real confessions

[L33Tg33k]

I accidentally sent a love confession to the girl I like. I was typing in the messager app about what I felt as a catharsis but never meant to send anything. I had done this a few times already and it helped somewhat. Stupid, I know. I never said I loved her or anything crazy like that, but I did say a bunch of stupid shit about how much I respect her and how attractive I found her. When I accidentally hit that send button the instant regret was so overwhelming that I couldn't look at her reply for a day. When I finally took a peak I only read part of the first sentence, just enough to know that I was being rejected, and I couldn't read the rest of the paragraph. Shit, I knew I would be rejected if I took a shot at her but it hit way different when it actually happened. This happened about a year ago now, so I guess I'm as okay about it as I ever will be. I still really like the girl and fantasize about her reconsidering. Healthy as fuck. I try to tell myself that I'm only so attracted to her because she's one of very few women that I know and she's nice to me. It's probably not true though. The reality may be that we just have so much in common and I really appreciate her personality. Oh well, lunch break is over. Time to go back to work. Talk all the shit you want.

[Freelancevagrant]

I accidentally sent a love confession to the girl I like. I was typing in the messager app about what I felt as a catharsis but never meant to send anything. I had done this a few times already and it helped somewhat. Stupid, I know. I never said I loved her or anything crazy like that, but if I did say a bunch of stupid shit about how much I respect her and how attractive I found her. When I accidentally hit that send button the instant regret was so overwhelming that I couldn't look at her reply for a day. When I finally took a peak I only read part of the first sentence, just enough to know that I was being rejected, and I couldn't read the rest of the paragraph. Shit, I knew I would be rejected if I took a shot at her but it hit way different when it actually happened. This happened about a year ago now, so I guess I'm as okay about it as I ever will be. I still really like the girl and fantasize about her reconsidering. Healthy as fuck. I try to tell myself that I'm only so attracted to her because she's one of very few women that I know and she's nice to me. It's probably not true though. The reality may be that we just have so much in common and I really appreciate her personality. Oh well, lunch break is over. Time to go back to work. Talk all the shit you want.

Dude, I’m fucking rooting for you 1000% How old are you, if you don’t mind me asking. 

I know it’s difficult to get to know people during a pandemic, but have you tried any dating sites, if so which ones?

[Grind King Rims]

Even if you think it was a mistake to send that, I really think it's better to have taken the chance and have been rejected than to be secretly fantasizing about what the relationship could be. You would have been doing yourself a disservice to not be open about how you felt. Whether you realize it or not, that shit can be a burden. You'll feel better pal, trust. <3

[Sila]

Yeah, it sucks that you sent the message accidentally but in the long run it might do you a world of good. I'd put my head through a window if that happened to me I'd say you're doing pretty well pal. Most women (and people in general) appreciate that kind of brutal honesty so hopefully something works out even if you just remain buddies. I've lost good friends because we got into relationships that didn't work out and wish we just stayed hanging out casually because now these people are completely out of my life. Keep your head up brother.

[matty_c]

Fuck it, you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take

[L33Tg33k]

Thanks guys.

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I accidentally sent a love confession to the girl I like. I was typing in the messager app about what I felt as a catharsis but never meant to send anything. I had done this a few times already and it helped somewhat. Stupid, I know. I never said I loved her or anything crazy like that, but if I did say a bunch of stupid shit about how much I respect her and how attractive I found her. When I accidentally hit that send button the instant regret was so overwhelming that I couldn't look at her reply for a day. When I finally took a peak I only read part of the first sentence, just enough to know that I was being rejected, and I couldn't read the rest of the paragraph. Shit, I knew I would be rejected if I took a shot at her but it hit way different when it actually happened. This happened about a year ago now, so I guess I'm as okay about it as I ever will be. I still really like the girl and fantasize about her reconsidering. Healthy as fuck. I try to tell myself that I'm only so attracted to her because she's one of very few women that I know and she's nice to me. It's probably not true though. The reality may be that we just have so much in common and I really appreciate her personality. Oh well, lunch break is over. Time to go back to work. Talk all the shit you want.

