I have an important meeting today and I've got to learn some stuff to teach my class, so I just gotta get this off my chest as much as possible so I can proceed with my day as best as I can...
So my 38-year-old trans friend had a birthday party Saturday. I have some anxiety, and it elevates a bit when I don't know many people at a party, so I originally told him that I didn't want to go. He convinced me to, so I brought a friend. It was awful, but I knew it was a good thing to do.
Yesterday, he called me up to tell me that the party was his plan to say goodbye to everybody, and a couple hours later, he attempted suicide. He just woke up yesterday (Monday), and that explains why he didn't answer my messages...
The thing is, I'm super bummed because I know this is going to happen so many more times. I am following the advice about being friends with a suicidal person, I always have been, but it's just so draining, especially since I don't like to hang out with people in general. It's really shitty knowing that I've prevented others from attempting suicide just with my friendship, but that didn't help with this particular buddy.