Author Topic: real confessions  (Read 1662898 times)

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ChuckRamone

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7320 on: December 16, 2017, 09:38:49 AM »
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my workplace is an old house converted into an office and it has thin walls. I sit close to the women’s bathroom and I can hear them peeing and farting. every once in a while one of them will have an explosive shit session and I find myself getting strangely aroused by it. if I smelled it or saw the shit, I probably wouldn’t be that stoked but hearing a girl rip some spluttering farts and bombard the toilet gives me a bit of an erection. the downside to this is I also have to hear my male coworkers’ butt sounds coming from the other bathroom and I don’t really like that.
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It's a slippery slope from listening Tom bathroom boners to spending your kids college fund on a motel room Cleveland steamer.
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Sounds slippery indeed.
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every once in a while you'll read in news of the weird about a guy who hacks his way into women's toilets to satisfy his urolagnia. let it rain down like manna from heaven!
idk the ins and outs of plumbing but i see vocational school in your future.

but a real fecophile would take it to the sewers so you could go macro level and get a whole shit deluge from multiple women at once.

Gray Imp Sausage Metal

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7321 on: December 17, 2017, 06:24:22 PM »
scat bukkake?

"This is untrue, my client has not been attacked in every country" #endlesstoecapsforthepuffyfooter

Grind King Rims

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7322 on: December 17, 2017, 06:29:21 PM »

Gray Imp Sausage Metal

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7323 on: December 17, 2017, 06:32:45 PM »

"This is untrue, my client has not been attacked in every country" #endlesstoecapsforthepuffyfooter

Mongoloid

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7324 on: December 18, 2017, 02:08:36 PM »
I've discovered the holy grail of sorts of sex acts, and I think I am now forever a changed Mongoloid. The girl that I've been on/off with for whatever reason took the plunge and went all in on my hairy ass forest. I never thought a rimjob could be so fucking great, but here I am a learned and informed individual. She not only attacked my browneye with wreckless abandon, she did so for 20 minutes straight.

She also gave the best head I'll probably ever experience, and it was fucking straight up pornographic. her mouth was like a dick seeking vacuum, and anytime I'd fall out of her makeshift "mouth butthole" she'd rove the carpet and suck the ole' hotdog back into her mouth like it was the last missing piece of the cocksuck puzzle.

The only drawback to this encounter was the fact that I'm off fucking squirters now. My bed smells like a stale can of tuna, and everything needs to be washed and/or burned.

mynameisnotjeff

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7325 on: December 18, 2017, 05:32:44 PM »
Nothing I do deserves more than an iphone camera.

Joe Pesci

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7326 on: December 18, 2017, 06:24:22 PM »

She also gave the best head I'll probably ever experience, and it was fucking straight up pornographic. her mouth was like a dick seeking vacuum,
This is the kind of thing that will make you lose your mind, I've unfortunately only been with 1 girl that really knew how to give blowjobs and it was like coma inducing. No other girl has even really got me close to finishing from head, but this one girl could make it take 30 seconds. My theory is that her hands were some crazy soft texture or something.

Gray Imp Sausage Metal

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7327 on: December 18, 2017, 06:46:51 PM »
20 min tongue punch of the gnar button and she was doing it to YOU? sounds like a keeper mate

"This is untrue, my client has not been attacked in every country" #endlesstoecapsforthepuffyfooter

Mongoloid

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7328 on: December 18, 2017, 07:12:46 PM »
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She also gave the best head I'll probably ever experience, and it was fucking straight up pornographic. her mouth was like a dick seeking vacuum,
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This is the kind of thing that will make you lose your mind, I've unfortunately only been with 1 girl that really knew how to give blowjobs and it was like coma inducing. No other girl has even really got me close to finishing from head, but this one girl could make it take 30 seconds. My theory is that her hands were some crazy soft texture or something.

I'm fairly confident I'll never get a blowjob by anyone else the way in which she skillfully performed it. This shit was like performance art by a skilled master in the dark arts of dick.

20 min tongue punch of the gnar button and she was doing it to YOU? sounds like a keeper mate

She loved it, I think she enjoyed doing it as much as I surprisingly enjoyed receiving it. She was manipulating my legs all over the place as she was doing it, and she was really getting in there.. which for those of you whom have seen my taint photo you know that's some Vietnam-esque trooper level shit.

straight

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7329 on: December 18, 2017, 09:05:05 PM »
rip
What kind of mikey taylor logic is this?

fulltechnicalskizzy

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7330 on: December 18, 2017, 10:35:16 PM »
Keeper.

