real confessions

[Wood Pusher]

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Confession: I went through my girlfriend's cell phone, in hope of finding some erotic pics of her. But, I had no luck. I feel like a scumbag for doing that.

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I was sleeping at my older cousin's house one time and I took his cellphone while he was sleeping, found some nude photos of him and jerked off to it.

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hahah

[angryfacedman]

Im actually not that angryfaced.

[Ted Dibiase]

In the shower when I turn off all the lights to jack off it goes pitch black and i can't see anything and i think im blind until i pull the curtain over so i can see the crack of light under the door. no matter how many times i do it i still fall for it every time.

damn dude if i had a roommate who turned off the light while the shower is running i know automatically what they were doing and be pissed...then again it is better than them doing it in your room or something

[Bipsmound]

In the shower when I turn off all the lights to jack off it goes pitch black and i can't see anything and i think im blind until i pull the curtain over so i can see the crack of light under the door. no matter how many times i do it i still fall for it every time.

That's some lil' goblin shit right there.  In your dark damp cave underneath the waterfall where no one knows and no one can see (not even yourself)?  When your mom asks you why the fuck you're showering in the dark, do you hiss back at her "I'm going to my dark placccccceee"?

[TRAFFIC!]

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In the shower when I turn off all the lights to jack off it goes pitch black and i can't see anything and i think im blind until i pull the curtain over so i can see the crack of light under the door. no matter how many times i do it i still fall for it every time.

[close]

That's some lil' goblin shit right there.  In your dark damp cave underneath the waterfall where no one knows and no one can see (not even yourself)?  When your mom asks you why the fuck you're showering in the dark, do you hiss back at her "I'm going to my dark placccccceee"?

Hahahahahaha, holy fuck.  I almost spit pop everywhere reading that.  I can't wait to read your short story even more now.

[skate_bored]

When your mom asks you why the fuck you're showering in the dark, do you hiss back at her "I'm going to my dark placccccceee"?

hahaha

[lakai!]

Ted is pretty funny.

[biggums mcgee]

^^you should just stop while you're ahead with spamming this place up.

look at the past two pages (a month's time) of this thread. 1/2 the posts are from the same one or two people. I think its time to get off your ass, buddy

[thats a mark]

idk

[skate_bored]

went to vegas for a few days on a family trip with my mom and brother. after many free drinks and spending all the money i set aside for the trip(way too much already) i told them i was sick and was going to bed early, but i really went to the atm and withdrew another $200 which i blew on roulette. i guess this is how most peoples trip to vegas goes?

[anblue]

went to vegas for a few days on a family trip with my mom and brother. after many free drinks and spending all the money i set aside for the trip(way too much already) i told them i was sick and was going to bed early, but i really went to the atm and withdrew another $200 which i blew on roulette. i guess this is how most peoples trip to vegas goes?

well thats better than taking your families money, i drove home sorta drunk tonight and a little stoned i have work tomorrow and i dont wanna go, im just kinda like fuck everything right now, whens summer

[Pelican]

i can't get a girl to like me for longer than 2 weeks

and it devastates me every time

and now my first year of college is over and i've just alienated everyone and taken shitty classes

so i paid a shitload of money to be miserable and lonely

[anblue]

i can't get a girl to like me for longer than 2 weeks

and it devastates me every time

and now my first year of college is over and i've just alienated everyone and taken shitty classes

so i paid a shitload of money to be miserable and lonely

dude youll bounce back, its almost like these things work in cycles eventually youll hit your stride and be fine again

[Vegetable Lasagna]

Just pay a shitload more money and join a frat for instant 'friends' and girls.

[Pelican]

Just pay a shitload more money and join a frat for instant 'friends' and girls.

i seriously almost did this because some of the dudes were actually really cool and skated, but most of them hated me and kicked me out.

i know i'll bounce back, i'm not even really bummed because i never got too close to this girl, it's just so fucking demoralizing being perpetually rejected.

[CigaretteBeer]

When I die I'd like there to be finger foods and champagne at my funeral. I want my body parts stuffed at a taxidermist, placed in fancy jars, then everyone who attends my funeral will enter a raffle to see which part they will take home.

[MexicanSpaniard]

When I die I'd like there to be finger foods and champagne at my funeral. I want my body parts stuffed at a taxidermist, placed in fancy jars, then everyone who attends my funeral will enter a raffle to see which part they will take home.

Do you have a soundtrack you'd force them to listen to from beyond the grave as well?

[nocomply]

When I die I'd like there to be finger foods and champagne at my funeral. I want my body parts stuffed at a taxidermist, placed in fancy jars, then everyone who attends my funeral will enter a raffle to see which part they will take home.

before my dad died he told me he wanted a spittoon placed next to his coffin and he wanted people to walk up and spit in it and then point and laugh at him while he lied there dead in his coffin. I think he was joking... I didn't do it. It would have been pretty hilarious in retrospect, but I couldn't deal with it at the time.

[CigaretteBeer]

When I'm in the shower I like to take my ball sack and make it into a tarp to collect some falling water. When it fills up I enjoy dropping the water out of my sack and listening to it hit the shower floor.

[starvingrobot]

When I'm in the shower I like to take my ball sack and make it into a tarp to collect some falling water. When it fills up I enjoy dropping the water out of my sack and listening to it hit the shower floor.

Amazing.

[frisco]

i jerked off to naked pictures of my ex girlfriend, and i hate her

[busey]

i jerked off to naked pictures of my ex girlfriend, and i hate her

i didn't know you hated me.

[sparksandblood]

i jerked off to naked pictures of my ex girlfriend, and i hate her

ive heard of a hatefuck, but a hatejerk? thats uncharted territory, your a pioneer

[Gest]

i jerked off to naked pictures of my ex girlfriend, and i hate her

[skate_bored]

i jerked off to naked pictures of my ex girlfriend, and i hate her

count me in.

[CeeyMar]

I can't get off to pictures.

[longballlarry]

i think i speak for everyone when i say post the pics.

[drunk]

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When I'm in the shower I like to take my ball sack and make it into a tarp to collect some falling water. When it fills up I enjoy dropping the water out of my sack and listening to it hit the shower floor.

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Amazing.

[skate_bored]

when i was 17 i dated a girl til i was 20 and still kind of see her sometimes and its like nothings changed...but she has had a boyfriend for the past year. the whole thing fell apart because of me in the first place, i fucked it up. its been 2 years and im pretty stuck on her, and theres not much of a chance i can get her back, and to be honest, it wouldnt end up working anyways probably, just because of how important her religion is to her and my lack of religion. basically i cant get over the fucking nostalgia of when we dated and i will try to see her monthly just to try and get that feeling again. in the meantime i was trying to not fuck a bunch of girls in hopes of getting back together and not having to explain that while im the only person shes ever been with, ive fucked a bunch of other girls. holy fuck i sound like a bitch. anyways, im pretty much coming to the reality that it isnt going to happen and i keep getting drunk and taking home slutty girls from bars and this shit is no fun when you are sitting alone at home the next night. i dont think ill ever really like anybody the same way, and these sluts are only filling the void for a few hours. and half of them are cheating on their boyfriends with me, which makes me even more skeptical of meeting and trusting another girl. god damn, sorry i just typed that.

[Mackattack]

^the trust thing is big

Ive been the "other guy" that they cheated with at different times in my life, and it seemed so easy for them to do that to their boyfriends. It certainly does make it harder to trust a girl you want to be committed to...