[close]

Dude, I’m fucking rooting for you 1000% How old are you, if you don’t mind me asking. 

I know it’s difficult to get to know people during a pandemic, but have you tried any dating sites, if so which ones?

32. I've got Tinder, Bumble, PoF, OKC, Hinge, and Coffee Meets Bagel. They all blow. I've gotten a couple matches on Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge, but they all went nowhere. My ratio of matches to my number of swipes is abysmal especially considering that I paid for premium versions of a couple of these apps. I've had people look over my profiles and they say they're strong but I still get almost no play. Anyway, I suppose I don't know how to talk to women. Or maybe I don't know how to talk to strangers is more apt.

[Sila]

At least you're trying. I was in long term relationships for years and now i'm out but don't even have the confidence to make a profile. Keep chipping away I feel like you've got this.

[Grind King Rims]

Ask questions, but don't make it feel like an interview.
Offer up info about yourself if it's interesting or funny. If it's not interesting, talk about something else
Be funny.

[Fhk]

Thanks guys.

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I accidentally sent a love confession to the girl I like. I was typing in the messager app about what I felt as a catharsis but never meant to send anything. I had done this a few times already and it helped somewhat. Stupid, I know. I never said I loved her or anything crazy like that, but if I did say a bunch of stupid shit about how much I respect her and how attractive I found her. When I accidentally hit that send button the instant regret was so overwhelming that I couldn't look at her reply for a day. When I finally took a peak I only read part of the first sentence, just enough to know that I was being rejected, and I couldn't read the rest of the paragraph. Shit, I knew I would be rejected if I took a shot at her but it hit way different when it actually happened. This happened about a year ago now, so I guess I'm as okay about it as I ever will be. I still really like the girl and fantasize about her reconsidering. Healthy as fuck. I try to tell myself that I'm only so attracted to her because she's one of very few women that I know and she's nice to me. It's probably not true though. The reality may be that we just have so much in common and I really appreciate her personality. Oh well, lunch break is over. Time to go back to work. Talk all the shit you want.

[close]

Dude, I’m fucking rooting for you 1000% How old are you, if you don’t mind me asking. 

I know it’s difficult to get to know people during a pandemic, but have you tried any dating sites, if so which ones?

[close]

32. I've got Tinder, Bumble, PoF, OKC, Hinge, and Coffee Meets Bagel. They all blow. I've gotten a couple matches on Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge, but they all went nowhere. My ratio of matches to my number of swipes is abysmal especially considering that I paid for premium versions of a couple of these apps. I've had people look over my profiles and they say they're strong but I still get almost no play. Anyway, I suppose I don't know how to talk to women. Or maybe I don't know how to talk to strangers is more apt.

I have devoted way to much time observing and analyzing the failed relationships I have had, and also the ones around me. Take the pressure off yourself and just let things be whatever the fuck they will be. Don't ever be hard on yourself when it comes to "it could of been's". For every loving couple nowadays, I see way more relationships that end terribly or even more common, two people that just linger on through life coexisting without ever fulfilling the dreams they as an individual once had, because they "settled". I hope you find what you deserve homeboy.

[Freelancevagrant]

Ask questions, but don't make it feel like an interview.
Offer up info about yourself if it's interesting or funny. If it's not interesting, talk about something else
Be funny.

That’s such sound advice.

A huge thing also is just being relatable, if you ask questions and their answers have something similar to your experiences bring that up. And be interested!

You got this shit dude, we’re all rooting for you

[L33Tg33k]

I'm not funny. I know it’s the number one thing women say they're interested in, but I'm just not.

[Freelancevagrant]

I'm not funny. I know it’s the number one thing women say they're interested in, but I'm just not.

You don’t have to be a comedian, but you’re a smart enough dude to be able to pull of some dead pan humor.

