real confessions

[mynameisnotjeff]

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

College is hard. man. fuck. Really blowing it

[close]

Is it too hard? Or are you just slacking? I did the second one.

[close]

Both, I guess. My senior thesis is coming along pretty good, I started it early last semester and I'm on good terms with my advisor, but I'm taking Calc 1 and getting my ass kicked. Calc 1. a class that high school sophomores take

[close]

Math classes can be quite the bitch. Have you looked into tutoring? Or maybe you could find someone in your class that’s really good at it and just have them help out.

This as well as reach out to the teacher. They're in charge of your grades and can curve it for you. As well as attempt to explain things in a way that you can understand.

[iKobrakai]

Since most books on Calculus are pure horse shit, tutorials on Youtube worked better for me. They explain concepts much better.

Does not apply to the Chinese.

[50mm]

Since most books on Calculus are pure horse shit, tutorials on Youtube worked better for me. They explain concepts much better.

Does not apply to the Chinese.

Never took any math after geometry which I got Ds in but I was able to explain my girlfriends high level stats homework to her after I watched a YouTube video.

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

I’m kinda obsessed with this girl I matched with on tinder and she responds to my messages and seems rad and cool about things but we never met. We work in the same industry and matched during a huge industry event in a city that neither of us live in so meeting will be impossible in reality but for some reason I can’t let it go. It’s embarrassing and pathetic.

[close]

Plane tickets b cheap mane

Y'all are both on tinder for a reason tho

[close]

It's cool Tinder's wholesome now

Met my girl online and so glad I did. Sent a message and told my friend there’s no way a girl like that would respond and then she did when I was telling him. Found the best girl in the world.

[Dr-Feelgood]

I’m kinda obsessed with this girl I matched with on tinder and she responds to my messages and seems rad and cool about things but we never met. We work in the same industry and matched during a huge industry event in a city that neither of us live in so meeting will be impossible in reality but for some reason I can’t let it go. It’s embarrassing and pathetic.

its easy to hang onto things man, how far she live from you? If you guys are talking daily, maybe organise a little holiday meet up, see how it goes

[shitsandwich]

Since most books on Calculus are pure horse shit, tutorials on Youtube worked better for me. They explain concepts much better.

Does not apply to the Chinese.

I really should be getting my degree from Youtube because the professors at my university and their textbooks don't help much.

[Mark Renton]

Word. Passed an exam on partial differential equations using only YouTube. Never went to class because the exam was registered in the wrong semester. Book was Arab to me while I found a really good channel with everything on it. Saved my ass.

[iKobrakai]

Word. Passed an exam on partial differential equations using only YouTube. Never went to class because the exam was registered in the wrong semester. Book was Arab to me while I found a really good channel with everything on it. Saved my ass.

Bro... Those assholes would always insist on using "the latest edition", as well. My question is "why?"... It's not like the Calculus has changed or the authors got better at expaining things... For a 100+ bucks per book.

[Audrey II]

i enjoyed the phantom menace. there i said it.

[DarthDingusMaximus]

i enjoyed the phantom menace. there i said it.

prequels weren’t so bad compared to recently.

[mynameisnotjeff]

Expand Quote

i enjoyed the phantom menace. there i said it.

[close]

prequels weren’t so bad compared to recently.

While this is like comparing anyone to hitler. I do give my dues to episode 3. The special effects and fight scenes were enjoyable. I enjoyed the improvements to the SPFX in the prequels. As for the new ones, they took a left turn into a dumpster fire

[fulltechnicalskizzy]

Rogue One was the shit I wanna die on a planet

[Painted Baby]

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

i enjoyed the phantom menace. there i said it.

[close]

prequels weren’t so bad compared to recently.

[close]

While this is like comparing anyone to hitler. I do give my dues to episode 3. The special effects and fight scenes were enjoyable. I enjoyed the improvements to the SPFX in the prequels. As for the new ones, they took a left turn into a dumpster fire

This is definitely the best version

[mynameisnotjeff]

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

i enjoyed the phantom menace. there i said it.

[close]

prequels weren’t so bad compared to recently.

[close]

While this is like comparing anyone to hitler. I do give my dues to episode 3. The special effects and fight scenes were enjoyable. I enjoyed the improvements to the SPFX in the prequels. As for the new ones, they took a left turn into a dumpster fire

[close]

This is definitely the best version

Amazing haha

Rogue One was the shit I wanna die on a planet

I said took. Rogue One was really good.

[Mongoloid]

I’ve time and again found myself coming here to explain what skateboarding means to me, and instantly delete my story.

Skateboarding was an escape from heartache.

