It's annoying when people tell me to get a hooker for several reasons. I don't have any fucking money. If I did have regular cash flow I might consider it. Then it would just be another expense that I could afford in moderation. Maybe I'd have a prostitute schedule. Every other Wednesday night or something.
I don't know how to go about getting one. I have enough trouble talking to strangers. What makes these fools think I can proposition a professional for an illegal service? Backpage and craigslist seem sketchy as all hell.
I don't want my first time to be with a goddamn hooker. That's something I'll remember forever, and it would be nothing more than an affirmation of my inadequacy.
Don't want to sound like I'm trying to bring in perverted stuff here, but I just read this online mag article I came across that was pretty interesting and surprising. It's of some woman who wrote about webcaming to see what this webcam site in particular is all about. There's some stories about a couple of performers she interviewed & their relationships with it. Reading the article at first, I thought it might be some strictly smut expose (which maybe partially is), but reading towards the bottom half there is deeper reasoning people lives are entangled in it (or at least what being "sexual" or not is if they choose so, can mean.) Read the "Wendy", "Delany" and "Max/Harper" portions. The idea of an anonymous electronic encounter they talk about is interesting. Maybe risky and probably scary to try. From the sounds of it, it's a different way of venturing into your own sexual self-esteem/engagement and creating cyber relationships. I'm not telling you to actually become a performer or anything, but it just looks like there's other ways of sexual exploration & having experiences when it comes to such desires. It could potentially be easier & who knows; maybe more satisfying than real life struggles. Makes me see how people choose diff venues and outlets for their sexual expression in a different light. I never really considered that there is really such a thing as "Internet sexuality". Maybe it could help in a serious way or just be some crazy ass adventure...or not.
At the most its just an idea.
https://medium.com/matter/are-you-internet-sexual-1f855e113dfCareful with the page though (if u even wanna read it). There's some large webcam stills in the article (right when u open the page). Not much nudity, but definitely view it in private, so you don't gotta explain yourself to someone who sees.