real confessions

[few123456789]

Expand Quote

I felt talking to my ex was restricting my life. I have no idea what will happen between us.

[close]

i know how that feels. i talked in great lengths on this thread about how fucked i was when i got dumped about 8months ago. we maintained a bit of contact for some time but now it's almost been half a year that i've heard nothing from her, all i know is she was dating a new guy back then and that's where i pulled the plug, blacklisted her on my phone and everything. i still have a hard time letting go. she was my best friend and i still have troubles handling shit without her.

i've met other women in the meantime but i have a hard time connecting with them or even act sympathetic. so i stopped and now i just wait until it goes away. been thinking a lot about catching up with her lately, but all my/her friends(she lives three hours away but we still have a somewhat shared circle of friends) say i shouldn't. she will definetely be in town through most of the summer and i have panic attacks thinking about meeting her for the first time since the break up.

it also sucks because i'm really reluctant now to invest any emotion into a new relationship. it all seems like it doesn't matter anyway. i can't even bring myself to fuck the pain away, although there are several girls asking me all the time to hit a bar with them or whatnot. it would be so easy but it seems to me that when i'm realizing i'm actually having a great time at something, i'm bummed at the same time that i can't share it with her. i know it's stupid, i just can't help myself. i guess she was "that" girl for me. breakups were usually no big deal for me, but this one's still a tough one.

How old are you?

[Frank]

i'm 27 and i had my fair share of relationships, the longest one going for more than three years and i also shared a place with one of my ex-gfs. it's new to me because i'm still close to pretty much all my exs, i never had a problem with them having a new partner or something. i can't even tell what makes this one so different

[few123456789]

i'm 27 and i had my fair share of relationships, the longest one going for more than three years and i also shared a place with one of my ex-gfs. it's new to me because i'm still close to pretty much all my exs, i never had a problem with them having a new partner or something. i can't even tell what makes this one so different

I feel for you bro.  You're a few years older than I expected.

Don't date for a while.  There is nothing wrong with that.  You don't have to hook up either--in fact I encourage some solitary period.  Be confident that you don't need a woman.

Make friends with a girl you think is hot and that you like on a personal level.  The most important thing is that you are friends.  Once that is done (give it at least, at least a year), take her down.  Just go for it.  That should be easy.  Then she's yours.

Probably the best thing that ever happened to you was this ex leaving you. 

[Frank]

thanks man, that's pretty much what i'm going for now. just trying to be happy for myself.

[few123456789]

thanks man, that's pretty much what i'm going for now. just trying to be happy for myself.

Great.  You're money and you don't even know it. 

Take a long break though.  It's good for you.  When you realize you don't need any of them, and you honestly don't want to deal with any of them or their bullshit (comes with the territory), you find one.

[Laban Fetus]

I'm 20 years old and still living at home. I know this is an increasingly normal thing in America but it's literally driving me fucking crazy. Haven't been able to find a job for two years post high-school, didn't finish high-school to begin with, don't have a G.E.D., haven't gone to college among other things. My failure to do these things doesn't have anything to do with smarts (god knows how many times people have said i'm "bright and have potential") but more so with being a non-linear thinker who really can't focus on anything in the real world what-so-ever. Excuses? sure... but it's my reality. Being raised by two artist/hippie parents who didn't show much focus on me being a better student maybe added in to being a "head in the clouds" kind of guy.. who knows. Just coming to terms with being a lost cause here

[Will Easley]

