Author Topic: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session  (Read 13788 times)

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SHIREFLIP

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #30 on: September 06, 2019, 09:35:27 AM »
I worry I may unintentionally wind up at girlsí skate time of day.

Iím incredibly fragile, and Iím not sure I could handle the rejection.

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #31 on: September 06, 2019, 09:45:02 AM »
I worry I may unintentionally wind up at girlsí skate time of day.

Iím incredibly fragile, and Iím not sure I could handle the rejection.

Just make sure you skate the adjoining parking lot as a passive aggressive form of protest. it will help you heal.

Coco Santiagos Kitten

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #32 on: September 06, 2019, 09:45:41 AM »
I flew back to my hometown on Monday and was itching to go to the local park I grew up skating. Rolled up there yesterday, got told that from now onward every second Thursday of the month is a girls skate only day & that I had to leave.

Unfortunately got into an argument with a load of people there and ended up just skating the car park with the other dudes that were turned away. The people organizing it said that female skaters often get intimidated by guys skating the park, which I suppose I can't relate to being male myself. I've never witnessed any hostility towards female skaters at that (or any) park, but then again this is just my perspective.

Trying to work out whether or not my annoyance was justified? or am I overreacting

Its a privately funded park (however its unsupervised, free to enter and open 24/7) so its entirely legit for them to establish rules like this, but this a park I spent virtually every day of my youth in and I'm now finding myself being turfed out due to my gender. I suppose it pissed me off because I'm used to being able to roll up to the park whenever I please.
Dye your hair electric blue. No one will ever assume your gender again.

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50mm

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #33 on: September 06, 2019, 09:52:19 AM »
I guess Iím in the minority at least in those giving their opinion but this shit is fucking stupid. If I drove to the skatepark and this shit was said I would be polite but not leave. I donít get to skate a skatepark often and wouldnít drive home if I drove the 25 minutes it personally takes me to get to the nearest decent one. Maybe itís just me. I grew up with all sisters and a single mom. Iím not even close to being a misogynist. Me and my older sister used to skate together when I was first starting, I recently got my younger sister into skating, and even my girlfriend started skating with me, eating shit and getting back up. When I was in high school my friends girlfriend who was pretty butch skated with us no issue. This shit is dumb pure and simple. If the scooter kids can hang the girls should be able to. I never hear someone talking shit for being a girl.

Betaphenylethylalamine

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #34 on: September 06, 2019, 09:52:41 AM »
"Just playing devils avacado"

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TheLurper

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #35 on: September 06, 2019, 10:00:41 AM »
I back the idea of a girls night. It is pretty obvious that women have been underrepresented in skateboarding, skateboarding is an intimidating space to enter, and there a fair amount of dudes who are still dicks about the girls invading their space. A night where they can skate, film, shoot photos, etc. without having to deal without being judged by the guys is just fine by me.

Not everyone gets judged equally and it makes sense some girls would be worried about the dudes judging them unfairly.

Finally, I always get a good laugh when someone says, "Oh skateboarding is so welcoming. There is no reason for anyone to be intimidated." Entering skateboarding and trying to get a foothold in the subculture was a brutal experience for me. It took years until I could finally enter the local core shop and not feel like a piece of shit. I felt like a complete outsider for years and I had the benefit of not having any physical attributes that set me apart from the "norm."

I never hear someone talking shit for being a girl.
I'm surprised you haven't heard any of this (but it might just mean you skate with a decent group of people).

I was at the local core shop the other day and the owner was telling me how bummed he was on girls getting sponsored because they can't jump down as many stairs as the dudes. I didn't know what to say and I left pretty bummed.
« Last Edit: September 06, 2019, 10:03:56 AM by TheLurper »

Quote from: ChuckRamone
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"that guy is double parked."
"Who cares? there are people starving to death! besides, how does that affect you? does it lessen the joy of parking?

50mm

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #36 on: September 06, 2019, 10:13:09 AM »
I guess it would depend on a lot. All our parks are open outdoor ones. What time are they skating until? Is there a set time that girls night ends? Could I skate and help out? Actually I might not stay if Iím showing up with a big group. I donít want to take a stand and then be responsible for a bunch of dummies.
« Last Edit: September 06, 2019, 10:14:54 AM by 50mm »

wurfnnjs

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #37 on: September 06, 2019, 10:16:58 AM »
this is why street skating exists. You did the right thing by skating the parking lot.
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Audrey II

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #38 on: September 06, 2019, 10:19:24 AM »
this is like you complaining you weren't invited to a random birthday party picnic at a public park that you happen to walk by.