Just don’t do impressions, and don’t try to be offensive ya know? Also what are your standards like? When you’re on tinder and shit are you swiping right on everything and sorting out later? Cast a wide net my dude.

[Grind King Rims]

I'm not funny. I know it’s the number one thing women say they're interested in, but I'm just not.

You don't have to be funny, you just have to have a sense of humor. There's an important distinction.

You can just point out funny stuff or tell your friends stories (has the added benefit of implying that other people think you're good company) and talk about all kinds of stuff you find funny, without even being funny yourself. I've gotten laid on the back of memes alone. If I ever meet Taylor Nawrocki, I owe him a beer.

Billy Connolly once spoke about using other people's stories/anecdotes (not comedians) in his act, and he got away with it every time because the crowd doesn't care if it happened to you, they care about what happened. "This crazy thing happened to my friend Larry..."

we’re all rooting for you

[straight]

does anyone here deal with depersonalization .. it hits me a couple times a day and sends me into an anxiety attack .. maybe you’re familiar with it when you get too stoned and green out but it hits me when im sober .. i feel like im going crazy sometimes and i have mild schizophrenia

[L33Tg33k]

does anyone here deal with depersonalization .. it hits me a couple times a day and sends me into an anxiety attack .. maybe you’re familiar with it when you get too stoned and green out but it hits me when im sober .. i feel like im going crazy sometimes and i have mild schizophrenia

Elaborate

[GardenSkater77]

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does anyone here deal with depersonalization .. it hits me a couple times a day and sends me into an anxiety attack .. maybe you’re familiar with it when you get too stoned and green out but it hits me when im sober .. i feel like im going crazy sometimes and i have mild schizophrenia

[close]

Elaborate

I just looked up the term and it describes the way I have always felt. In school I used to sit in the back of the class and feel like I was watching my classmates taking part in something I was not actually talking part in. When the teacher called on me I was almost shocked that he/she could see me.

I was never big on parties or going to the bar and have always felt like a bit of a spectator in most of my life.

Having kids definitely helps but I feel like I am less emotionally engaged in the world than my fellow man.

If you just started feeling this way I could see how it feels scary but it could pass. I am a used to feeling this way and try to connect with people as best I can on the daily.

If you are worse than what I described you may want to meet with a therapist. If you are completely outside yourself seek help.

[beatifk]

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does anyone here deal with depersonalization .. it hits me a couple times a day and sends me into an anxiety attack .. maybe you’re familiar with it when you get too stoned and green out but it hits me when im sober .. i feel like im going crazy sometimes and i have mild schizophrenia

[close]

Elaborate

[close]

I just looked up the term and it describes the way I have always felt. In school I used to sit in the back of the class and feel like I was watching my classmates taking part in something I was not actually talking part in. When the teacher called on me I was almost shocked that he/she could see me.

I was never big on parties or going to the bar and have always felt like a bit of a spectator in most of my life.

Having kids definitely helps but I feel like I am less emotionally engaged in the world than my fellow man.

If you just started feeling this way I could see how it feels scary but it could pass. I am a used to feeling this way and try to connect with people as best I can on the daily.

If you are worse than what I described you may want to meet with a therapist. If you are completely outside yourself seek help.

I feel like I have this as well, but not professionally diagnosed, so who knows.

I currently hate my job. And I hate going every day. So as soon as I get home every day I forget everything that happened during the day. It's kinda like I had a dream. You know how when you dream, you sometimes can remember some stuff, but not always and almost never as like one cohesive story? Every day I go to work is like that. So to me, it's like I'm remembering something I'm not a part of or at the very most, something I dreamed. It's not a very good feeling at all.

I definitely need to see a therapist, but more importantly, I need to find a new job. At this moment it's proving to be quite difficult, but I'm keeping hope for the near future to feel better.

