen to cosmic psychos

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #112 on: April 17, 2021, 02:11:56 AM »
Every slip back into depression feels worse. Sometimes I literally have to force a mug of coffee to my mouth. Feels like there is no electricity running through my body at all. I was sitting beside the bath after washing my cat and my housemate came in to tell me she was going out but I just blanked out, stared into space and couldn't reply. I've been dealing with this for 15 years and have tried everything from therapy, psychedelics, a regular gym routine, meds, eating right etc.  I guess i'm treatment resistant, or still havn't worked out my core issues.
I appear healthy but i've really been stuck in a cloud of doom for a long time.

JANUS

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #113 on: April 17, 2021, 07:03:11 AM »
Every slip back into depression feels worse. Sometimes I literally have to force a mug of coffee to my mouth. Feels like there is no electricity running through my body at all. I was sitting beside the bath after washing my cat and my housemate came in to tell me she was going out but I just blanked out, stared into space and couldn't reply. I've been dealing with this for 15 years and have tried everything from therapy, psychedelics, a regular gym routine, meds, eating right etc.  I guess i'm treatment resistant, or still havn't worked out my core issues.
I appear healthy but i've really been stuck in a cloud of doom for a long time.

I feel you, friend.
If you can't handle me at my Marc Johnson, you don't deserve me at my Bobby Puleo.

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #114 on: April 17, 2021, 11:07:15 AM »
My dad passed away unexpectedly a month ago from what we believe was a heart attack. Ever since then I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about his life and became convinced he was on the autism spectrum. There were a lot of signs.

Then I started thinking about my own life and whether I also had autism, and so many of the struggles I’ve experienced all made sense. I’ve honestly felt cursed for most of my life, that for some reason I wasn’t allowed to be happy or to reach a certain level of achievement. But now it’s obvious that it was the programming I’ve been running.

Any other late diagnosis autists on here?

Ms. Tamzarian

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #115 on: April 17, 2021, 05:52:08 PM »
I'm so sorry I've been absent lately my friends .... life has of Course taken the tables and whipped them around & lately my life's greatest fear of being institutionalized (again) has come screaming back into my head. But I am safe! I'm just afraid, but you know.... BEING AFRAID IS OKAY! it's natural and it's normal but of course it still fucking SUCKS.

Everything will be okay my friends, let's stay in this shit together & for each other & fight this battle with all the fucking guts we've got! I'm so sorry I can't read into everybody's posts and share a more thoughtful response; tonight has been very trying so far... BUT I just ordered some Grub and it's gonna get here real soon! So let's all resolve to do something super nice for ourselves tonight if We can, and to fucking CELEBRATE the fact that our self-love is Real and can only grow stronger!

All my best my friends, it's gonna be O k :)

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #116 on: April 17, 2021, 09:05:01 PM »
I've been having a lot of suicidal thoughts over the past few days. In talks this week with my therapist and psychiatrist, both recommended some sort of meditative physical activity, so I went for a walk this afternoon. I ended up on the Williamsburg Bridge and I don't even remember going there. I kind of freaked out because the closest I had ever had to a plan was to jump off of a bridge. I had a crippling anxiety attack and then over the course of almost an hour, slowly managed to make it to the other side. I'm a real wreck right now.

Sorry if this isn't the right place for this. I don't interact with anybody regularly and I just felt like I had to tell somebody

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #117 on: April 17, 2021, 09:40:32 PM »
stay strong my slap pals! perhaps we can organize a group zoom? I can read your tarot cards for fun as well!

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #118 on: April 18, 2021, 03:43:11 AM »
I've been having a lot of suicidal thoughts over the past few days. In talks this week with my therapist and psychiatrist, both recommended some sort of meditative physical activity, so I went for a walk this afternoon. I ended up on the Williamsburg Bridge and I don't even remember going there. I kind of freaked out because the closest I had ever had to a plan was to jump off of a bridge. I had a crippling anxiety attack and then over the course of almost an hour, slowly managed to make it to the other side. I'm a real wreck right now.

Sorry if this isn't the right place for this. I don't interact with anybody regularly and I just felt like I had to tell somebody

This is the right place! Thanks for coming on here and letting us in, we are here to listen. I'm glad to hear that you managed to get yourself home.
Sounds like you got really scared and really need some understanding for how scary this was, is that right? I hope you're in a position to take good care of yourself now and can gradually get to a better place.

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Re: The WELLNESS OUTREACH & SUPPORT Thread
« Reply #119 on: April 18, 2021, 06:49:37 AM »
And back down I go. I assume this is a stressful time for everybody. I love you all. Please do something nice for yourselves today, if you have the ability.
If you can't handle me at my Marc Johnson, you don't deserve me at my Bobby Puleo.