You got questions? Ask me like a fucking man. You know my Insta.

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #39 on: September 06, 2019, 10:19:56 AM »
Iím not a fan of the ďno boys allowedĒ girlsí sessions. Maybe itís sour grapes on my part because these didnít exist when I started skating 20 years ago. I had to learn alone in parking lots, then at 7am at the park before anyone else showed up and finally I had to endure skating with boys at the park as the only girl and I was shitty at skating on top of it.

But I also suspect my experience was pretty similar to most of my peers. Sure it was lonely at first and I did get some bullying/heckling but overall there were more people who were cool to me than not.

It feels like these women want to mitigate the awkward initiation phase of skating by creating a male-excluding safe space. Even without intimidating boys around I donít think itís possible. Skating is hard. You will look stupid on board for awhile before you get it. You will get hurt. You wonít go pro. No one outside of skating will give a shit about your skating so you wonít get that all important validation that all the kids are talking about these days. No athletic scholarships for skateboarding either. And the older you get the more ridiculous your peers find you for continuing to skate. Having a trial by fire phase at the outset is fair warning about whatís to come. If looking stupid in front of boys is enough to scare you away from skating itís probably not the hobby for you. Because skateboarding absolutely requires that you cultivate some level of not giving a fuck.

I am totally for female meet ups that donít involve kicking out males. Iíve participated in plenty. All-women ó or even majority women sessions feel amazing! Itís more relaxed and friendly. But they should happen organically. You donít need to vibe out all guys on account of their gender. And if a dude is being shittyósnaking the girls is a common oneó telling the dude to knock it off is great practice for asserting yourself.

I am for creating womenís skate culture. Iím part of it, most all my skate friends are other women. I am NOT for bubble wrapped safe spaces that inhibit oneís ability to develop resilience and not-giving-a-fuck attitude thatís necessary for skateboarding.

Realize this isnít sympathetic to the original post. Sorry you couldnít skate when you wanted. Iím sorry that what should have been a good positive event has ended up sowing resentment by banning males.  but it also seems like you were resilient enough to have fun elsewhere. Iíd like to see the next generation of female skaters have that some resilience. And I just came across an opportunity to spout off here. Okay rant done.

fang

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #40 on: September 06, 2019, 10:21:21 AM »
The streets await

planman

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #41 on: September 06, 2019, 10:29:33 AM »

I saw your mom do a ollie to cooch drop straight down the big black pole, it was gnarly. she defiantly shut that shit down

LandonPrimo

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #42 on: September 06, 2019, 10:38:52 AM »
If it were me, I'd just go skate somewhere else without even thinking about it but it does seem like it would be more beneficial if they billed it as a Girls skate day, open to all girls and supportive guys. 

Blocking yourself off from the guys does nothing to help you feel included in the overall community.  Teaching the guys why skateboarding is all inclusive, regardless of gender benefits everyone involved.

Have the day, make it focused on girls while showing the guys why this matters and you'll achieve a lot more

I can get behind this. Otherwise, I'd be happy to go another day if it meant some girls can enjoy themselves in peace.

tortfeasor

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #43 on: September 06, 2019, 10:43:34 AM »
I guess Iím in the minority at least in those giving their opinion but this shit is fucking stupid.


i still am not sure whether or not this is a bait thread  but i guess im taking it...
 
A) you're not in the minority.   most people would be bummed if they came back home and went to the unsupervised park thats open 24/7 (which tells me that its at least in part public), and denied entry to a place where they spent their most awkward and insecure years feeling not only comfortable, but free and included.  the shift from the expectation on the skate/drive/walk/bike whatever on the way there to the reality at the door would be pretty off putting. it would be weird to not feel bummed on it.  it is possible to be happy for other people while still being bummed for yourself.

B) unless its is a private park on private land, that's owned and operated by private people, it is "fucking stupid" to shut down a skate park for one group so it can be "more" open for another.  i'm not against whatever-only events, i'm against whatever-only events in shared spaces. if i went to a public park in my hometown and someone told me it was closed to me for a nonessential reason (essential being repairs, crime in progress, make-a-wish, permitted private event) i would be pretty bullshit.