[straight]

ya i think it’s different for me .. have you ever had an out of body experience on drugs ? thats what it feels like .. and ive has it since my teens .. it hits me and it’s familiar so i know how to get out of it

[Dr-Feelgood]

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does anyone here deal with depersonalization .. it hits me a couple times a day and sends me into an anxiety attack .. maybe you’re familiar with it when you get too stoned and green out but it hits me when im sober .. i feel like im going crazy sometimes and i have mild schizophrenia

[close]

Elaborate

[close]

I just looked up the term and it describes the way I have always felt. In school I used to sit in the back of the class and feel like I was watching my classmates taking part in something I was not actually talking part in. When the teacher called on me I was almost shocked that he/she could see me.

I was never big on parties or going to the bar and have always felt like a bit of a spectator in most of my life.

Having kids definitely helps but I feel like I am less emotionally engaged in the world than my fellow man.

If you just started feeling this way I could see how it feels scary but it could pass. I am a used to feeling this way and try to connect with people as best I can on the daily.

If you are worse than what I described you may want to meet with a therapist. If you are completely outside yourself seek help.

[close]

I feel like I have this as well, but not professionally diagnosed, so who knows.

I currently hate my job. And I hate going every day. So as soon as I get home every day I forget everything that happened during the day. It's kinda like I had a dream. You know how when you dream, you sometimes can remember some stuff, but not always and almost never as like one cohesive story? Every day I go to work is like that. So to me, it's like I'm remembering something I'm not a part of or at the very most, something I dreamed. It's not a very good feeling at all.

I definitely need to see a therapist, but more importantly, I need to find a new job. At this moment it's proving to be quite difficult, but I'm keeping hope for the near future to feel better.

I feel this, i kept doing this job hating every morning, every minute but then id get home and be so relieved to be home that i would almost forget how much i hate the job until the next day. This was reoccuring for 4 months and i finally quit, never been happier. Good luck getting happy, i sincerely hope you work things out bro

[beatifk]

ya i think it’s different for me .. have you ever had an out of body experience on drugs ? thats what it feels like .. and ive has it since my teens .. it hits me and it’s familiar so i know how to get out of it

Yes, I've had that. I had a dissociative drug phase in my early 20s. I guess it's just a matter of timing. When it's happening and when I'm remembering it. But, yeah, maybe different feelings.

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does anyone here deal with depersonalization .. it hits me a couple times a day and sends me into an anxiety attack .. maybe you’re familiar with it when you get too stoned and green out but it hits me when im sober .. i feel like im going crazy sometimes and i have mild schizophrenia

[close]

Elaborate

[close]

I just looked up the term and it describes the way I have always felt. In school I used to sit in the back of the class and feel like I was watching my classmates taking part in something I was not actually talking part in. When the teacher called on me I was almost shocked that he/she could see me.

I was never big on parties or going to the bar and have always felt like a bit of a spectator in most of my life.

Having kids definitely helps but I feel like I am less emotionally engaged in the world than my fellow man.

If you just started feeling this way I could see how it feels scary but it could pass. I am a used to feeling this way and try to connect with people as best I can on the daily.

If you are worse than what I described you may want to meet with a therapist. If you are completely outside yourself seek help.

[close]

I feel like I have this as well, but not professionally diagnosed, so who knows.

I currently hate my job. And I hate going every day. So as soon as I get home every day I forget everything that happened during the day. It's kinda like I had a dream. You know how when you dream, you sometimes can remember some stuff, but not always and almost never as like one cohesive story? Every day I go to work is like that. So to me, it's like I'm remembering something I'm not a part of or at the very most, something I dreamed. It's not a very good feeling at all.

I definitely need to see a therapist, but more importantly, I need to find a new job. At this moment it's proving to be quite difficult, but I'm keeping hope for the near future to feel better.

[close]

I feel this, i kept doing this job hating every morning, every minute but then id get home and be so relieved to be home that i would almost forget how much i hate the job until the next day. This was reoccuring for 4 months and i finally quit, never been happier. Good luck getting happy, i sincerely hope you work things out bro

Thanks! I'm looking to the future for sure and a lot of other things are going good for me so I can take comfort in that too.