[beatifk]

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

I’m kinda obsessed with this girl I matched with on tinder and she responds to my messages and seems rad and cool about things but we never met. We work in the same industry and matched during a huge industry event in a city that neither of us live in so meeting will be impossible in reality but for some reason I can’t let it go. It’s embarrassing and pathetic.

[close]

Plane tickets b cheap mane

Y'all are both on tinder for a reason tho

[close]

It's cool Tinder's wholesome now

[close]

Met my girl online and so glad I did. Sent a message and told my friend there’s no way a girl like that would respond and then she did when I was telling him. Found the best girl in the world.

Thanks all y'all for the advice.

I told her how I'm feeling and let's just say the next time we're in the same city we have some fun activities planned.

[Painted Baby]

To celebrate Verso finally dropping, last night I watched a black guy on white girl and a white guy on black girl porn at the same time. It was accidental but maybe subliminally inspired.

[blurst_of_times]

Expand Quote

Expand Quote

i enjoyed the phantom menace. there i said it.

[close]

prequels weren’t so bad compared to recently.

[close]

While this is like comparing anyone to hitler. I do give my dues to episode 3. The special effects and fight scenes were enjoyable. I enjoyed the improvements to the SPFX in the prequels. As for the new ones, they took a left turn into a dumpster fire

I thoroughly enjoyed and still enjoy Episode 3

[blurst_of_times]

I’ve time and again found myself coming here to explain what skateboarding means to me, and instantly delete my story.

Skateboarding was an escape from heartache.

Next time, don't delete it. I'd love to read your story. Skateboarding saved me from a neglectful family life, so I am interested in hearing about how these useless wooden toys of ours have saved so many lives

[L33Tg33k]

Star Wars fuckin sucks. Trek life, nigga.

[mynameisnotjeff]

Expand Quote

I’ve time and again found myself coming here to explain what skateboarding means to me, and instantly delete my story.

Skateboarding was an escape from heartache.

[close]

Next time, don't delete it. I'd love to read your story. Skateboarding saved me from a neglectful family life, so I am interested in hearing about how these useless wooden toys of ours have saved so many lives

I back this!


To add on to the thread. I'm in a weird stage where I'm trying to figure myself out. I kinda started going out a bit more now that I have a job but, I'm not financially responsible. With that to set the stage at the job I work at a co-worker told me she was talking to another co-worker that we'd look good together. I don't see her that much in that way but, she's nice and I can make fun of her and she'll make fun of me too but, I'm not sold completely. It made me think that maybe my problem has been that I've only been into shitty women.

[Pho King Hung Lo Mein]

BACK STORY

In my early 20s, my roommate had a fight with his gf.  I was at work at the time, so didn't witness it, and the details aren't crystal clear, but basically, he threw the bitch off our 2nd story balcony and landed himself in county.

Me being his roomy and only "friend", I was his phone call.

Pho', I need you to bail me out, I have 10g stashed in the cupboard. 

Wait, WTF happened?  My girl said you threw Breanna off the fucking balcony? 

"Thats not how it happened, you need to check your bitch".

Should I throw her off the balcony?

"Funny, dick!  Will you stop fucking around and find the money, please?

I'm looking where you told me bud, but theres no money here.  It's fucking GONE bro.

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?? NO FUCKING WAY??? WHAT THE MOTHERFUCK?

Calm down cock breath, I'm fucking with you, it's right here.

OH MY FUCKING GOD, ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME???

Yes, I was kidding.  Try to relax man, I'll be on my way , just give me a few,  I'm gonna grab a cat nap, shit, shower, shave, clean out the refrigerator and re-wire the home theater system real quick, I should be there in about 20 minutes.

Dude, come on man.  Please stop fucking around.

Okay buddy, sit tight, I'll be down in a Jiffy.  Oh, and John?

Yeah?

Don't drop the soap! (Click).

SUCH a world class prick I was, considering his situation, but to me, it was just the everyday, relentless ball breaking that characterized our friendship.  What difference did it make to me that little bitch was hard-timing it after a measly 4 hours in the tank.  After he got out I was right back on him too.  So buddy, tell me, you still playing tight end?  Or did Bubba move you to wide receiver?

CONFESSION

I didn't go straight to the Jail.  I took his 10k down to the casino and played Pai Gow at 1k a hand x 3 hands.  At one point I was down 9k.  With my balls shriveled to tic-tacs and my asshole puckered to a decimal point, I limped over to BJ with the last 1k and went on a fucking miracle rush.  Over the course of about 90 minutes, I had lost and then gained back precisely 9k.  Cashed out even, drove to the jail, sprung the homie, and never said a fucking word.  Until now.