C) it easy to feel unsympathetic to OP- but if it was 9 y/o kid who finally got their parent to drive them 25 min to the "good" skatepark so they could skate, and the parent could spend time just watching their kid have fun i suspect some of you would have a different reaction.
« Last Edit: September 06, 2019, 11:01:24 AM by tortfeasor »
its celebrating life and youth culture. its like dancing and having fun.

Manolo

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #44 on: September 06, 2019, 11:03:58 AM »
I flew back to my hometown on Monday and my pussy was itching

Mount St. Hermdog

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #45 on: September 06, 2019, 11:09:04 AM »
If there are really girls running security at the park like that keeping the boys out I think it's kind of cool they're willing to go to that length and it shows you how important spaces like that are to people, and I back it tbh

Yonnycage

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #46 on: September 06, 2019, 11:12:26 AM »

rapscallion

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #47 on: September 06, 2019, 11:13:51 AM »
Expand Quote
I guess Iím in the minority at least in those giving their opinion but this shit is fucking stupid.
[close]

C) it easy to feel unsympathetic to OP- but if it was 9 y/o kid who finally got their parent to drive them 25 min to the "good" skatepark so they could skate, and the parent could spend time just watching their kid have fun i suspect some of you would have a different reaction.

but it's more fun to call him an incel misogynist entitled pussy with his panties in a wad , fucking idiot needs to be more accepting and inclusive. we should kill him

waltercronkite

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #48 on: September 06, 2019, 11:18:54 AM »
If it were me, I'd just go skate somewhere else without even thinking about it but it does seem like it would be more beneficial if they billed it as a Girls skate day, open to all girls and supportive guys. 

Blocking yourself off from the guys does nothing to help you feel included in the overall community.  Teaching the guys why skateboarding is all inclusive, regardless of gender benefits everyone involved.

Have the day, make it focused on girls while showing the guys why this matters and you'll achieve a lot more

ďWe cannot think of uniting with others, until after we have first united among ourselves.Ē

Basically, women skaters deserve the right to build up their scene for themselves. Its not their responsibility to teach men about inclusion and itís not our responsibility to take over their scene to help them feel included. Men need to educate each other on why itís important and then after all thatís been sorted out things can be different.


Sick Duck

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #49 on: September 06, 2019, 11:22:27 AM »
I have a feeling it was mostly little girls who are just learning how to skate

headtowall

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #50 on: September 06, 2019, 11:26:47 AM »
God forbid people who want to skate in a situation where they feel comfortable without shitheads like you. Even being young and going to the park is a intimidating situation. You will survive you fucking herb.

h00man

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #51 on: September 06, 2019, 11:38:05 AM »
Why didnt you just fucking say you're a woman you fucknut?

 I meet up with her and I'm like wtf and she's got a baby stroller with her pushing it and she's pretty fat now


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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #52 on: September 06, 2019, 11:47:47 AM »
What's next? Varial kickflip for groms day?

Its fuckin funny you head back home and the first thing you want to do is skate a park.
haha deadass

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planman

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #53 on: September 06, 2019, 11:51:54 AM »
Expand Quote
I guess I’m in the minority at least in those giving their opinion but this shit is fucking stupid.
[close]


i still am not sure whether or not this is a bait thread  but i guess im taking it...
 
A) you're not in the minority.   most people would be bummed if they came back home and went to the unsupervised park thats open 24/7 (which tells me that its at least in part public), and denied entry to a place where they spent their most awkward and insecure years feeling not only comfortable, but free and included.  the shift from the expectation on the skate/drive/walk/bike whatever on the way there to the reality at the door would be pretty off putting. it would be weird to not feel bummed on it.  it is possible to be happy for other people while still being bummed for yourself.

B) unless its is a private park on private land, that's owned and operated by private people, it is "fucking stupid" to shut down a skate park for one group so it can be "more" open for another.  i'm not against whatever-only events, i'm against whatever-only events in shared spaces. if i went to a public park in my hometown and someone told me it was closed to me for a nonessential reason (essential being repairs, crime in progress, make-a-wish, permitted private event) i would be pretty bullshit.

C) it easy to feel unsympathetic to OP- but if it was 9 y/o kid who finally got their parent to drive them 25 min to the "good" skatepark so they could skate, and the parent could spend time just watching their kid have fun i suspect some of you would have a different reaction.
Are you implying that people have different reactions to different situations? Stop making false equivalencies.
« Last Edit: September 06, 2019, 11:55:33 AM by planman »

I saw your mom do a ollie to cooch drop straight down the big black pole, it was gnarly. she defiantly shut that shit down

DotGuru

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #54 on: September 06, 2019, 11:56:07 AM »
Many public parks also have beginner sessions or little kid sessions. Do you also get angry at those?

