Author Topic: real confessions  (Read 1739185 times)

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ROCKxADIO420

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4170 on: October 16, 2013, 08:37:50 PM »
idk what that is but im disappointed in you too

Phil McCrackin

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4171 on: October 16, 2013, 08:49:51 PM »
yeah you really are fucked up l33tg33k, someone needs to ship you off to africa or something to people with real problems

Phil McCrackin

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4172 on: October 16, 2013, 08:51:06 PM »
lyk get off this forum you making me sick!

pencil

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4173 on: October 17, 2013, 01:19:58 PM »
thank god rock a dio four twenty never let sus dawn
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LambShank

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4174 on: October 19, 2013, 12:17:56 PM »
I would never try to kill myself, but it's not rare for me to fantasize about developing some crippling chronic illness with little chance at recovery. I just want my girlfriend to push me around in a wheelchair as I wither away. It's probably some fucked up subconscious realization that I'm taking my youth and good health for granted but I don't know, I'm pretty far away from her and it tears me up to think I'm missing out on time spent with the person who makes me happier than anyone in the world. Maybe the death fantasies come from wanting the feeling she gives me for the rest of my life and an immense fear that the throes of reality will spoil it one day.
« Last Edit: October 19, 2013, 01:59:25 PM by LambShank »

pencil

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4175 on: October 20, 2013, 08:40:12 PM »
I would never try to kill myself, but it's not rare for me to fantasize about developing some crippling chronic illness with little chance at recovery. I just want my girlfriend to push me around in a wheelchair as I wither away. It's probably some fucked up subconscious realization that I'm taking my youth and good health for granted but I don't know, I'm pretty far away from her and it tears me up to think I'm missing out on time spent with the person who makes me happier than anyone in the world. Maybe the death fantasies come from wanting the feeling she gives me for the rest of my life and an immense fear that the throes of reality will spoil it one day.

drop acid
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LambShank

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4176 on: October 21, 2013, 05:54:45 AM »
I don't drink a lot or smoke but hallucinogens have always intrigued me so I've been considering it for a little while, what makes you recommend that?

JB

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4177 on: October 21, 2013, 07:56:32 AM »
i thought about this the other day for the first time in a while. when i was 18 i was pretty big into smoking weed, but i only made like 7 bucks an hour and worked probably less than 20 hours a week. but i really had no responsibilities besides paying for my gas, so i could spend a bunch of money on weed without too much regret. anyways, i was running low on cash and i knew i had a while before i got paid next so i decided to make some fake 20s. the plan was that me and my buddy would go buy some weed for $50, give our dealer two fake $20s and a real 10. the kid we bought from was usually baked out of his mind or super fucked up on xanax so the chance of him catching us was really low. the way i made the bills was super sketchy. we had one of those 3 in 1 inkjet printers with a copier and a scanner. all i did was measure out where the middle of one edge of the scanner was, copied the bill, then copied it again on the other side. i made 2 because my first one turned out less than perfect (go fucking figure). put them both in a pair of jeans and put them in the dryer for about 20 minutes and called it a day. if you werent checking, the bills looked ok, but if you took more than a 5 second look at then, you could easily tell they were fake. so my buddy comes by and im pretty sure i was just giving him the money and he was going to go get the weed. i might have been skating or something, but i didnt go with him. so he comes back and says he chickened out and paid with real money and gave me the fakes back. we got our weed, but this still didnt solve my problem of being low on cash. so maybe the next night, im out by myself and decided im going to try to pay with a fake bill and get the change from it. i go into cvs, pick up a gatorade or something and hand the clerk my fake 20. immediately he feels it and makes a weird face. he probably played with it for a good 5 seconds before shaking his head, putting it in the drawer and handing me the change. i was scared to death that he half way examined it, but i was sooo psyched that it actually worked and i was $18 and a gatorade richer. so a few days later, i decided to run my scam again, this time at 711. same gig, bought a drink and handed the guy my fake 20. this guy wasnt so easily fooled. he feels it and obviously he can tell the difference because computer paper doesnt feel like money at all. sets the bill down and takes out his counterfeit money marker. now ive seen people use these many times, but i cant tell you what youre supposed to look for in the markings. every time i see it on a legit bill, the mark turns a light brown, then disappears shortly after. so he marks my bill and im sweating bullets, but the mark comes out light fucking brown. dude puts it in the drawer and hands me the change. i get back to my car and im almost having a heart attack and told myself i would never do that again. i stayed away from that 711 for a good 6 to 9 months just because i was afraid of somehow getting in trouble. so the next time i go back, the same clerk is in there and im there with a few friends. one of my buddies is in line in front of me and goes to pay with a $20. the dude pulls out his marker and checks his bill, then says "sorry, i just have to make sure. some people have come up hear and paid with fake bills" and the dude gives me a blatant stare down. he fucking remembered. i paid with a card that night and have only been back to that 711 a handful of times since then. i cant even imagine what would happen if i got caught since i believe counterfeiting is a federal offense. and it wouldnt have been hard to bust me seeing as i had the legit $20 that i copied in my pocket. this might not seem that bad, but its by far the worst thing ive ever done and got away with.

