real confessions

[Baron Samedi]

I saw Kool Keith around the time Black Elvis came out. We were waiting outside the club in Santa Cruz, not the catalyst, different one I can't remember the name of. Anyway, Keith comes up the street pushing a shopping cart full of Capri Suns. During the show he was tossing snack bags full of chicken wings and Capri Suns in to crowd. People were psyched.

probably either the rio, civic auditorium or moe's alley if i had to guess

[mynameisnotjeff]

Had to post pone skate sesh yesterday and today because I cut my right nut man-scaping 

[Silky Johnson]

Had to post pone skate sesh yesterday and today because I cut my right nut man-scaping 

Shit man gotA be careful with your jewels, my scrotum is strictly scissor only nothing battery powered is going near my shit.

Edit: almost forget my confession, since cutting back on drinking I have lost contact with pretty much all my friends, the only text message I have gotten in the past couple of weeks have been from my manager from work and my mother, at least I have extra spending money from having no social life though. :|

[Jake From State Farm]

My horoscope is so fucking spot on this week. I don't read those things too often but with everything in my personal life and work life going on, hearing what I want to hear is legitimately scary.

[lickcakes]

I've been into this one dude for a 1.5 years now, but I'm becoming bored... Any sense of novelty is gone. That might just be because I'm going on a date with a PhD candidate tomorrow, and a couple on Sunday. I can't see myself ever being with just one person.

Lil B: He's so fucking full of energy and is definitely unique in how he approaches music and hip-hop. I have yet to find another musician make me laugh as hard as him. However, I can only take two songs in a row at most.

[7 year old]

to me, it sounds like you dont really love your partner.
just throwing it out there, never been in a relationship that long with someone so i have no point of reference.

[iKobrakai]

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Had to post pone skate sesh yesterday and today because I cut my right nut man-scaping 

[close]

Shit man gotA be careful with your jewels, my scrotum is strictly scissor only nothing battery powered is going near my shit.

Edit: almost forget my confession, since cutting back on drinking I have lost contact with pretty much all my friends, the only text message I have gotten in the past couple of weeks have been from my manager from work and my mother, at least I have extra spending money from having no social life though. :|

Yeah, I cut my ballsack once while shaving as well, the scar was there for years. Bleading in penile area is pretty intense.

Silky, I dont want to preach, but are you sure those were your friends to begin with?

[Silky Johnson]

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Had to post pone skate sesh yesterday and today because I cut my right nut man-scaping 

[close]

Shit man gotA be careful with your jewels, my scrotum is strictly scissor only nothing battery powered is going near my shit.

Edit: almost forget my confession, since cutting back on drinking I have lost contact with pretty much all my friends, the only text message I have gotten in the past couple of weeks have been from my manager from work and my mother, at least I have extra spending money from having no social life though. :|

[close]

Yeah, I cut my ballsack once while shaving as well, the scar was there for years. Bleading in penile area is pretty intense.

Silky, I dont want to preach, but are you sure those were your friends to begin with?

Apparently not, I've been going through the same thing with this particular group of people for a while, they all smoke really heavy amounts of weed and it's pretty much what they're worlds revolve around, I stopped smoking a while ago and only really had drinking in common with them and the occasional skate session when they're were actually up for it.

[Silky Johnson]

I get really paranoid walking down the street, I feel as if walking down the same streets all the time will make seem suspicious to the residents of the neighborhood so I switch up where I walk, even if I'm up to nothing bad I feel as if eyes are glued to me when I'm walking/ skating anywhere, i then go on the defensive and tend to limit my interactions with people walking by me and I feel I come of as a dick.

[mynameisnotjeff]

I get really paranoid walking down the street, I feel as if walking down the same streets all the time will make seem suspicious to the residents of the neighborhood so I switch up where I walk, even if I'm up to nothing bad I feel as if eyes are glued to me when I'm walking/ skating anywhere, i then go on the defensive and tend to limit my interactions with people walking by me and I feel I come of as a dick.

