Really bad movies

[layzieyez]

I’m gonna go there:

A Scanner Darkly

Please explain.

Also, did you watch Waking Life?

[Abyss1]

Decided to binge all the fast and furious since netflix dropped the first 5...and holy shit #7 was weird with Jason Statham and was kinda aweful, I skipped 8 the trailer just looked horrible, and #9 was complete shit...I fell asleep on it 3x and still haven't worked up the energy to pick back up.  There's a scene were Carbi B shows up and it kills it for me, and Ludacris looks like he doesn't give a fuck with all of his lines
Kinda want to see #10 just for shits and giggles but know it'll be shit.

[PatrickSkateman]

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I’m gonna go there:

A Scanner Darkly

[close]

Please explain.

Also, did you watch Waking Life?

Not my style, super depressing and way into the heavy drugs. Also filmed funny. I’d say the same for Philip K. Dick’s novels.

I haven’t seen Waking Life.

[GS77]

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I’m gonna go there:

A Scanner Darkly

[close]

Please explain.

Also, did you watch Waking Life?

[close]

Not my style, super depressing and way into the heavy drugs. Also filmed funny. I’d say the same for Philip K. Dick’s novels.

I haven’t seen Waking Life.

I thought visually, A Scanner Darkly is very interesting, but I do not remember anything that happened in the movie so I don’t believe the plot was very cohesive. I’d watch it again, but I recall wanting to like it more than I did.

[Quique]

Just remembered Glenn Danzig masterpiece Verotika, any of these movies we've been mentioning looks like Casino after watching it. At least you can laugh a little bit.

[layzieyez]

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I’m gonna go there:

A Scanner Darkly

[close]

Please explain.

Also, did you watch Waking Life?

[close]

Not my style, super depressing and way into the heavy drugs. Also filmed funny. I’d say the same for Philip K. Dick’s novels.

I haven’t seen Waking Life.

The visuals seemed to be a progression of the dream style animation in Waking Life. Also, if you enjoyed his first film Slackers, it is sort of similar to it.

Right now, I’m currently watching the latest Puppetmaster movie Doctor Death.

Anyone watch the last two fan fueled Friday the 13th movies?

[PatrickSkateman]

Aggro Dr1ft looks horrendous.

[spooky electric]

Any of you seen The Rollerblade Seven - or I guess any Scott Shaw films (I'm assuming this based off the Rollerblade Seven which is the only one of his films I have seen). It verges on so bad it's good, but is nevertheless just bad.

[Atiba Applebum]

Perhaps "really bad" is an over-assessment, but I re-watched Christopher McQuarrie's directorial debut, 2000's "The Way of the Gun", last night.

I remembered not liking it when it came out but wondered if it would prove better on a re-watch a quarter of a century later.

Imo, it does not. It's passable but seems very edge-lordy, without much depth or reward. I liked the performances of Benicio del Toro, James Caan and Juliet Lewis, the cinematography was nice to look at and the action scenes were directed well.

But all the characters ultimately seemed like cardboard cut outs, without much gained from the experience. Ryan Phillipe, especially, seemed like he was in out of his league and way over his head, with his persistent tough guy act.

Not to mention it’s bizarre attempt to be butch and Sundance to the point of using their names.   Always felt like a late entry in the Tarantino rip off genres although some of those, like Go!, have aged pretty well and kinda can stand on its own

[munchbox]

“honey dont” was dogshit
all the budget went to the cast
because the writing was clearly an afterthought

the description was in the title
and unfortunately that went over my head

[IWANNABEABIGDOG]

The 2024 Crow remake, it was awful in a very lovable fun terrible way

[non]