I'm 20 years old and still living at home. I know this is an increasingly normal thing in America but it's literally driving me fucking crazy. Haven't been able to find a job for two years post high-school, didn't finish high-school to begin with, don't have a G.E.D., haven't gone to college among other things. My failure to do these things doesn't have anything to do with smarts (god knows how many times people have said i'm "bright and have potential") but more so with being a non-linear thinker who really can't focus on anything in the real world what-so-ever. Excuses? sure... but it's my reality. Being raised by two artist/hippie parents who didn't show much focus on me being a better student maybe added in to being a "head in the clouds" kind of guy.. who knows. Just coming to terms with being a lost cause here

its all about focus man. shit only gets older & more frustrating with time. eventually youll just say fuck it & start working towards something. find what it is you really wanna do. not just ona surface level, but what things in life actually bring you deep fulfillment & satisfaction? some people are driven to inspire people, others want to master a craft or learn about something...just find that niche & work from there. just start off small making small improvements here & there, but the main point to consistently take those baby steps every day & eventually it snowballs into something more fulfilling. you're fueled by the small successes that make you want to succeed more, and so on.

school shit aside, it sounds like you just arent totally sure with what you want to do with your life so you sit there just being stagnant. I'd advise reading Robert Greene's book Mastery. its about learning to take the necessary steps to become a "master" at anything over a long term apprenticeship. The book as a whole is great but at the beginning it speaks on the whole "finding what it is that you truly want to do" thing in depth & that is where i think you can apply some of that knowledge to better your life & feel good about yourself. nobodys a lost cause man i done seen the worst of niggas learn from their mistakes & go on to do good for themselves, and I believe that the experiences we have are what makes us so while you may be in somewhat of a bad period right now, hopefully in the future you'll find success & happiness from the lessons you've learned during that period. good luck fam

[Laban Fetus]

Expand Quote

I'm 20 years old and still living at home. I know this is an increasingly normal thing in America but it's literally driving me fucking crazy. Haven't been able to find a job for two years post high-school, didn't finish high-school to begin with, don't have a G.E.D., haven't gone to college among other things. My failure to do these things doesn't have anything to do with smarts (god knows how many times people have said i'm "bright and have potential") but more so with being a non-linear thinker who really can't focus on anything in the real world what-so-ever. Excuses? sure... but it's my reality. Being raised by two artist/hippie parents who didn't show much focus on me being a better student maybe added in to being a "head in the clouds" kind of guy.. who knows. Just coming to terms with being a lost cause here

[close]

its all about focus man. shit only gets older & more frustrating with time. eventually youll just say fuck it & start working towards something. find what it is you really wanna do. not just ona surface level, but what things in life actually bring you deep fulfillment & satisfaction? some people are driven to inspire people, others want to master a craft or learn about something...just find that niche & work from there. just start off small making small improvements here & there, but the main point to consistently take those baby steps every day & eventually it snowballs into something more fulfilling. you're fueled by the small successes that make you want to succeed more, and so on.

school shit aside, it sounds like you just arent totally sure with what you want to do with your life so you sit there just being stagnant. I'd advise reading Robert Greene's book Mastery. its about learning to take the necessary steps to become a "master" at anything over a long term apprenticeship. The book as a whole is great but at the beginning it speaks on the whole "finding what it is that you truly want to do" thing in depth & that is where i think you can apply some of that knowledge to better your life & feel good about yourself. nobodys a lost cause man i done seen the worst of niggas learn from their mistakes & go on to do good for themselves, and I believe that the experiences we have are what makes us so while you may be in somewhat of a bad period right now, hopefully in the future you'll find success & happiness from the lessons you've learned during that period. good luck fam

I think I've given you shit on here before but thanks anyway. We actually have the same aspiration which is music. That's what is fulfilling to me and the ultimate goal but i'm just going through an uninspired period right now. The main focus is just to move out right now

[ice nine]

is there a way to lock this thread to skatedood and other idiots? don't ruin someone elses life just because yours is a trainwreck

[L33Tg33k]

What's wrong with what he said, Icenine? For real.

[Will Easley]

is there a way to lock this thread to skatedood and other idiots? don't ruin someone elses life just because yours is a trainwreck

explain to me how i just "ruined his life" by offering sound advice? and my life is far from a trainwreck. It aint perfect but i liked where im headed & where my minds at. i may wild out in other parts of slap but at least i dont try to shit on people in thread mostly used to vent & get advice. grow up.