Esquivel

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7331 on: December 19, 2017, 01:43:44 AM »
^This has to be SLAP's most famous life gnar button of all time.
Also, who coined the term? If i find out, the gnar button will be on auto pilot until the end of time.

Mark Renton

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7332 on: December 19, 2017, 03:01:09 AM »
video tape yourself saving monks. dont just do it. make sure its caught on film.

SodaJerk

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7333 on: December 19, 2017, 04:25:33 AM »
^This has to be SLAP's most famous life gnar button of all time.
Also, who coined the term? If i find out, the gnar button will be on auto pilot until the end of time.
I'm not gonna take full credit but I was involved in coining the term.

bawtawd5

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7334 on: December 19, 2017, 04:35:50 PM »
Ain't showered in 3 days, could do a fourth

shit_for_brains

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7335 on: December 19, 2017, 05:05:24 PM »
That is shocking

tobey

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7336 on: December 19, 2017, 05:39:30 PM »
Ain't showered in 3 days, could do a fourth

I wear the same underwear/socks for a couple days in a row

bawtawd5

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7337 on: December 19, 2017, 05:42:25 PM »
Made it like 5 or  six one time. Don't remember smell, but I was an oily guy.

Confession- I stole over $500 retail last 2 days and ain finna stop right now, I'm too fuckin fresh.. They think all the Mexicans are the ones stealing shit,fuckin mexicans

Joe Pesci

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7338 on: December 19, 2017, 05:43:42 PM »
Ain't showered in 3 days, could do a fourth
I had a theory that this would help you with skating a couple years ago, like if you took a hot shower it would mess with your muscles by warming them up without being used. As it turns out, there isn't much of a correlation

Hacksaw Jim Duggan

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7339 on: December 20, 2017, 07:58:36 AM »
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Ain't showered in 3 days, could do a fourth
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I wear the same underwear/socks for a couple days in a row

I don't even wear underwear, haven't even owned a pair in years. I would recommend it, great for skating.

tobey

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7340 on: December 20, 2017, 08:17:38 AM »
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Ain't showered in 3 days, could do a fourth
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I wear the same underwear/socks for a couple days in a row
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I don't even wear underwear, haven't even owned a pair in years. I would recommend it, great for skating.


Grind King Rims

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7341 on: December 20, 2017, 08:37:50 AM »
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^This has to be SLAP's most famous life gnar button of all time.
Also, who coined the term? If i find out, the gnar button will be on auto pilot until the end of time.
[close]
I'm not gonna take full credit but I was involved in coining the term.

After eating some Asian ass, asakusa75 said, "I wish there was such a thing as a life gnar because I would give myself one," and Soda Jerk said, "The Life Gnar button exists and it's inside every Asian girls butthole."

So began the life gnar button

poophole

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7342 on: December 20, 2017, 02:33:37 PM »
a couple years back i was working at nyt mag and lost the job when i failed a drug test

shark tits

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7343 on: December 20, 2017, 02:37:46 PM »
a couple years back i was working at nyt mag and lost the job when i failed a drug test
shaggy?

bawtawd5

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7344 on: December 21, 2017, 12:16:06 AM »
Made it another day, do it tomorroeow. I like 2nd day
 when hair it starts
To get oily

Pigeon

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7345 on: December 21, 2017, 12:29:53 AM »
Made it another day, do it tomorroeow. I like 2nd day
 when hair it starts
To get oily
Shave your hair and/or get a gym membership.

bawtawd5

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7346 on: December 21, 2017, 12:54:28 AM »
Hah nah my hair my power it be pullin batches. That shit fire


I'm not gonna shave my head tuck my shirt ne a Nazi like ben k, got me fucked up

jomeara1

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7347 on: December 22, 2017, 05:36:29 PM »
Honestly, I miss Tracer.

Mongoloid

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7348 on: December 22, 2017, 07:04:32 PM »
Truthfully, I don’t miss Chodekaka.

fulltechnicalskizzy

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Re: real confessions
« Reply #7349 on: December 22, 2017, 08:09:36 PM »
Nobody does but it is weird to think that he might be dead by his own hand yet to be found in a Walmart parking lot at this very moment.