The fact of the matter is that skateparks (and many of the people who frequent them) are intimidating. Some people might show up at a park on a random day and just never skate because they don't feel confident enough or are afraid of doing something that might get them embarrassed--like push mongo, wear the wrong shoes, or grind with both of their trucks.

There is a tremendous amount of hypocrisy in skateboarding, and many of the same people who claim it's for everyone (with their words) will then try to vibe others out (with their actions). I'm a big fan of those that make sure the park locals let the timid ones have a run. Whether they are timid because they are inexperienced, small, young, or a regularly-maligned gender shouldn't matter (and if you don't think female skateboarders are regularly maligned in the skate community, you aren't paying attention).

My 7yo daughter regularly goes to parks with me and she will often refuse to skate, even though I am there. But when we have the park to ourselves, she has a great time. There is a lot that goes on inside each person's head, and their reasons for feeling intimidated are their own.

tortfeasor

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #55 on: September 06, 2019, 12:56:54 PM »
Expand Quote
[
C) it easy to feel unsympathetic to OP- but if it was 9 y/o kid who finally got their parent to drive them 25 min to the "good" skatepark so they could skate, and the parent could spend time just watching their kid have fun i suspect some of you would have a different reaction.
[close]
Are you implying that people have different reactions to different situations? Stop making false equivalencies.

my statement is not a false equivalency.  its a reasonably plausible outcome of a different variable in the same stimulus (males are excluded from the only good skate park in a 25 min radius, nine year olds can be male,  a 9 year old can be exuded). "false equivalency"  would be saying this is no different than a hospital excluding male patients.  if anything its either a cherry picking, or appeal to emotion fallacy
« Last Edit: September 06, 2019, 12:58:56 PM by tortfeasor »
its celebrating life and youth culture. its like dancing and having fun.

planman

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #56 on: September 06, 2019, 01:10:03 PM »
Expand Quote
Expand Quote
[
C) it easy to feel unsympathetic to OP- but if it was 9 y/o kid who finally got their parent to drive them 25 min to the "good" skatepark so they could skate, and the parent could spend time just watching their kid have fun i suspect some of you would have a different reaction.
[close]
Are you implying that people have different reactions to different situations? Stop making false equivalencies.
[close]

my statement is not a false equivalency.  its a reasonably plausible outcome of a different variable in the same stimulus (males are excluded from the only good skate park in a 25 min radius, nine year olds can be male,  a 9 year old can be exuded). "false equivalency"  would be saying this is no different than a hospital excluding male patients.  if anything its either a cherry picking, or appeal to emotion fallacy
Don't kid yourself, the presence of a 9 y/o kid isn't intimidating to women like compared to a grown man's. I kinda doubt that some kid who just happened to show up on that specific day would get excluded from being able to skate, and if that were/is the case then of course most people would look at the situation differently. The only thing I can contend on OPs behalf is that it might've been helpful to try to get the word out beforehand so everyone can plan accordingly, but even then it's hard to get word to everyone in a large dispersed community.

I saw your mom do a ollie to cooch drop straight down the big black pole, it was gnarly. she defiantly shut that shit down

Youoverthere

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #57 on: September 06, 2019, 01:27:53 PM »
God forbid people who want to skate in a situation where they feel comfortable without shitheads like you. Even being young and going to the park is a intimidating situation. You will survive you fucking herb.
Right! I feel intimidated and uncomfortable  around white people because I never know when one of yíall will shoot up a school or a park. So can we get some sessions with NO WHITE SKATERS.

Skateboarder X

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #58 on: September 06, 2019, 01:33:05 PM »
guess you gotta go skate the streets instead... bummer. wont find too many girls out there...

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Re: Kicked out of the park because it was a girls only session
« Reply #59 on: September 06, 2019, 01:35:16 PM »
I recently went to skate my local park and it was closed off for the next 4 hours for Summer skateboarding lessons (for young skaters only). I was annoyed, but it was kind of a blessing because I just went cruising around instead; I ended up reconnecting somewhat with my inner child (barf, I know right?) and why I started skating in the first place.

Basically, the skatepark is a prison. Those bitches did you a favor.