EDIT: 10000th post in this thread. My 420th post. Praise Jah!

[doublesteveburger]

I can relate to disassociation. It’s become increasingly intrusive to my psyche the last couple years causing crippling anxiety and bouts of depression. Usually leads to self-medicating and fickle/impulsive tendencies.


Depression is no fun.

[blurst_of_times]

I can relate to disassociation. It’s become increasingly intrusive to my psyche the last couple years causing crippling anxiety and bouts of depression. Usually leads to self-medicating and fickle/impulsive tendencies.


Depression is no fun.

I hope you are well, @doublesteveburger

[Phil Leotardo]

Definitely feel the dissociation posts. Had to quit smoking weed recently.  Every time I would toke I'd have massive panic attacks/anxiety to the point where I'd just zone out like a zombie in my own thoughts. Not pleasant at all. Been two months now and haven't had it happen since. Was a daily smoker so maybe that had something to do with it idk

[lazer69]

I think Im a highly functioning autist. It makes life a bit frustrating, disappointing, and difficult.

Oh and I dont care about autism jokes, or normies calling others or each other, or myself that..

[Dr-Feelgood]

Lately ive been coming to terms with letting friendships end or not putting so much stock into maintaining friendships with people that i shouldnt.....I use to think close friends were all you had and regardless of how different you might be you need to really maintain it but it shouldnt be THAT much work, if people are just negative toxic assholes i dont need to try and change that or be a part of it. I can have no beef and be civil but not put anymore of my time or energy into the relationship........i think that make sense, im just word vomiting whats on my mind right now.

[Dr-Feelgood]

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Lately ive been coming to terms with letting friendships end or not putting so much stock into maintaining friendships with people that i shouldnt.....I use to think close friends were all you had and regardless of how different you might be you need to really maintain it but it shouldnt be THAT much work, if people are just negative toxic assholes i dont need to try and change that or be a part of it. I can have no beef and be civil but not put anymore of my time or energy into the relationship........i think that make sense, im just word vomiting whats on my mind right now.

[close]

hey good for you on that tip. I've had to cut some out, one in particular was very hard. Dude was one of my longest friends who I'd been through a lot with and a person the called my brother. For years, like more than a decade, I excused his constant lies about things that don't matter (women, money, skating, other "cool" experiences), patronizing attitude towards others and increasingly myself, shit talking the homies when they weren't around, and inconsiderate/selfish nature as him just being his oblivious self that meant no harm. Mind you, we're in the mid30s now, but for a while, when dude was getting rough I'd say "Bro, why are you acting like your old man? That dudes a dick and you sound just like him" and it worked for a minute. About a year ago some betrayal sort of shit went down that really left me in the lurch and I decided that I was done. I've realized that for a few years anyways, that while we had a good time kicking it, I was always worried about getting shit talked or something by this dude and kind of dreaded hanging out with him and was concerned about it afterwards. Anyways, it was really similar to a toxic/abusive relationship in a lot of ways with all the gaslighting and tension. Although I've definitely removed myself from the shared scene spaces and miss some other people, I'm pretty stoked to no longer be associating with him.

Damn dude, sounds super similar. The guy im talking about pretty much hated his father but is exactly like him....if i told him that im sure he would flip out. Hes always been a little unhinged and ive known him my whole life so ive kinda just let it be but the past few years i hit a point where when we were hanging out or going for a few drinks id always worry about at what point of the evening is this guy gonna get set off by something i said he dosent agree with and get all high and mighty and agressive about it....in the end it just wasnt fun anymore, we had a mini blow up a few months ago and i tried to air out some honest opinions but of course that didnt go well....so i took a step back, havent shittalked, havent caused beef just decided i dont want to be a part of that anymore.

