motherfuckin, people who have high minded ideals are some of the bitterest folks around. i usedta be one of them jabronis then i got wicked nihilist and now i'm pickin up the pieces. or letting them lie.
i'm not into capitalism but i'm greedy in a sense of my interests supercede anyone else's. i'm fairly considerate sans alcohol but it's a superficial jailhouse respect for people and meanwhile i will skate someone's house, maybe even do uninvited work on the structure. it's my planet and i can't fix it or destroy it but i'm out for myself in a way. not to cheat anyone and i'm really not interested in money at all but i'm pretty inured to other people's suffering than i usedta be.
for all the time i've spent squatting, my mother let this fat cunt stay upstairs after my brother subletted her a room then scared her out. now we've gotta have her evicted and she's smoking inside and stomping around and honest injun, i care more about the hardwood floors than her existence. my brother wants to kill her and i talked him out of it although if i knew he'd get away w/ it i'd be all about it. i wish death or disfigurement on her while being aware enough that i've been that fat cunt before.
i mean, usually when i'm squatting it's legit vacant not someone did me a solid then i disrespect their rules and fuck them over financially but i reappropriate whatever's around. yet i wish suffering on this upstairs fat cunt.
amongst others.
but for the most part i'm a total sweetheart.
i don't have all the answers like in my early 20s. i'm also a hell of a lot less bitter. i'm not proud of myself as if i were growing my own food and living up to my stances but if i can drink some coffee and do some grinds that's enough most of the time.