[Dontfearthereefer]

for as much shit people give the dood, when he posts in this thread there isnt much to hate on, its sound advice he gives, but like guru said it is often easier to give advice than it is to run ones own life. cool it ice

@homie im 21 years old and wish i could still live at home, the idea is definitely cooler than the reality

[LOU.502]

Was gonna do productive stuff today but somehow ended up shirtless in bed drinking vodka and eating corn on the cob watching old skate videos I've eaten three corn cobs. I'm not joking.

[Cadillac Ranch Dressing]

Gnar'd

[skate_bored]

Expand Quote

thanks man, that's pretty much what i'm going for now. just trying to be happy for myself.

[close]

Great.  You're money and you don't even know it. 

Take a long break though.  It's good for you.  When you realize you don't need any of them, and you honestly don't want to deal with any of them or their bullshit (comes with the territory), you find one.

after my last relationship ended i was like this and it was the best. just completely uninterested in dealing with a girl. then i met my current girlfriend and she changed my mind, basically because there isnt any "dealing with" her. shes rad. good luck dude! there definitely a compatible and awesome lady out there for you.

[L33Tg33k]

Your living the charmed life as far as I'm concerned, October. You have a girlfriend. I've never so much as held a girl's hand. I don't have any real friends and I've been drifting away from my associates whom I've had for the past 5 or 6 years. Before that I didn't have any friends at all. That is to say that I was alone all throughout my school years. At least I know more people now than I did in high school, though.

[Hate_Then_Skate]

Your living the charmed life as far as I'm concerned, October. You have a girlfriend. I've never so much as held a girl's hand. I don't have any real friends and I've been drifting away from my associates whom I've had for the past 5 or 6 years. Before that I didn't have any friends at all. That is to say that I was alone all throughout my school years. At least I know more people now than I did in high school, though.

But you have all of us on SLAP.  Honest to goodness internet friends that will listen and converse with you and never ask to borrow money.  You're killing it, we all are.

[paraquat]

I have not had someone to skate with since '09. It's sucks but I have embraced it and have come to enjoy solo skating. I grew up with a crew of seven or so dudes that were down to skate at almost anytime/any weather. Now I have to conjure my own motivation to have a dead of winter flatbar session. It's all good though. C'est la vie.

[Will Easley]

I have not had someone to skate with since '09. It's sucks but I have embraced it and have come to enjoy solo skating. I grew up with a crew of seven or so dudes that were down to skate at almost anytime/any weather. Now I have to conjure my own motivation to have a dead of winter flatbar session. It's all good though. C'est la vie.

shit do you have any parks around you? thats always been the easiest way for me to find & make new skateboarding friends. i dont mind solo skating when im working on tricks but when im about to do something heavy at a street spot i always gotta have at least one friend with me. i tend to feed off the groups energy. shit i couldnt even imagine skating without friends for years.

[69]

Expand Quote

I have not had someone to skate with since '09. It's sucks but I have embraced it and have come to enjoy solo skating. I grew up with a crew of seven or so dudes that were down to skate at almost anytime/any weather. Now I have to conjure my own motivation to have a dead of winter flatbar session. It's all good though. C'est la vie.

[close]

Has been my exact problem too. Pretty much no one to skate with since 2008. Every now and then my little brother will skate, but he's so retardedly into road biking its ridiculous. Sucks, because the dude is a natural on a board.

I skate a flatbar and box by myself 3-4 days a week. I go to a few spots, but dont stay long, because its not the same when you skate by yourself. Same with going to the skate park.

I have come to kinda embrace it, but it was so much more fun skating with all my friends back in the day. Use to have a good crew, but everyone pretty much quit or moved.

Mmmm interesting situations here, very interesting.

I would recommend socialising and fine tuning all those awkward mannerism you most defiently suffer from.