I just tried watching Singularity starring John Cusack. It was released in 2017, and part of its three minute text-based intro/exposition (which plays like a trailer for itself) proposes that in 2019, 2 years from the film's release date, 3 out of 4 households worldwide will have a humanoid robot. Cusack has a glowing telecube that allows him to see 100 years into the future, video monitor style, of his robo-clone of some random kid who he sent there so he could find this place called Aurora where the humans *will be* hiding after he cancelled humanity with robots in the movie's immediate past tense. He explained this to some croney right beforehand in what looks like the office of the Architect from the Matrix Trilogy, during the robot apocalypse Cusack ordered, which we learn is part of the Kronos agenda/technology/whatever, at which time, this character's head starts bursting with boils, radioactively pulsating and glowing, and one of his eyeballs glows and he yells "Kronos?!!" Cusack just looks at him like, "Yeah, dude." This event is not explained any further, and the character henceforth looks like that. The robo-kid who plays the Frodo character in the future against Cusack-Kronos's Sauron omniscience is a dedicated mouthbreather. He meets up with a budget JLaw from Hunger Games in the forest-dystopia future where there are no other humans, except wherever Aurora is, and both of their clothes look fresh from Amazon.com (smooth leather jacket, crisp zip up hoody, ntm her fresh matte black crossbow), 100 years after stores or laundry machines have ever existed. Watched for 20 minutes on computer at work, funny for a sec partly thanks to the music trying very hard.

[GnarAlarm]

My fiance had never seen Robin Hood: Men in Tights.
I was so excited to watch it with her, I had so many fond memories of it...but hadn't seen it since I was like 13.

I'd say by Mel Brooks standards it's a really bad movie.

Before you strangle me to death, watch it again as an adult.

We just sat there awkwardly, I kept waiting for it to be as funny as I remembered and it just never happened.

There's a few kind of funny parts but so many of the jokes haven't aged well at all.
Not like they're offensive or anything, they leaned way too hard into 1992/93 pop culture.
Like jokes that reference Reebok pumps and Dessert Storm and shit.
Most Mel Brooks movies are pretty timeless, Blazing Saddles came out a decade before I was even born but when I first watched it as a teenager it was hilarious. If you had someone born in 2005 watch Men in Tights they'd be like "I don't get it, this is stupid".

[botefdunn]

both of their clothes look fresh from Amazon.com (smooth leather jacket, crisp zip up hoody, ntm her fresh matte black crossbow),

good description, funny. mediocre hair and wardrobe are always a telltale.sign that nobody in production really gave a fuck

[Atiba Applebum]

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both of their clothes look fresh from Amazon.com (smooth leather jacket, crisp zip up hoody, ntm her fresh matte black crossbow),

[close]

good description, funny. mediocre hair and wardrobe are always a telltale.sign that nobody in production really gave a fuck

It’s like network tv wardrobe.  Everyone has so many layers and young men definitely always rock the jacket over the hoodie

[ToySanta]

Springsteen: Deliver Me From Nowhere is less useful than a pile of dog shit I step in barefoot. Jiminy Cricket, it is so fucking boring and it’s two hours long and Jeremy Allen White hardly sings and does not sing very well (not like Phoenix & Witherspoon in Walk the Line, as an example) and I’m guessing he doesn’t play guitar because they actively cut around showing his fingers on the strings. Clocking that was at least comical.

Also every scene of him sitting across from someone, talking to them he looks like an asshole. Man, I hope this performance is a standalone and not what people rave about elsewhere.


Their was more thought put in to set decoration than the script. Outside of a child in a few scenes, it was obvious how many people were in a movie “acting”. It was a lot of telling not showing and they did that so poorly. Bleh. Even embellishing storylines couldn’t save this dung pile.

[Atiba Applebum]

I hate that actor.   Hated him in Shameless, hated him playing the same character basically in the Bear.

[companguero]

My fiance had never seen Robin Hood: Men in Tights.
I was so excited to watch it with her, I had so many fond memories of it...but hadn't seen it since I was like 13.

I'd say by Mel Brooks standards it's a really bad movie.

Before you strangle me to death, watch it again as an adult.

We just sat there awkwardly, I kept waiting for it to be as funny as I remembered and it just never happened.

There's a few kind of funny parts but so many of the jokes haven't aged well at all.
Not like they're offensive or anything, they leaned way too hard into 1992/93 pop culture.
Like jokes that reference Reebok pumps and Dessert Storm and shit.
Most Mel Brooks movies are pretty timeless, Blazing Saddles came out a decade before I was even born but when I first watched it as a teenager it was hilarious. If you had someone born in 2005 watch Men in Tights they'd be like "I don't get it, this is stupid".

That's sad to hear, just looking back at that cast is bringing back memories of their characters and scenes I like.