I'm a psych student and today we looked at Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. As lame as this sounds the first person that came to mind was you. I think it's awesome that you decided to cut back and drink less. While you may lose friends it is important to keep going and find new ones, you don't need people like them around. I'm willing to listen if you need to talk with anyone.

[buttchin]

Im such a pussy when it comes to women. I get super anxious and I can never make the first move or keep a good conversation going

[Tufty]

Im such a pussy when it comes to women. I get super anxious and I can never make the first move or keep a good conversation going

my first real girlfriend told me that girls are not that complicated. They just want someone that makes em laugh. It's easy when most women have shit humour.

[Monkey_Mcpott]

Skateboarding has become really hard for me lately. Of course being an adult now you cant skate everyday like when you were a kid but have now got a better schedule as of lately so i plan to skate 2-3 times a week but getting comfortable/confident on a board has been hard. Literally every trick seems like a 50/50 chance of me making it, which can be fun/exciting in its own way.

I also find it really hard to skate by myself. If none of my skate buds come along i find it really weird pumping myself up. I tend to skate better and have the most fun when I vibe with good friends.

[BraveUlysses*]

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I'm a hip and happening 20 year old boy but I really don't get how so many people enjoy Lil B's music. With most music even if I think it's bad I feel like I can step outside of myself and at least understand how someone can like it but with him I just really can't. I like a lot of music that isn't "good" but his music is really unlistenable to me. I'd still rather listen to it than hopsin or tech n9ne or sum shit like that tho.

[close]

I don't even know who Lil'B is, real talk, I'm old for real. What I'm most surprised about is that Brave Ulysses is at 5 posts? What the fuck man, did you focus? You were always one of my favourite posters and I didn't notice you were gone.

Kool Keith is amazing and a friend of mine promoted one of his tours an told me some weird stories about him. Apparently he had some requests on tour like going to "the best toy store" so he could play with Hot Wheels cars but not purchase them.

Haha I deleted it just to start a new one. I had started posting on that account 5 years ago when I was 16 and I really hated how easy it was for me to go back and read my posts at that age and even posts last year when I was pathetically depressed all the time.

[shark tits]

i was jerking off to lily allen like i'd open a picture then run to the toilet and close my eyes but i lost it so i came back, looked at the screen, different lily allen picture, run back to the toilet a 2nd time and loose my boner again. erectile dysfunction? am i gonna hafta coax a brazilian spider to bite me to the point of priapism? i've had drunk dick a million times or dope dick but i think i'm just regular nowadays [unless methadone counts?].
i'll try again one of these days but that's pretty scary, can't recall it ever happening w/out heavily indulging in substances prior.

[iKobrakai]

i was jerking off to lily allen like i'd open a picture then run to the toilet and close my eyes but i lost it so i came back, looked at the screen, different lily allen picture, run back to the toilet a 2nd time and loose my boner again. erectile dysfunction? am i gonna hafta coax a brazilian spider to bite me to the point of priapism? i've had drunk dick a million times or dope dick but i think i'm just regular nowadays [unless methadone counts?].
i'll try again one of these days but that's pretty scary, can't recall it ever happening w/out heavily indulging in substances prior.

Fuck, you of all people should know:

"A study of more than 1,000 adults showed the men who were treated with methadone had roughly one-quarter of the testosterone found in men who did not use opioid drugs."

http://www.webmd.com/mental-health/news/20140905/methadone-lowers-testosterone-men

Some go even as far as getting testo shots. I remember that shit. At first it was awesome, I was able to control my junk for an hour and a half and then blow my load on command. Three years later I was a pussy. Dont miss those days at all.