[L33Tg33k]

That time in TJ doesn't count because it wasn't a woman that I formed any sort of relationship with. It was a transaction, and a bad one at that. I still don't know how to talk to a woman that I'm interested in and have never formed a relationship, no matter how shallow. I mostly wasn't a participant as much as I was an observer. It was a thing that happened to me rather than a thing that I was doing and made happen with the express consent of someone else. The whole time I was uncomfortable and didn't have any agency on how the interaction was to go down. I was told told to lay down on my back and that's all I did. Above all it lacked the thing that I most crave; intamacy. I want to be with a a woman that wants to be with me. I want to participate in the interchange. I've still never done this and it is inconceivable that others wouldn't understand this. If you want to limit definitions to the most  denotative ideas that they inspire, then sure, that's where I lost my virginity. But if you want to live by the connotative, then no, I've experienced nothing because I've no concept of the intimacy I crave.

[L33Tg33k]

Also I'm on a bar right now and I have spoken to any woman that I have the slightest interest in. I'm a bitch.

[Dr-Feelgood]

BACK STORY

In my early 20s, my roommate had a fight with his gf.  I was at work at the time, so didn't witness it, and the details aren't crystal clear, but basically, he threw the bitch off our 2nd story balcony and landed himself in county.

Me being his roomy and only "friend", I was his phone call.

Pho', I need you to bail me out, I have 10g stashed in the cupboard. 

Wait, WTF happened?  My girl said you threw Breanna off the fucking balcony? 

"Thats not how it happened, you need to check your bitch".

Should I throw her off the balcony?

"Funny, dick!  Will you stop fucking around and find the money, please?

I'm looking where you told me bud, but theres no money here.  It's fucking GONE bro.

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?? NO FUCKING WAY??? WHAT THE MOTHERFUCK?

Calm down cock breath, I'm fucking with you, it's right here.

OH MY FUCKING GOD, ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME???

Yes, I was kidding.  Try to relax man, I'll be on my way , just give me a few,  I'm gonna grab a cat nap, shit, shower, shave, clean out the refrigerator and re-wire the home theater system real quick, I should be there in about 20 minutes.

Dude, come on man.  Please stop fucking around.

Okay buddy, sit tight, I'll be down in a Jiffy.  Oh, and John?

Yeah?

Don't drop the soap! (Click).

SUCH a world class prick I was, considering his situation, but to me, it was just the everyday, relentless ball breaking that characterized our friendship.  What difference did it make to me that little bitch was hard-timing it after a measly 4 hours in the tank.  After he got out I was right back on him too.  So buddy, tell me, you still playing tight end?  Or did Bubba move you to wide receiver?

CONFESSION

I didn't go straight to the Jail.  I took his 10k down to the casino and played Pai Gow at 1k a hand x 3 hands.  At one point I was down 9k.  With my balls shriveled to tic-tacs and my asshole puckered to a decimal point, I limped over to BJ with the last 1k and went on a fucking miracle rush.  Over the course of about 90 minutes, I had lost and then gained back precisely 9k.  Cashed out even, drove to the jail, sprung the homie, and never said a fucking word.  Until now.

you're a fucken dork

[Painted Baby]

That time in TJ doesn't count because it wasn't a woman that I formed any sort of relationship with. It was a transaction, and a bad one at that. I still don't know how to talk to a woman that I'm interested in and have never formed a relationship, no matter how shallow. I mostly wasn't a participant as much as I was an observer. It was a thing that happened to me rather than a thing that I was doing and made happen with the express consent of someone else. The whole time I was uncomfortable and didn't have any agency on how the interaction was to go down. I was told told to lay down on my back and that's all I did. Above all it lacked the thing that I most crave; intamacy. I want to be with a a woman that wants to be with me. I want to participate in the interchange. I've still never done this and it is inconceivable that others wouldn't understand this. If you want to limit definitions to the most  denotative ideas that they inspire, then sure, that's where I lost my virginity. But if you want to live by the connotative, then no, I've experienced nothing because I've no concept of the intimacy I crave.

My bad. I get that the intimacy is kinda the main thing. Ya can't really buy that.

I will say you're pretty assertive and direct when you wanna be on here and you also have jokes so I think if you either figure out how to start pulling that of IRL or go all in on the digital space with it you could probably start getting somewhere. The adult side of Reddit is popping right now.

[Pho King Hung Lo Mein]

Expand Quote

BACK STORY

In my early 20s, my roommate had a fight with his gf.  I was at work at the time, so didn't witness it, and the details aren't crystal clear, but basically, he threw the bitch off our 2nd story balcony and landed himself in county.

Me being his roomy and only "friend", I was his phone call.

Pho', I need you to bail me out, I have 10g stashed in the cupboard. 

Wait, WTF happened?  My girl said you threw Breanna off the fucking balcony? 

"Thats not how it happened, you need to check your bitch".