Maybe try taking an prescription anti aniexty pill.... probably Efexor-XR

These aren't too hard to get, just go to your doctor and tell him your sap story (crying would be a bonus)



THERE! Your problems are solved,

regards, sisxty nine

[paraquat]

There are parks in my area, but most are filled with 14-16 year olds. I will socialize with them (talk about tricks, etc), but no outside the park sessions. Not a lot of people skate past 18-20 in my area, and I am 29.

If I lived in a bigger city, I would probably not have this "problem".

Its all good though. I just skate for fun/learn some new tricks/be outside/not look cool/release some endorphins when I land something.

[69]

Yea, its more of the age group of skaters here.

Like I said before, ever since getting out of the military though, I have noticed that I am slightly awkward socially. And I definitely wasnt before. Just seems like I have a hard time connecting with people, and I can often be negative for no reason, which I'm sure drives people away. I saw an old friend in Walmart the other day that I havent seen in 8 years, and I just walked right by him. Stupid shit like that.

I'm just dumb.

Do you think you hate yourself (serious question)

[nino brown]

I'm 20 years old and still living at home. I know this is an increasingly normal thing in America but it's literally driving me fucking crazy. Haven't been able to find a job for two years post high-school, didn't finish high-school to begin with, don't have a G.E.D., haven't gone to college among other things. My failure to do these things doesn't have anything to do with smarts (god knows how many times people have said i'm "bright and have potential") but more so with being a non-linear thinker who really can't focus on anything in the real world what-so-ever. Excuses? sure... but it's my reality. Being raised by two artist/hippie parents who didn't show much focus on me being a better student maybe added in to being a "head in the clouds" kind of guy.. who knows. Just coming to terms with being a lost cause here

i feel you bruh, im going threw the same shit. finding a decent paying job is damn near impossible. dont let it get you down dog just try to make some moves.

[Filip]

Ive been without a job in the past for almost two years straight, it sucks. Luckily, Ive been working a decent paying job for the last 4 months now, and its seriously the best. Not just for the money, but I feel like im finally doing something in my life. Best of luck and gnars for both of you.

[Laban Fetus]

Ive been without a job in the past for almost two years straight, it sucks. Luckily, Ive been working a decent paying job for the last 4 months now, and its seriously the best. Not just for the money, but I feel like im finally doing something in my life. Best of luck and gnars for both of you.

Thanks. I'm actually trying way harder to get one now which just mean a lot of Craigslist browsing and an open mind. I'll never get anywhere just moping and waiting for something to fall into my hands.  Psyched for all of your future endeavors

[jack burton]

This has been one of the most stressful years of my life. I can deal with most of the stress but my girlfriends mental health has been pretty heavy lately. I could go into detail but ill spare everyone since I'm drunk.

[Beeda Weeda]

stay up brother, life is a lesson.

[Dirtymac]

Expand Quote

I have not had someone to skate with since '09. It's sucks but I have embraced it and have come to enjoy solo skating. I grew up with a crew of seven or so dudes that were down to skate at almost anytime/any weather. Now I have to conjure my own motivation to have a dead of winter flatbar session. It's all good though. C'est la vie.

[close]

Has been my exact problem too. Pretty much no one to skate with since 2008. Every now and then my little brother will skate, but he's so retardedly into road biking its ridiculous. Sucks, because the dude is a natural on a board.

I skate a flatbar and box by myself 3-4 days a week. I go to a few spots, but dont stay long, because its not the same when you skate by yourself. Same with going to the skate park.

I have come to kinda embrace it, but it was so much more fun skating with all my friends back in the day. Use to have a good crew, but everyone pretty much quit or moved.

Build a ramp/spot. You'll have more friends than you want...

[jack burton]

stay up brother, life is a lesson.

But seriously thanks.

[Frank]

yo jack burton, been through a similar thing a few years back. i don't know if i can provide any helpful advice, but feel free to pm me or something.

stay up