[JB]

i was jerking off to lily allen like i'd open a picture then run to the toilet and close my eyes but i lost it so i came back, looked at the screen, different lily allen picture, run back to the toilet a 2nd time and loose my boner again. erectile dysfunction? am i gonna hafta coax a brazilian spider to bite me to the point of priapism? i've had drunk dick a million times or dope dick but i think i'm just regular nowadays [unless methadone counts?].
i'll try again one of these days but that's pretty scary, can't recall it ever happening w/out heavily indulging in substances prior.

if only it were for sharktits

[shark tits]

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i was jerking off to lily allen like i'd open a picture then run to the toilet and close my eyes but i lost it so i came back, looked at the screen, different lily allen picture, run back to the toilet a 2nd time and loose my boner again. erectile dysfunction? am i gonna hafta coax a brazilian spider to bite me to the point of priapism? i've had drunk dick a million times or dope dick but i think i'm just regular nowadays [unless methadone counts?].
i'll try again one of these days but that's pretty scary, can't recall it ever happening w/out heavily indulging in substances prior.

[close]

Fuck, you of all people should know:

"A study of more than 1,000 adults showed the men who were treated with methadone had roughly one-quarter of the testosterone found in men who did not use opioid drugs."

http://www.webmd.com/mental-health/news/20140905/methadone-lowers-testosterone-men

Some go even as far as getting testo shots. I remember that shit. At first it was awesome, I was able to control my junk for an hour and a half and then blow my load on command. Three years later I was a pussy. Dont miss those days at all.

jeesh! i don't know what to make of that. maybe i should look into suboxin if possible although i feel like the side effects from that are prolly worse and just unknown as of yet.
yeah, JB, if only! i didn't like how she was getting lipo in the beginning while i'm eating ice cream. don't ruin my cone, lily.

[iKobrakai]

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i was jerking off to lily allen like i'd open a picture then run to the toilet and close my eyes but i lost it so i came back, looked at the screen, different lily allen picture, run back to the toilet a 2nd time and loose my boner again. erectile dysfunction? am i gonna hafta coax a brazilian spider to bite me to the point of priapism? i've had drunk dick a million times or dope dick but i think i'm just regular nowadays [unless methadone counts?].
i'll try again one of these days but that's pretty scary, can't recall it ever happening w/out heavily indulging in substances prior.

[close]

Fuck, you of all people should know:

"A study of more than 1,000 adults showed the men who were treated with methadone had roughly one-quarter of the testosterone found in men who did not use opioid drugs."

http://www.webmd.com/mental-health/news/20140905/methadone-lowers-testosterone-men

Some go even as far as getting testo shots. I remember that shit. At first it was awesome, I was able to control my junk for an hour and a half and then blow my load on command. Three years later I was a pussy. Dont miss those days at all.

[close]

jeesh! i don't know what to make of that. maybe i should look into suboxin if possible although i feel like the side effects from that are prolly worse and just unknown as of yet.
yeah, JB, if only! i didn't like how she was getting lipo in the beginning while i'm eating ice cream. don't ruin my cone, lily.

I have no idea how these things work in the states, but get Subutex or Temgesic, not Subuxone! Subutex is the original pure buprenorphine pill without Naloxone in it. The side effects you are talking about are usually caused by Naloxane, even though most doctors will never admit it. Also, even though both pills contain the same active substance all junkies will agree that the cheaper Subuxone is fucking useless.

I dont know what dosage of slime you drink every day, (90-120 mg?), but I can almost gurantee that long term effects of equivalent dosage of Subutex are gonna be less harmful. I remember the side effect of methadone were pretty gnarly, buprenorphine is way smoother. Check the link for more info:

http://www.naabt.org/documents/Suboxone_Dosing_guide.pdf

Edit:

Couple of things I forgot:

1) If you gonna switch from slime to Subutex, you will have to wait for AT LEAST 72 hours. Do not listen to dumb ass doctors that will tell any shorter amount of time. Slime has a gnarly half life and stores in your body forever. I took just a tiny dose of Subutex more than 72 hours and went into heavy withdrawal.

2) The side effects are known. Most of my junkie friends were either on one or the other. Those on Subutex are in much better shape, even after 8+ years in the program.

3) If you ever decide to kick your maintance substance, Subutex is way better, slime is much, much worse.

4) Subutex might be more expensive, but trust me, it is worth it.

5) NEVER mix buprenorphine with other opiates. EVER!

Good luck, i hope that you will get completely clean and sober some day. Im sure you dont want to be tied to a fucking clinic for the rest of your life, those places are purgatory.