Should I throw her off the balcony?

"Funny, dick!  Will you stop fucking around and find the money, please?

I'm looking where you told me bud, but theres no money here.  It's fucking GONE bro.

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?? NO FUCKING WAY??? WHAT THE MOTHERFUCK?

Calm down cock breath, I'm fucking with you, it's right here.

OH MY FUCKING GOD, ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME???

Yes, I was kidding.  Try to relax man, I'll be on my way , just give me a few,  I'm gonna grab a cat nap, shit, shower, shave, clean out the refrigerator and re-wire the home theater system real quick, I should be there in about 20 minutes.

Dude, come on man.  Please stop fucking around.

Okay buddy, sit tight, I'll be down in a Jiffy.  Oh, and John?

Yeah?

Don't drop the soap! (Click).

SUCH a world class prick I was, considering his situation, but to me, it was just the everyday, relentless ball breaking that characterized our friendship.  What difference did it make to me that little bitch was hard-timing it after a measly 4 hours in the tank.  After he got out I was right back on him too.  So buddy, tell me, you still playing tight end?  Or did Bubba move you to wide receiver?

CONFESSION

I didn't go straight to the Jail.  I took his 10k down to the casino and played Pai Gow at 1k a hand x 3 hands.  At one point I was down 9k.  With my balls shriveled to tic-tacs and my asshole puckered to a decimal point, I limped over to BJ with the last 1k and went on a fucking miracle rush.  Over the course of about 90 minutes, I had lost and then gained back precisely 9k.  Cashed out even, drove to the jail, sprung the homie, and never said a fucking word.  Until now.

[close]

you're a fucken dork

Hey, thanks for noticing, man.  I appreciate the compliment.  Listen buddy, once your other nut drops and you've graduated Junior High, AND assuming you are able to develop an 8th grade vocabulary by then ( I worry about you, the way you write makes me think you might get held back a grade or 2 ) maybe we can figure out WHY you're such a dork and WHY you feel the need to project on me.  It will be okay son.
For now, just go back to flicking your wet noodle on pornhub and let the grown ups talk.  Okay Skippy?. 

[Pho King Hung Lo Mein]

Scratch that Doc.  I see you're actually 31.  You're problems are much worse than I suspected and I'm afraid I cant help you.  My apologies for OVER estimating you.  I wish you luck out there kid.  And if I may, offer a bit of advice that I'm certain you'll find beneficial.  The next time you're standing at a urinal (oh wait, you probably sit, right?), at any rate,  do NOT eat the big white mint.

[jimstolz]

One time I went on an OkCupid date with this fiiiiine guitar player chick. Then we ended up at a bar with her fiiiiiine friend. It was all pretty great and she told me to give her a call later that week so we could go out again.

I wanted to smash tho and ended up staying at the bar til after close playing pool with a super handsome 45ish year old black dude. He cooked me brisket and gave me a bunch of delicious scotch and fancy beers and whatever.  I fucked that dude til I got bored and peaced the fuck out.

Later that week I hooked up with the guitar lady and that was pretty nice too. Until she find out I smashed the dude from the bar. They knew each other loloololll

She was pretty homophobic for a sassy leftist hipster thot and got super pissed at me for being a hoe. I never saw her again. Wasn't interested in hooking up with the dude again so I washed my hands (and dick) of the whole affair.

[Dr-Feelgood]

One time I went on an OkCupid date with this fiiiiine guitar player chick. Then we ended up at a bar with her fiiiiiine friend. It was all pretty great and she told me to give her a call later that week so we could go out again.

I wanted to smash tho and ended up staying at the bar til after close playing pool with a super handsome 45ish year old black dude. He cooked me brisket and gave me a bunch of delicious scotch and fancy beers and whatever.  I fucked that dude til I got bored and peaced the fuck out.

Later that week I hooked up with the guitar lady and that was pretty nice too. Until she find out I smashed the dude from the bar. They knew each other loloololll

She was pretty homophobic for a sassy leftist hipster thot and got super pissed at me for being a hoe. I never saw her again. Wasn't interested in hooking up with the dude again so I washed my hands (and dick) of the whole affair.

You are 100% a virgin

[Dr-Feelgood]

Scratch that Doc.  I see you're actually 31.  You're problems are much worse than I suspected and I'm afraid I cant help you.  My apologies for OVER estimating you.  I wish you luck out there kid.  And if I may, offer a bit of advice that I'm certain you'll find beneficial.  The next time you're standing at a urinal (oh wait, you probably sit, right?), at any rate,  do NOT eat the big white mint.

i dont know if you think thats funny but its not, you are a dork, settle down old man, go throw a chick off a balcony or blow 10 grand gambling, whatever it is you do pho king kong