In a similar vein, I watched Orange County about ten years ago with a couple people, I remember the anticipation of enjoying Jack Black. I couldn't believe how quickly it turned into a roast fest and I couldn't connect at all with my past self that liked it.
Looking back at the cast, it is heavy with greats but it was one stupid scene after another.

A movie I'm still eager to watch a second time is Freddy got Fingered because no other movie has ever made me feel like time was stolen from my life when it ended. I think highly of Tom Green and am curious what kind of impression I'll get this time around.

A funny memory to end this with was watching no country for old men with my dad and now ex.
At the end we were in a somber mood but my dad scoffed and blurted out "well that was stupid".
I never face palmed internally so hard.

[Mildred]

Skate To Hell 2026.



Do not be fooled there is NO SKATEBOARDING IN THIS FILM. I thought a film about a satanic skateboarding macguffin would at least have one shitty ollie. Nope. I wasn't expecting much; maybe a couple of locals slapping a curb in silicone masks, at best a cameo from some low profile pro of yesteryear. But you don't even get that. Some people push awkwardly for maybe one or two seconds before disappearing into 'Hell'.
 It's the shitty shittiest low budget crapfest ever committed to a memory card. I don't know what the plot is because I largely fast forwarded through it. It "stars" some dude who looks like a monkey, two girls in tight shorts and a bunch of old hams swearing about fucking Satan. The wardrobe is Hot Topic seconds and the sets are Vegas stripmalls.
I repeat, there is NO SKATEBOARDING. 

[rukes]

Expand Quote

My fiance had never seen Robin Hood: Men in Tights.
I was so excited to watch it with her, I had so many fond memories of it...but hadn't seen it since I was like 13.

I'd say by Mel Brooks standards it's a really bad movie.

Before you strangle me to death, watch it again as an adult.

We just sat there awkwardly, I kept waiting for it to be as funny as I remembered and it just never happened.

There's a few kind of funny parts but so many of the jokes haven't aged well at all.
Not like they're offensive or anything, they leaned way too hard into 1992/93 pop culture.
Like jokes that reference Reebok pumps and Dessert Storm and shit.
Most Mel Brooks movies are pretty timeless, Blazing Saddles came out a decade before I was even born but when I first watched it as a teenager it was hilarious. If you had someone born in 2005 watch Men in Tights they'd be like "I don't get it, this is stupid".

[close]

That's sad to hear, just looking back at that cast is bringing back memories of their characters and scenes I like.

In a similar vein, I watched Orange County about ten years ago with a couple people, I remember the anticipation of enjoying Jack Black. I couldn't believe how quickly it turned into a roast fest and I couldn't connect at all with my past self that liked it.
Looking back at the cast, it is heavy with greats but it was one stupid scene after another.

A movie I'm still eager to watch a second time is Freddy got Fingered because no other movie has ever made me feel like time was stolen from my life when it ended. I think highly of Tom Green and am curious what kind of impression I'll get this time around.

A funny memory to end this with was watching no country for old men with my dad and now ex.
At the end we were in a somber mood but my dad scoffed and blurted out "well that was stupid".
I never face palmed internally so hard.

Freddy Got Fingered was worth it for the Sausage Piano scene alone.

Also where's your LeBaron Freddy?

The rest, who knows? I also haven't seen it in like 25 years.

[non]

Deadfall (1993) is a terrible crime/noir film directed by FF Coppola's nephew but it has the most unhinged Nic Cage performance I've seen. He's really funny. His character dies halfway through so it's only really a 45 min time investment, and that's not a spoiler. Arsenal (2017) was a sequel with that character, Eddie, who was supposed to have died, but it's not worth watching unless for some reason you wanna see John Cusack wearing a durag and a gold medallion switching between a toothpick and a vape. I don't recommend Deadfall, but if you want to see Cage go bananas, it's there.

[Bupstop]

Anyone see New York Ninja? It’s terrible but fun to watch. Evidently it was filmed back in the 80s but was only recently completed because all the sound and dialogue was missing and had to be redone.
I love dumb movies and ninjas so this ticked all the boxes for me.

[matty_c]

There’s this one with Stallone in it and it’s called cobra
It’s not very good at all

[Rockin Robbin]

Look no further, my friends.