@Gray Imp Sausage Metal sent me a message that these just dropped at a shop in Tokyo...
What in the trustafarian, open-carrying bolt-gun, low-slung belt, chalk-bagger having climber fever-dream are those crimes against nature?
The entire line viscerally affects me the same way D3's did when they originally dropped and when they triggered similar PTSD upon re-release. I wanted and want to use bleach on my mind's eye. We're talking levels of nausea/secondhand embarrassment not personally experienced since the Homer/Pontiac Aztec/cybertruck.
Just because one can, doesn't mean one should...but if they're going to unleash such Alia Atreides level abominations upon us, they should at least go all-in and release a tie-dyed colorway.
Honestly though if they're your thing, more power to you, speed climbers.