pencil

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4178 on: October 21, 2013, 12:11:34 PM »
I don't drink a lot or smoke but hallucinogens have always intrigued me so I've been considering it for a little while, what makes you recommend that?

because you sound like youd trip the fuck out lol
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Merked

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4179 on: October 21, 2013, 01:29:51 PM »
JB,

If you were caught, you could have said that you aquired the fake bill from like selling something on Craigslist?  Thereafter, act fucking confused/upset that you got burned on what you sold?  It would take some acting skill but I wonder if they would be able to convict/charge you?  Like, if there is no evidence connecting you to making fisherprice printer money.  Or, if someone really did get burned on some counterfeit shit and then tried to spend it, would they be the ones liable? 

Google time.
I suck at SLAP.

pencil

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4180 on: October 21, 2013, 01:37:07 PM »
JB,

If you were caught, you could have said that you aquired the fake bill from like selling something on Craigslist?  Thereafter, act fucking confused/upset that you got burned on what you sold?  It would take some acting skill but I wonder if they would be able to convict/charge you?  Like, if there is no evidence connecting you to making fisherprice printer money.  Or, if someone really did get burned on some counterfeit shit and then tried to spend it, would they be the ones liable? 

Google time.

he clearly said he had the 20 that he used to make the fake bill in his pocket.  Thatd be a strange coincidence to have the same exact bill matching the same exact serial number on the fake
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JB

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4181 on: October 21, 2013, 05:24:05 PM »
My back story was going to be that I got paid under the table in cash from a sketchy pizza place that saw its fair share of fake money come through, which is 100% true. But if they wanted to do a simple finger print test, all they would find was mine, my friends, and the clerks and I wouldn't have tried to bring my friend into it. And I'm the worst liar in the world, so I would've been busted pretty quick.

SEAN PABLO

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4182 on: October 21, 2013, 07:17:24 PM »
My back story was going to be that I got paid under the table in cash from a sketchy pizza place that saw its fair share of fake money come through, which is 100% true. But if they wanted to do a simple finger print test, all they would find was mine, my friends, and the clerks and I wouldn't have tried to bring my friend into it. And I'm the worst liar in the world, so I would've been busted pretty quick.

STOP PROMOTING RACIST STEREOTYPES

pencil

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4183 on: October 21, 2013, 07:43:06 PM »
My back story was going to be that I got paid under the table in cash from a sketchy pizza place that saw its fair share of fake money come through, which is 100% true. But if they wanted to do a simple finger print test, all they would find was mine, my friends, and the clerks and I wouldn't have tried to bring my friend into it. And I'm the worst liar in the world, so I would've been busted pretty quick.

youd prolly get fucked in prison better shave ur chest lol
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paraquat

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4184 on: October 22, 2013, 05:04:09 AM »
JB

Fuck your backstory. The secret serv. will interigate you for days, and if paying for a Gatorade with a fake bill at a 711 makes you sweat... Uncle got popped with a fake bill unbeknownst to him. He spent a day and a half explaining to the S S how it wasn't his.

JB

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4185 on: October 22, 2013, 06:42:07 AM »
JB

Fuck your backstory. The secret serv. will interigate you for days, and if paying for a Gatorade with a fake bill at a 711 makes you sweat... Uncle got popped with a fake bill unbeknownst to him. He spent a day and a half explaining to the S S how it wasn't his.

put a real cop on the scene and i probably wouldve folded instantly. throw the secret service in there and im sure i wouldve pissed my pants while crying.

i know im super lucky i didnt get caught. i wouldve basically thrown whatever life and accomplishments i have today away for a drink and a few bucks.

pencil

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4186 on: October 22, 2013, 10:02:09 AM »
Expand Quote
JB