[shark tits]

slime? i prefer the benevolent 'juice'. yeah, i'm at 68 and was thinking about going up but we'll see. i made the mistake of shooting a suboxin once when i apparently still had dope in my system. instant w/drawal LAMF! but i'll never shoot a sub again so maybe it was a good thing.
i don't know, i'm not a big fan of either but i don't know if i'm good enough at quitting on my own. might ride this horse for a year-ish and try to get down to just a few mgs and maybe a few vicodans or something to come off of that [pretty sure it's easier to go back to pills or heroin and quit that since the w/drawal is only a few days].

[iKobrakai]

slime? i prefer the benevolent 'juice'. yeah, i'm at 68 and was thinking about going up but we'll see. i made the mistake of shooting a suboxin once when i apparently still had dope in my system. instant w/drawal LAMF! but i'll never shoot a sub again so maybe it was a good thing.
i don't know, i'm not a big fan of either but i don't know if i'm good enough at quitting on my own. might ride this horse for a year-ish and try to get down to just a few mgs and maybe a few vicodans or something to come off of that [pretty sure it's easier to go back to pills or heroin and quit that since the w/drawal is only a few days].

Eh, come on bro. You are talking to another ex-fiend here... It is always "Im just gonna" / "Just a bit more" with us  .
By no means do I want to diminish your struggle, we all know how that shit goes. Im just sceptical about this junk-juice-junk trip. Sounds like a good way to re-unite with your dead friends. You and I both know too many bad examples.

Hope you are not taking this as preach. I hope you will get better soon!

[shark tits]

i don't think you're preaching. you might have a point w/ the rationalizations and 'just a little' type talk but in my case, i'm about a month off cigs [2 months off of smoking w/ any regularity] and 2 months since any dope at all. i'm just a babe in the woods is what i mean by picking a 'year=ish' before i step down. i'm scared if i were to get off methadone today that w/drawal notwithstanding, i'd relapse. throw in 30 days of misery and for sure i'm relapsing but i just don't think i've had enough time away and gotten deep enough into mopeds and beekeeping [cause just skating was not enough to keep me straight obviously].
i'm half joking about returning to real opiates to soften the brunt of w/drawal but 3 days does sound a lot better than 30. prolly i'll look into suboxine down the road and try to break em in half and ween myself.
congrats on being further down that road than me!

[SodaJerk]

I'd be stoked if you could quit that life all together Sharktits. I believe in you.

[shark tits]

I'd be stoked if you could quit that life all together Sharktits. I believe in you.

thanks soda-j. i would like to too. i feel miles better than when i was shooting stuff and i've been able to acquire mopeds and pick a random friend every month to send $50 to and still have money for buying plants and bees once spring gets here. i've never had my shit together so well even though i've had periods of sobriety and even one or 2 while i was working and skating. absolutely i don't want to be on maintenance drugs forever to stay off more serious drugs but right now it's certainly helping and my favorite thing about not being desperate is being able to cut off contact w/ people you don't like. when you're struggling sometimes you have to deal w/ people you hate because  they'll buy your scripts or they've got a phone number or whatever the case is.
same w/ cigarettes and alcohol, when it's my time i'm just able to walk away but up until then there was no way i could stop. i don't understand it but something changes and you're just done.

[iKobrakai]

Everyone has their own path, I hope you will find your way Shark!

[Gray Imp Sausage Metal]

I'd be stoked if you could quit that life all together Sharktits. I believe in you.

faaark, harsh much?

[SodaJerk]

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I'd be stoked if you could quit that life all together Sharktits. I believe in you.

[close]

faaark, harsh much?

Huh? I said quit "that" life, not life all together.

[the snake]

thanks for the inspiration sharktits, i'll do the 100 push-up thing each day too

[shark tits]

thanks for the inspiration sharktits, i'll do the 100 push-up thing each day too

do it up snake! but ^ that guy is still gonna kick both our asses, one w/ each hand.

[Dontfearthereefer]

I don't love my girlfriend but we got a kid.