I finally resolved my ace bushing madness, I know I'm a monster, I switched the stock bushings. I bought some 94a bottoms from skatedeluxe, since the bottom bushings from ace is really tall I did this.
I put bones flat washer, indy washer, this bushing, ace top bushing, ace top washer...now I feel them stable. I you want the right height and you want a tighter ace this is a good trick I think.