Fuck your backstory. The secret serv. will interigate you for days, and if paying for a Gatorade with a fake bill at a 711 makes you sweat... Uncle got popped with a fake bill unbeknownst to him. He spent a day and a half explaining to the S S how it wasn't his.
[close]

put a real cop on the scene and i probably wouldve folded instantly. throw the secret service in there and im sure i wouldve pissed my pants while crying.

i know im super lucky i didnt get caught. i wouldve basically thrown whatever life and accomplishments i have today away for a drink and a few bucks.

shit ive put myself in that situation just about every day
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JB

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4187 on: October 22, 2013, 11:15:32 AM »
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
JB

Fuck your backstory. The secret serv. will interigate you for days, and if paying for a Gatorade with a fake bill at a 711 makes you sweat... Uncle got popped with a fake bill unbeknownst to him. He spent a day and a half explaining to the S S how it wasn't his.
[close]

put a real cop on the scene and i probably wouldve folded instantly. throw the secret service in there and im sure i wouldve pissed my pants while crying.

i know im super lucky i didnt get caught. i wouldve basically thrown whatever life and accomplishments i have today away for a drink and a few bucks.
[close]

shit ive put myself in that situation just about every day


SEAN PABLO

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4188 on: October 22, 2013, 04:42:34 PM »
I LIKE ALL TYPES OF THINGS BOTH LONG AND SOFT HARD OR NOT I LOVE THEM

SUCKS

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4189 on: October 22, 2013, 05:34:26 PM »
I don't like being alone. When I'm alone, I think too much and make myself depressed. Tonight is one of those nights.

this.

and i jerk off way too much

ROCKxADIO420

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4190 on: October 22, 2013, 05:39:48 PM »
someitmes i wish my slap username wasnt in caps :'( :'( :'(

ttching!

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4191 on: October 22, 2013, 05:59:24 PM »
someitmes i wish my slap username wasnt in caps :'( :'( :'(

I'll trade you my lower case c for your upper case C.

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4192 on: October 22, 2013, 06:26:54 PM »
sometimes i worry that i have too much swag

ThugWaffle

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4193 on: October 23, 2013, 01:49:41 PM »
I like to watch bmx and rollerblading videos cause sometimes i get jaded with skating cause i know all about it and i still havent fooled around with a girl.

SodaJerk

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4194 on: October 26, 2013, 01:57:19 PM »
I like to watch bmx and rollerblading videos cause sometimes i get jaded with skating cause i know all about it and i still havent fooled around with a girl.
For reals?

JB

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4195 on: October 26, 2013, 06:55:12 PM »
I'm at my girlfriends family's Halloween party. When I go to the bathroom I just turn the water on for a few seconds instead of washing my hands.  8)

J.R.

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4196 on: October 26, 2013, 07:36:31 PM »
I'm at my girlfriends family's Halloween party. When I go to the bathroom I just turn the water on for a few seconds instead of washing my hands.  8)

Might I add that if you do in fact need to relieve yourself, I would suggest doing so in the sink. Whenever I'm somewhere that I don't want to be, I alternate between peeing in the garbage can and the sink. And no, most of the time I don't run any water after I do my thing in the sink.

JB

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4197 on: October 26, 2013, 08:08:36 PM »
GNARd

edit: WaStEd
« Last Edit: October 26, 2013, 08:11:37 PM by JB »

SodaJerk

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4198 on: October 27, 2013, 06:12:58 AM »
Expand Quote
I'm at my girlfriends family's Halloween party. When I go to the bathroom I just turn the water on for a few seconds instead of washing my hands.  8)
[close]

Might I add that if you do in fact need to relieve yourself, I would suggest doing so in the sink. Whenever I'm somewhere that I don't want to be, I alternate between peeing in the garbage can and the sink. And no, most of the time I don't run any water after I do my thing in the sink.
Anyone remember Big Brother mags game of 'Hide the Dookie'? I think it was Chris Pontius or one of the other Jackass guys way before the whole Jackass thing.

J.R.

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #4199 on: October 27, 2013, 12:15:10 PM »
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
I'm at my girlfriends family's Halloween party. When I go to the bathroom I just turn the water on for a few seconds instead of washing my hands.  8)
[close]

Might I add that if you do in fact need to relieve yourself, I would suggest doing so in the sink. Whenever I'm somewhere that I don't want to be, I alternate between peeing in the garbage can and the sink. And no, most of the time I don't run any water after I do my thing in the sink.
[close]
Anyone remember Big Brother mags game of 'Hide the Dookie'? I think it was Chris Pontius or one of the other Jackass guys way before the whole Jackass thing.

I don't recall, what was hide the dookie?