[nivek navillus 25]

in kindergarten i would sit in the back of the class and think 'is this real?' like it seemed to be too surreal or absurd to be real but if it wasn't, who's dream was it? something had to be real. usedta trip me out a bit but i'd go home and ask my mom and she'd say it was real. just seemed so removed from my life to that point.
i usedta watch kids before school kick a dodgeball onto the roof and it would bounce down, they'd kick it back up. i enjoyed watching them play but if the ball ever came towards me i'd run off. i was an observer like it was a movie. i didn't want the attention. still don't although i have moments where i guess i grab the proverbial mic and am funny.

[funeral_tuxedo]

I can relate to so much of what you guys are talking about in depersonalization.
When I was a kid I experienced some pretty horrorshow type traumas and became so dissociated as a survival mechanism that I couldn't really function without substances and even then I'd felt like I was barely a person. it hasn't been until recent years of therapy that I've begun unpacking that stuff gently.

@L33Tg33k I know this is unsolicited advice so feel free to tell me to fuck off, but in my experience as a person with heavy duty depression/anxiety I really had to work hard at putting myself out there and surviving rejection after rejection enough times to develop a baseline comfortability with romantic/sexual situations. Dating can be some next level psychological anguish and for years I needed to be fucked up to not have a panic attack just trying to decide if I should make a move to touch a girl's hand in a movie theater or nauseous self loathing imaging their disgust if I tried to kiss them even if we were on a date. And I'd always freeze and forget things and feel so blank and stupid.
Anyways, it was getting help with medical professionals that really pushed me into socializing and although I still struggle every day it's gotten so much better than it was. I've always thought you were really clever and genuine in your posts, so I'm willing to bet if you're comfortable on a date those qualities will show and humor will be a part of that too. If you ever want to PM about this stuff hit me up.

[matty_c]

I legit spent a dece chunk of my 20’s bumming around alternating between dole and Austudy and selling drugs and had a great time, always got wasted and stuff, always had cash to do whatevs
When I started apprenticeship cunts that I’d been friends and skated with for years started talking shit and calling me a greedy cunt and saying I was all about money. Like I’m even rich cunt

but I think it really was because I just started saying man you wanna sit at mine or go skating and you wanna drink half my carton and bum half my smokes or whatever well that will cost you this and if you’ve not got coin to chuck in then you can have a glass of water and dumpers from the ashtray.

At the time I was getting fucking destroyed as an apprentice, I mean it was deadset hard work and it made me think nah cunt I work hard for this coin it’s fucking mine mate

It was a different concept to me versus when it just lands in your hand from doing suss shit

I have this other group of friends guys I’ve known since primary and early high school, they all stopped skating in high school. Good blokes mostly tradies too but just like, solid people that I enjoy being around. But still proper loose units that love the sesh
Just able to back it up at work

I have a couple of mates that still skate and work different circle of friends and we meet up it’s good times but yeah just the amount of bitching went on from certain people when I started ‘doing well’ and I wanna say I was a fucking apprentice still at this stage. Doing well is subjective I only had a bit of coin cause I was doing cashies after work etc, literally working my arse of

Just the straight vitriol I copped from some cunts, found out about second hand kinda shocked me I mean nobody said shit to my face so maybe that’s on me, if someone can’t say something to your face why care right. I harbour some rage about this and it’s mostly cause I couldn’t even get no satisfaction, it’s like man you wanna talk shit come meet up...crickets

but just speaking generally here, there’s cunts that will just hate on absolutely anything. And you just can’t listen to them or even entertain their suggestions. Much less associate with them
They gonna fuck you up fam

People like that just want you to be a loser like them so they feel better about their situation

It’s rough but for everyone on here never be afraid or feel bad cutting out people that have no value. You can’t save em all and life’s fucking hard man can’t be wasting time on stupid shit you gotta do you

You’re only as smart as your dumbest mate
And also,

May the bridges you burn light your way

Dude that’s off 90210 luke perry said that shit, classic

[iKobrakai]

If you have two-three friends after 30, you're super lucky.